A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What did Thisara say? You cant see me bich

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A Man walks into a car dealership and asks the salesman "How many of these Blue ones do you have in stock" ? The salesman looks at the Man and begins to cry. "Why are you crying" asks the Man "I had a dog named Blue once" replied the salesman. And then he ate a taco in front of the Man,wiped his hands on his slacks and slowly backed away from him. The Man thought to himself..."Gee I'm hungry" and left the car dealership to go buy a taco instead.

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Why do cats have eyes? So they can see.

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Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

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A local police officer pulls up to tell you something. Listen carefully: Three zebras have been spotted crossing the Mexican border. He goes into his truck, pulls out a can of marbles, peanut butter, seven velcro straps and a rhino horn covered in glitter. Your mission is simple: Kill the zebras using your equipment. You will be rewarded if you have enough peanut butter to make a sandwich after. Go now... Get it done.

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what did the downsindrome get for christmas?? A: Aids and a Dead wife

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Why Do Black Men Like Koolaid Because its red

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Why did Margret eat the banana? She was hungry.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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"why did the chicken cross the road?" "to get to your house" "knock knock" "who's there?" "The chicken"

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Steve. Steve who? Steve Johnson, and I'm legally obligated to inform you that I'm a sex offender.

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Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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God is almighty, as such he ANSWERS TO NO ONE! Moral: What you praying for then bitch?

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Why did the black guy cross the road? To save the endangered child from getting hit by a car across the street.

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I like my 40's like I like my women, in ABUNDANCE.

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What did the black man do when he saw a bike sitting on the sidewalk? He took it into the shop paid for it and rode off feeling good about how hes helping the environment.

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Susie had no arms and no legs.. what did she get for Christmas? Cancer. Amy was riding on a swing.. who was pushing her? Not Susie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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