Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was both deaf and blind and both senses are essential to a driver

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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What do u firmly grasp and stroke until u can't go any longer? A shakeweight....

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mothers funeral.

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Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

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How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? -Allergies.

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why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her and kill her family.

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How did little Jimmy survive the 20 story fall? He couldn't he died from the last fall, aren't you paying attention?

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I met a fat girl and fucked her on an elevator. . . It was wrong on so many levels.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari. A Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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what is funnier then a man with AIDS? -nearly anything as AIDS is a serious medical condition and could be potentially lethal

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Why did the blond girl walk into the street pole? Because she wasn't paying attention.

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Why couldn't the little boy see anything? It was dark outside.

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Why do fishermen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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How many jews does it take to- I have alzheimers

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You know that you are going to fail horribly when... your purpose generally defeats the mission.

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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What's worst than your computer breaking? Your face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops