What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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one day a grape was in the sun raisin

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Q. How do you break into a store that's closed? A. You walk in, I was lying about it being closed.

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If I threw a regular snowball at a random snowman, would my action directly result in the increase of the snowman's size or would it rather have caused to snowball to become substantially larger in succession? Only a few people could answer that question. Not all of us are actually philosophy aficionados after all.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes. A mutilated dear.

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What's worse than accidentally biting your tongue? Hitler accidentally biting your tongue.

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Why did the grandma stop baking cookies? Because she is an aging widow suffering from depression because her family seems to forget her existance as she barely lives day by day wilting in her 1 bedroom home.

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What do you call it when you mix a raccoon with an 18-wheeler? A bloody mess on the highway. That smells like cheese

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Name two things that are stupid and can get stupider. You can't , there's only one a blonde

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why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

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what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

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What happens when the hydro goes out for 1 second? 1 minute? 1 hour? 1 day? 1 month? 1 year? -1.8 people die. 105 people die. 6,306 people die. 151,338 people die. 4,603,198 people die. 55,238,376 people die. Aw shit, then you have to take account for how many people die of starvation :\, and the ones who froze to death, and the ones who died from heat stroke, And the ones who died of Alzheimers.

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hi to the world fromthe world

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roses are red violets are blue me n' friends guna rape you trolololoLOLOLOlololOLLOLOLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLO01010101010111 666

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A women in her kitchen hears a thud outside. Her husband fell off the roof.

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What is cowboy say

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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What did the onion say to the the the other other onion Ima cut you fool and make yall cry

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

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what's 9+10? 19, not 21

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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