A blonde girl is lying dead on the floor with a potato peeler in her hand, what killed her? Substance abuse and loneliness.

If you throw a violist and a soprano off a cliff, which one would hit the ground first? Who cares?

Gracias por depositar mi dinero, y tener un buen día, adios.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

Knock knock Whos there? Orphan. Orphan who? Orphan miller. Orphan miller who? Orphan miller jones. Orphan miller jones who? Thats it. Oh okay, I get it you're doing a knock knock joke Yeah. did it go alright? Yeah I guess, untill we started talking in 3rd person.

WHY DO IDIOTS RIGHT STUPID JOKES BECAUSE THEY HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO WITH THERE LIVES.

Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

whats the best thing about polio...death

Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

Why did billy fall off the sea-saw Because he got kicked in the throat

why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

What's 1+1 2, dumbass...

whats long and black on a black guy slavery

Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

How many women are in the world? a little over 3.2 billion because statistics show that there are roughly 51-52% females in the whole population of humans

3 men in a boat One day there were a American, Mexican, and a Chinese men in a boat. The Chinese man threw over a fortune cookie and said we have to many of these in our country. The Mexican threw over a taco and said we have to many of these in our country. The American threw over the Mexican and said we have to many of these in our country. The End

why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

roses arent always red, they can be pink or white. violets are violet, not blue. your pretty lets have sex.

OGC - tilt your head

What should you do if a stranger picks you up? Politely request that he put you down.

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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