Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did the baby cry? Someone threw a brick at his head.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the donkey kick the men bc he tryed to pen the tail on hes ass

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: What did the donkey say to the man? A: "Hello there, sir." it was later discovered the man was tripping on the hallucinogen LSD. Later on the man plummeted to his death after being convinced that he was a pterodactyl, and jumping off of a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A guy walks into a bar and says 'Ow!'

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are grey Violets are grey I live in Africa Give me water

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q.How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A.You don't. You kill her.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the cutest thing about a redhead? I know, I couldnt think of anything either

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: What do you call a women with 2 bowling pins? A: A women with 2 bowling pins.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

thumb_up thumb_down

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

thumb_up thumb_down -24

"Really, how is your wife?" "You know she's dead right?" "Cool mine too!" They high five in mid air and lived happily ever after

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? hit him in the head with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is worse than going to school? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why is the sky blue? You like men.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man loses his wife in a car accident He then fall into a deep depression then hangs himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I'm called the! no i wish am I left

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock. *Silence Knock knock *silence Knock knock *Silence KNOCK KNOCK. *Silence (Busts open door) Oh right I murdered Billy a week ago

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Theodore was a small kid that lived down the street. Little did he know, that Kaiwen the Poor Pedo was his next door neighbour. So he was walking one day down the street. He saw Kaiwen dead. Because he ate too much sugar. So Theodore called the police. But his phone broke suddenly. Theodore realized that his brother had filled it with broken eggshells. He was sad. He took out a few golf balls and stuffed them in his mouth. But he couldnt forget taht a fellow neighbour had died. He buried the body beneath the Carpet of Ol' Justin's House. He wasnt happy. His dad confiscated his laptop. And the golf balls

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops