What do you call a Nazi in an airplane? Above sea level

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

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a man walks into a bar, and gets mauled by a bear..... and gets a concussion

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A man said lol, I said lol back. Then he started to beat me up for repeating his phrase!

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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Q: what is socialism? A: a terrible system

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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Knock knock Who's there? Boo Boo who? It's just a joke you don't have to cry about it

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What did Obama say to Hilary? Will you be my secretary of state?

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don't know, that's why I was asking.

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I have read and agreed to the terms of service

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Austin do your class work. Quit looking at anti-jokes. Yes you the one that goes to RRHS.

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A man and his young child walk into a clinic to get physical check-up. The man learns from the physicist he doesn't mater. His wife remarries and start having frequent sex and the child is scarred for life. This is irrelevant because both parents don't exist and this is all a constant delusion in an psychiatric hospital.

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virgenatie but he got it back

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

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Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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