What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I'm a poet and I just didn't realise

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. somebody recognizes him and immidiately asks for his autograph

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Caca.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

am man walks into a bar, and suffers from brain damage

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Want to hear a joke? Me too.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

lybia

thumb_up thumb_down +14

yo mamas so ugly she is often made fun of andridiculed about her appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

You know what's addicting? Heroine.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Will you marry me? No, I'm cake.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

yada yada

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

*Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends* *The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment.* Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what did the parapelegic (limbless) kid get for his birthday? Heart failure

thumb_up thumb_down +37

God saw himself. Finally, proof.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The truth is he loves her!!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops