Why did the baby cry? His dad was holding him upside down over a fire.

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how do you get a 1 armed moron out of a tree? you wave

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What did the duck say when it saw a puddle? Nothing.Ducks are uncapable of speaking human speech.

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Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

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YOU

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A man walks in front of a bus. The bus driver avoids the man but hits the boy eating ice cream.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is a chicken and is not intelligent enough to know that he is about to be hit by a bus while hopelessly searching for food under an elderly man's nose.

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What's the difference between a taxidermist and an astronomer ? They have a different job.

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So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

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Did you hear about the guy who lost his whole left side??? Yeah he's all right now!!!

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Why dont blind people go skydiving? Because they dont live when they hit the ground

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A 75 year old man walks into a college classroom and sits down. He suffers from severe dementia and realizes that he's been in the classroom before. A 75 year old man walks into a college classroom...

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A man walks into a bar, a man behind him doesn't.

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yo mama so dumb she got hit by a parked car. ~YN~

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

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What did the little gril with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer

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A man calls his wife, but she doesn't pick up. He comes home and shouts his wife's name, but no one responds. He walks upstairs and sees the bedroom door half-opened. He enters and sees his wife sleeping.

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what is friendship? when friends go on a ship

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what is worse then finding a worm in your apple find a worm in your ass

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Why was the chipmunk watching TV? Because a new Family Guy was on.

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Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

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What's worse than having a bad hair day? Vietnam.

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An epileptic man attends a rave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops