If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, chocolate milk.

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Mirror mirror on the wall. Why can't I see?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

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yo momma so fat i abuse my wife

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You know what's better than a taco? A better taco.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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What did the heroin addict get for Christmas? Aids from a used needle.

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How did the black man cross the Atlantic? An airplane. He also could have used a boat. However, airplanes are a preferred form of travel.

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What do the snake and the bird have in common? They can both fly, except for the snake...

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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how do you wake up lady gaga? you set her alarm for the intended time

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How do you judge a black person? By the content of their character.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the slaughterhouse was on the other side.

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retard

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A lawyer gets admitted to a bar.

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your momma is so dumb.. ... because she was a slacker in high school but then turned her life around and is now a respected member of society

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What's the difference between a bird and a horse? - Both can fly, exept the horse.

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How did the marines cross the minefield safely at night? Under a full moon

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The Jewish boy asks his dad for 50 dollars His dad says " 40 dollars? what do you need 30 dollars for? "

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what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

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Q: Whats the difference between a table and a Mexican? A: You tell me.

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What happens when you light a truck full of babies on fire and drive it off a cliff filled with lava and set off explosives when they land? The babies die. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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The term "shots fired" often reminds me of the time a couple of buddies had a drinking contest and I shoved a lit cigarette down the loser's throat

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Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops