Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

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Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

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why was the man scared of the tree because it was shady

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What KFC? Deep fried aborted babies.

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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Why didn't the Priest have a TV ? A black man stole it

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Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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Why did the egg crossed the road? If X = chicken and C = the speed of light, then 2 to the power of the road which is 12 feet across times X/C = egg

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What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

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How do you sleep? With a knife I just saved a lot of money by switching to Geico......with a knife I'm going to the restroom, with a knife. How do you do a back flip with no hands? With a knife. What is 2 plus 2? The answer is 4, with a knife. Would like you like to go see a movie with me...with a knife? Today, I'm going to show you how bake a strawberry chocolate cake...with knife. I'm sorry, you have the wrong number...with a knife. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side....with a knife. A man walks to a bar and orders a shot of vodka....with a knife. Omg, I just saw Miley Cyrus at the mall today....with a knife. In Soviet Russia, blah blah blah, with a knife. How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? 1, with a knife. I'll be back in time for dinner, I'm going to the gym and work on my abs....with a knife.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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how do fit 104 jews in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 100 in the ash tray.

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. He might have trouble focusing, but his ADHD in no way prevents him from completing such a task.

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What happens when you try to rescue a cat from a tree? It jumps on your face, falls down, and dies.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The Big Bang. -BG_Shank_A

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Why did the young boy die from Aggressive cancer? ...Because there isn't a cure.

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Geography Teacher: What caused the earthquake of Japan? Me: Godzilla constipated too hard, and it caused an earthquake. Tsunami was the result of his poo. Geography Teacher: then how do you explain the after shocks...? Me: Godzilla shat his pants after the toilet

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knock knock ? Who's there ? idunnop idunnop who ? Eww you've done a what?!

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What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter on the street? A very nice man because a homeless man just dropped that and he was trying to return it. Rob W

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Why did it look like the girl peed herself? Because she peed herself

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You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

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whats worst than reading youtube comments? Panic at the disco

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What do you call a Mexican hockey player? A hockey player.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops