Where does the Queen of England live? England.

Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

Guy 1: Hey look under there Guy 2: Under what inanimate object that is physically visible and made up of atoms

Why did the homeless man steal food from the local grocery store? He had not eaten in three days and was forced to steal or risk possible starvation.

How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

bob saget

how do you kill a giraffe? shoot it

Arab 1: Du good bai me, and I'll du good bai you. Arab 2: Ye men, sounds good men. Arab 3: O man, no way. Arab 4: K, u wait...jus wait n see.. Arab 5: I no interest! Me so saudi! Arab 6: D'oh...ha, ha, haa! Arab 7: This is so bahrain...I'm going to go club some protesters.

-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

Wath black poeple eat for christmas your food.

A guy walks into a bar. He then comes home at 4 a.m. to beat his wife.

Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

A blonde and a brunette both starred in a TV show.. It was called Beavis and Butthead.

what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

What did one baby say to the other? Nothing, they were both killed in a building collapse.

What's the difference between a black man and cake? I like cake.

Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

What did one Chinese man say to the other? ?????

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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