-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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What does a man and an orange have in common? Nothing.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Im blind

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A homosexual black man and a 13 year old child are in the shower at the local gym. The black man says to the boy "you dropped your soap, why don't you pick it up?" The boy promptly thanks the black man, picks up his soap and continues to shower.

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Everyone is different, but there are two of me, therefore I am unique. I have 72 different personalities, which all think, act and behave the same, all have my same name, but its still different to have such a thing eh? No I am not asking, I just added that weird little lightbulb symbol after "eh". People buy my book, its full of this nonsense... Its named "Are you left winged, or wrong winged" The book that has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with politicians non existent sexlife! (seriously I had a book signing today... It was weird, people like stood in line twenty Signatures... AND PEOPLE ARE ALL GOING "HEY ARE YOU THAT GUY FROM HORSEHEAD?" Nero -WHO THE FUCK! IS THAT GUY ON HORSEHEAD?

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? -getting raped by 10 very hung men who go balls deep

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When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This doesn't rhyme F*ck it

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What do you call a black scuba diver... A scuba diver.

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"One fish, two fish, red fish, the holocost." -Dr. Seuss

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A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to go well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that when his wife was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas, despite that the tank was full and she only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrendous car accident that caused the fuel to empty and catch fire. Mary survived but their 6 month old baby was killed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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A paraplegic women falls off a boat. Regardless of the fact that she was wearing a properly inflated flotation device, she still managed to drown. She died instantly, the next day.

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What do u call a man pointing a gun at you? A man with an anger issue

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Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No, he hasn't either

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Billy. Oh, come on in. You could have just knocked on my door or rang doorbell without saying "Knock Knock" though, that's kind of childish.

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What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

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How do you teach an old dog a new trick? Answer: You can't

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What do you a black man who isn't flying a plane? Well, that depends on his occupation.

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"knock knock" "whos there?" there was no response from the other side but the knocking continued, the homeowner felt distressed so phoned the police...

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Why was 6 afraid of 8 because 8 kidnap 7

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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