Whats the difference between a cobra and the hulk? One is my penis and the other one is a cobra.

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What's brown and sticky? Molasses.

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Stop. Seriously stop.

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What is worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

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Why was the Jewish holocaust bad? Because it's joke always end up on anti-jokes and millions of Jewish people where murdered in it.

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what is the awesomest of them all? me

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got hitted by a drunken driver and died last week, when he was cycling to school.

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How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

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A man walks into a bra, he is an alcoholic and is destroying his family

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whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

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How does God choose who goes to heaven? I'm just kidding, there's no God.

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2 people with ADD are playing baseball. One of them pitches to the other guy and the other guy swings his arms around, misses, then gets hit by a baseball bat. The batter then realized he was the pitcher and the other guy has gone off chasing after a bird that just flew by.

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What's your blood type? Red.

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Q.whats the worlds funniest joke???? A.not this one this ones crap

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how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

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How does a pirate get to work? His CAAAARRRR! Where does the pirate go after work? The BAAAARRRR! How does the pirate get home from the bar? A taxi. A pirate doesn't drive after consuming alcohol.

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The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

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What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because fish don't have legs and can't walk anywhere

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What do you call a man with one ear? A one-eared man.

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knock knock who's there Scott, Scott who, Scott Rollheiser stole my joke and posted it here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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