What did the blonde say when she saw a box of cheerios? "Lovely, I think I'll have some of these for breakfast today. The wholegrain will be good for me."

thumb_up thumb_down -39

I just met you, And this is crazy. So call me Kony, I stole you're baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats not green and cant pee? Not a pea!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's black and white and read all over? Corn, I lied about everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What did the farmer say when he coudn't find his tractor? A: "where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the boy walking in circles? One of his feet was nailed to the floor...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

rocky is here again.......................

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Gauss what ur mama said last night nothing i found her dead

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a dinosaur that doesn't lay eggs? A male dinosaur

thumb_up thumb_down

why do people just recycle the same jokes over and over are you that desperate for some f*cking attention? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the Protoss player say when he lost to a Terran player? I concede defeat. You simply have a greater mastery over the game than I.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a man with no home or family? Charles Manson…He currently resides in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

"Knock knock..." "come in"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

You know what they say about women with really big feet? They actually don't say anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Lol (wow, I am using that a lot... BAAAD!) Anyway, yeaaaah, you thanked me for being who I am, this rush of happy drugs from the body is totally a sign of taking insult... Funny, I am not much of a endorphin person otherwise.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops