If I was a regular squirrel, I would be pissed at flying squirrels.

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a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

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Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

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Roses are red Violets are twisted bend over now your about to get fisted

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Doctor, people dont notice me anymore, doctor?... HEEEEEEEEEEEY!

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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why did the man jump out of the plane without a parachute? Im not really sure, maybe to commit a slow and painful suicide.

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when life gives you lemons throw them away.. they are probably bad

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What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? Friends

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Why was the mom crying? Her son was found in the oven.

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What's the difference between people who make dead baby jokes and people who don't make dead baby jokes? I don't avoid eye contact with people who don't make dead baby jokes.

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Why did the drunk man puke? Because he was drunk.

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A dyslexic boy is writing an essay. Luckily, his disease is mild and he does not misspell anything.

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A fish swims up stream for his natural spawning cycle. The fish was out of shape and died from heart failure.

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A boy eats 3 pounds of candy, 2 whole pizzas, and drinks 10 beers. Why did he puke? Someone came out of nowhere, and kicked him in the nuts

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There was a guy and a girl naked in bed, sleeping together. When they woke up they didn't remember the last 72 hours and wanted some questions answered, including Where am I? Who are you? What year is it? What's my name?

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Who is green? Mike Wazowsky.

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Why didn't grandma ever return Johnathon's calls? Grandma was brutally murdered 2 years prior. Johnathon had issues believing that she was gone. He went on to live a life of pain and suffering, which would eventually lead to suicide at the age of 24.

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Why did the bus crash? Because the driver was a watermelon.

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What do you cal a thousand black people swimming to Africa with a Jew under each arm? Waterboarding.

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Whats the difference between a cobra and the hulk? One is my penis and the other one is a cobra.

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Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

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You mamma so fat, she should consider going on a diet.

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why did the chicken cross the road? why do you care?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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