What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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If you have a large penis.give this joke a thumbs up. ( :

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A duck walks into a bar and is immediately shot to prevent the spread of bird flu.

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On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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A duck and a chicken walk into a bar. How improbable.

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A black succeeds

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Ayy mon, come smoke dis weed wit ma

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what's the difference between a black man and a bench? the bench is an inanimate object

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What Do You Call A Fake Noodle? ----An Impastaaa!!!!!

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What's the difference between difference and between? One is different and the other between.

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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roses are red violets are blue

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The cookie monster walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why do you seem so blue?" Everyone laughed. Then the cookie monster replied "my wife died."

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What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

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What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

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3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

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What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

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Women's rights

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It's okay, I got the yogurt.

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? A: This question has many different possible answers due to the range of sizes and shapes of bath tubs available on the market, and also depending on the size of the baby in question. It is therefore only possible to give a specific example.

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i am an idiot if you read this outloud your a dumb ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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