GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT i farted. : l

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? If they didn't, their turnout gear would not effectively protect them from flames.

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person one: ask me if im a carrot person two: are you a carrot? person one: nope (the walks away)

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eden stop

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Q. Why did the fence break? A. Too many mexicans were climbing it.

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whats long and black? a baton

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A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

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What's worse than a joke An ANTIJOKE!

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There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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What did Big Dog say to Little Dog? "We are both dogs."

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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Knock knock Who's there? Carrot Carrot who? Carrot in the tree house, cause it's orange.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply because he was incapable of speech.

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Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

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Suck my bigvagina you faggetass bitchybuns

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Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

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What did the priest get for Christmas? Herpes

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Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Study from real life: My trip to Texas. (From the time when I was interested in mormon-ism.) Texan: And here is my gun collection, great for shootin yer Mexican scum. Me: Uh I am Norwegian but my ancestors where Russian or something so my skin is... Texan: *points gun at me and pushes trigger halfways* Just kidding der son, sure you aint no Mexican though? Okay just checkin ya know... Me *sweating bullets* Texan guys gun go off almost hitting me and breaking a vase.. Conclusion: He blamed me, everyone had lunch outside later, everyone kept looking at the "trigger happy MEXICAN"... Nero: By then I began grasping the fact that I was better suited for the study of the dark arts... And also learned that in Mormonism, Heaven and Hell are planets locked into war, where black people where neutral, and red people are demon supporters, but WE CAN ALL BE SAVED BY BECOMING WHITE! JUST LIKE THE ANGEL MORONI! Conclusion two: Moroni... Lol.

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What's black and white, and red all over ? An interracial couple who were both gruesomely decapitated in a freak car accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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