What's the difference between my mom, and a bag of garbage? A bag of garbage is incapable of contracting aids

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The biggest lie in the world . . . I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down -2

WHY DID THE MAN RUN A MILE?.BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO CATCH HIS NOSE AND GET A TISSUE

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you know your cat is gay? Other cats have buttsex with him

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Society has given up on chairs that spin.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal, and this wasn't just any road. It was the new highway built, with frequent traffic jams and a speed limit of 90 mph.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats worse than 2 people dying? 3 people dying.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you make friends with a squrriel? Trust me, don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the stereo break? Cause little Johnny threw a bat at it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do you call a kid in a wheelchair? . handicapped.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you get a bird off the roof you throw an ax at it

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats the difference between a guitar and a fish? A guitar is an instrument used to produce noise and a fish is a living orgnism native to lakes and oceans

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats a buch of blacks running down a hill called? The Detroit, MI marathon in seeing that 84.3% of Detroit's population is of Arican descent.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why wasn't my T.V. on? Because I didn't have a remote.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops