Why did the little boy ride his bike to school? It was a birthday present.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

2 boys are going to get candy from the store. What happened? A robbery and they were killed

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Your mother is so fat, when she dives into a pool, the on duty life guard blows his whistle to get her attention. He then proceeds to tell her about the dangers of diving into a pool with the depth of 5ft or less and asks her not to continue her antics. She is not pleased but decides it is best to follow the rules.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Why did he? NO I LOST THE CHICKEN Later: Knock knock Who's there The chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the black man shoot the white guy? the white man was about to hurt the black mans family.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the girl not apply for her American CItizenship? She was already an American Citizen.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

You've got more chins than a Chinese... Girl with a lot of chins, because she's so fat

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A horse walks into a bar... The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have testicular cancer........"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why didn't the Orphan finish his lemonade. His legs got chopped off.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red Violets are blue Cats meow Dogs have four legs

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops