What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

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roses are red violets are blue i am bipolar so am i

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Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

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a man asked another man what time its it. The man responded by telling him the time and asking why he wanted to know. "thats none of your business" he replied. Why did he say it was none of his business? A- because it was none of his business.

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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a Jewish preist grew up in a black family. what do you call them? a loving family.

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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Q: Why did the little girl fall from the swing? A: Because she didn't have arms. Q2: And why did she fall from the swing again? A2: Because she tried to get on it again.

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a christian man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a jewish man asked god a question. he did not get an answer. a muslim man asked god a question. he too, did not get an answer. an atheist man asked god a question. he got his answer.

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What did the black kid get for christmas?? Your tv

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Dude! That movie was so gay! It had a bunch of naked men having sex with other naked men!

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Roses are red Violets are blue im a retard dictionary

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Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

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roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS i'm about to die

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A man and woman was sitting at a bar. The man bought the woman a roofied drink and she has never been seen again.

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Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

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A man walks into a doctors office and waits for his turn. After his name was called he walked up to the doctor and told him that he kept having hallucinations. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic to help with the mans addiction to LSD.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? I'm sleeping with your wife

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Magic Johnson has AIDS

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What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

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What looks like a duck, smells like a duck and feels like a duck? A duck.

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There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

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knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

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What has no eyes no arms no legs and the lack of a brain? You for liking this joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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