A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

what is the differance between a toyata and a van full of dead babies I dont own a toyata

Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

Whats ironic about the Facebook "like" button? Nothing

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer...you will die

Sex. That is all.

What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

Your so stupid, that your stupid.

Whats funnier than a jew holding a nickel. Nothing. Jews are cheap.

What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

Whats similar about an elephant and a plum? Theyre both gray, except for the plum

Q: What did the blonde woman say when she got slaped by her friend? A: Ow.

Have you noticed when you see geese flying and they're in a V pattern, often one side will be longer than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side.

Why does kelly keep going on about breasts ? cus shes into chicks !!!

Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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