What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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What's worse than dropping an ice cream cone? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Dropping two ice cream cones.

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What's the only type of wood that doesn't float? Natalie wood.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, which would e very unsafe to do.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

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What's sad about a dead person? He was my friend.

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what do call a girl with a waterslide nose? Ava Sherman

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What are blacks scared of? The kkk

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This, is indeed the funniest joke you will ever read, honest! "shows joke on written paper"

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That was slightly painful. I would appreciate it if you would stop such actions in the future

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Yo mama so short, she developed a debilitating neck problem from having to look up at people when talking to them.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

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Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

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A Priest and a young child walk into a dark alley.... It leads to a church and he talks to the young boy about God

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Two hunters walk in to the forest. They have a great time ending the lives of defenceless creatures. They go to their respective homes, eat a light dinner, and fall asleep in their beds.

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I see London, I see France, I am in an airplane on my way to Europe.

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Q:What did the policemen say to the other policemen? A:Safe

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Roses are green Violets are yellow Those are the wrong colors oh well who gives a shit.

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What do an elephant and a plum have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops