Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

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What happens if an unmovable object gets hit by an unstoppable force? To get to the other side.

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A feminist walked into a bar and had her period

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why did sarah have to do overtime at work? because i set her house on fire

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whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

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the joke below me is not an anti joke

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What's worse than this joke? Taking a dump on an airplane as it crashes in to the World Trade Center.

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3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

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> Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? > Because he had severe autism and was Ambulophobic.

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Why'd the boy fall off his bike? The holocaust

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How did the priest die? Masterbation

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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A man walks into a bar with his dog. He orders 14 shots and proceeds to drink. For each shot he takes, he feeds one to his dog, who accepts it willingly. The bartender says "Well I've never seen anything stranger. Why did you order 14 shots, and why are you giving half to your dog." "Well," says the man, "my 14 year old dog was diagnosed with a fatal heart condition. I cannot afford to put him down, so the shots should kill him." The dog then dies.

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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If I said "This AntiJoke will get thumbs up" It will get thumbs up

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why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

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Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? Because it wanted to be a monkey? Why did the John fall out of the tree? Because he has no arms and legs because he suffers from a severe case of lepracy. Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by three monkeys, a fridge and a boy with no limbs.

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A man walks into a dairy. Most people will not get this as it is cultural slang and they will think it is referring to dairy products.Oh well. This was going to be a good joke.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

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Why was the black man picking cotton from the backyard? Because he enjoys gardening as a hobby, and prefers to do it every Sunday, after work.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't so much cross the road as he did go down the road, to the supermarket, where he was sold to a family of 5, and taken down yet another road to the family's house, where they enjoyed a nice family dinner.

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What is a homeless man for Halloween? A garbage bag

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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