Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Reminding you of your religion. The army led by God attacked their foes at the mountains, yet had to flee because the enemy had plated steel wagons. Moral: Either God cant beat steel, or he was not there at all, its your call gents, because reading Ave Maria 50 times each time you sin, without reading the whole thing, does not even make you a Christian you FUCK (yes I can curse, you cannot)

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I know where you live. No seriously im looking at you through your window. 80% of you just checked. 90% of you didnt realize i just ended that statement with a question mark. 100% of you just checked gotcha

thumb_up thumb_down +28

live babies

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why didn't the unicorn have a horn? It was a horse. Why didn't the horse have a horn? it was not a unicorn.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

how do you get an A in a class? idk never got on.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

The WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -7

You want to know how I know you're gay You want to have sex with a person of the same sex

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the man sit down? Because he was tired of standing up.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When do doctors make house calls? When you're sick.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than standing in line at Walmart? Being raped. What's worse than paying an outrageous amount for whatever it is you bought at Walmart? Being pregnant with a rape baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the lion say to the octopus? Nothing, lions can't talk, and even if they did the chances of a lion and octopus meeting are very slim.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

If Jimmy in New York has 2 apples, and Tommy in Denver has 4 apples, what is the mass of the sun? 1.989E30 kg.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

who's a knob,a liar, and systematically ruining a once well-run family football club by employing crooks , buying footballers who are well-passed there sell-out date and getting the team relegated ? steve kean not laughing ? nor are 23 ,000 others

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops