What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

What do 69 and 420 have in common? That was my score on my Math final:(

Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

What's green and has wheels? A snow flake. I lied about the wheels, and the color.

What did the umpire yell to the flatulent player at bat? FOUL BOWEL!

Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.

Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

Lisa: Omg Karen, just had sex with Ben, his weiner was sooo tiny lol. Ben: I think you sent me the wrong text.

What do you call a man that's very angry? A Very Angry Man.

Why did Billy drop his lunchbox? Because he was mauled by a Hippo.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which evidently do not understand the dangers of crossing a busy road.

How do you fit 3 squirtles two bulbasors and a charmander in a smart car You poke em on

Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a friend chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

There's two homosexuals having sex in the back of a van...........they're over 21 what's wrong with that!

Why was a woman crying in a corner of a room She was raped

What did the deaf guy get for Christmas? An iTunes gift card

Why did the Jew fall off a cliff? Someone pushed him

Roses are red, bikers are blur.....I love you ( drunk texting )

Why did the black guy love his new shirt? Because it was 100% cotton

Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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