Why can't the Mexican float? He never learned the proper technique as he was not allowed to take swim class.

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How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Douse it in gas and throw it in a fire

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Q. What does FIAT stand for? A. Frenzied Italian At Traffic-lights.

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How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

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Wanna hear a joke? Your life.

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An airplane crashes into a state park. There are no survivors. Susan continues her stroll in the park, considering she is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair, she isn't aware of the nearby disturbance

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What did the widow get for her birthday? Nothing from her husband.

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What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

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Q: what would george washington be doing if he were alive right now? A: screaming in his grave

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Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

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two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

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What did the German say to the Jew? Welcome to Germany we hope you enjoy your stay

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Knock knock. Hello dear. Come in.

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

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How many dead babies can you fit in my car? None, I don't allow anyone to put dead babies in my car.

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What did the scientist say to the postman? So your a postman?

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What's fast and white ? A chicken after you hit it going 100mph

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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Juggling lions and breast feeding.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

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Person: kk Person1: did you just kk me? Person: no

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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