What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is a chicken and is not intelligent enough to know that he is about to be hit by a bus while hopelessly searching for food under an elderly man's nose.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

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What did the orphan get for christmas........Cancer

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Killing your friend as a joke.

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On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, So what is the colour violet for?

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Whats better than sitting here writing anti jokes? Sitting in ENGLISH and writing anti jokes. Shoutout to Link Deas

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the black boy fail out of high school? Because his grades were bad.

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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A man walks into a bar. Then he buys a beer.

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why was the boy lonely? his whole family died in a plane crash

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What is the delicate way to start talking about your penis? ...that wasn't it.

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Pineapples have a smaller volume than the sun

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A man fuffers srom lysdexiea

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What did Helen Keller say to the leper? Buaaaaguuuhloo

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Whats 2+1? 2.

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What do you get when you mix black, white, and Asian? A panda bear

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A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

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Why did the Negro say no to the Aryan? It doesnt matter what he said! thats racist!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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