Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

Destiny was calling me, so I picked up the phone.

What do you get when you mix a burrito and an earthworm? Diaherea

you suck

Factors that can increase your risk of prostate cancer include: Older age Being black Family history of prostate cancer Obesity My friend's grandfather is black and obese, his 70th birthday is tomorrow and his dad died of prostate cancer

These two guys walk into a bar. You'd think the second guy would've noticed it was there.

What's black and white and nailed to the floor? A skunk that's nailed to the floor.

What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

what do u call a 50 yr old man at disneyland a rapist

Yo mama is so fat, she eats three times the normal amount of calories one should eat in a single day. This resulted in her early demise, to which you mourned for numerous months before accepting the fact that she was gone.

Yo mama's has so much acne, I decided to give her proactive.

How do you make a sandwich out of clay? Shape it like a sandwich

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an abosolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

Knock knock Who's there Fetty Fetty who? Fetty Wap Hey what's up hello

A man walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doctor, help! My hair is falling out! I need something to keep it in!" The doctor says, "sure. Here's some medicine."

What's the difference between car keys and truck keys? Literally nothing.

What do you call an englishman who wakes up in Africa Confused

What's red and a cow? Red cow

What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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