Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

Wat is brown and sticky? A stick

Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

How do you trap a squirrel? You carefully set up a trap and place acorns in the trap.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

Knock knock Whos there? ... You got ding dong ditched

A British man walks into a dentist's office.

What's brown and sticky? Poop

how many members of the australian greens party does it take to write legislation? none, it's already been done for them by Karl Marx

Why did Joseph kick the pig in the face? He though it'd be funny.

What's worse than swing a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Why did William commit suicide? Because his grandmother had recently died of terminal cancer. His mother left him on the front step when he was two, and moved to Tennessee with her baby daddy.

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Dick Cheney are in a room, what are they doing? A: Breathing

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

A Knock, Knock B There's no door. What are you knocking on?

why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

Do you know why i dont write poems Because i thought that violets were violets OTARTS...WAS...HERE

I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

why is your hair black? it was heretitery.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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