Why didn't the parachute open? nevermind

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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no

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How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

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What is black, white and red all over? Many things.

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My friend came in the barber's shop and asked me to cut his hair for him, i always have rude banter with him and i made a joke about his big bate nose. He acused me of calling him Jewish and threatened to sue me. This is how i found out that he was a white supremisist.

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what is the difference between a black person and a picnic bench? A picnic bench can support a family.

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A black man rode down the street on a bicycle.

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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whats big, black and red all over? My mom when its that time of the month

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An iguana walks out of a bar

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Knock Knock! It's me! Hello? Hello! Why didn't they answer him? He was at the desert, with a disconnected phone. Also, my Captcha for this is "lose face" Good job solf mediya

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Yo mama's so ugly that the majority of people find her physically unattractive, but I hear her personality if great.

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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

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why did the goat go up the ladder? because its ladder goat

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What is big, hard, and bushy? My Penis. I lied about it being bushy.

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Q: What do dogs and wind have in common? A: They're both blue. Except the dog. Or the wind. Wind is colorless.

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how come bob felt 'under pressure'? because somebody dropped a dumpster on him

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Roses are red Violets are baskets This joke makes no sence... ... boobs

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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Where's my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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