What do you call a beagle and an eagle mixed together? A beagle.

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so the guy @ the asian restaurant ask the waiter why his beverage tastes funny and the asian waiter says "It's likely that you are used to classic coke and they changed the formula"

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

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Whats a lion in Antartica? . Dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have down syndrome duh dusfy druah

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why didthe man's computer crash? the man has a serious porn addiction

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

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there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The horse, being unable to understand the barman, breaks a table and shits on the floor.

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What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

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Michael Jackson walks into a daycare center.

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whats red and falls from a tree an apple

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What's hotter than a beautiful girl in a bikini? Among many things, the Sun, the Earth's core, the inside of a volcano...

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Why didn't the little girl show up for school? Because she was dead.

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Whats easier to fit in a trunk, babies or concrete bricks? Babies because you can hit them with a pitchfork.

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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What's cooler than being cool? Being really cool

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What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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But who would want to sell us out and why?

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What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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