The holocaust

When life gives you lemons... Be thankful you're not starving, a**hole.

What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

Who wants $300? Me too.

A Mormon walks into a bar

Camerons hair is Curly..

a man walked into a bar and said ow

Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

Wh ydo i Hate you? 'COs Your a Gimp!

Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

oops

Whats a cat? A cat!

what did charlie sheen do when his ex wife insulted him? he horribly abused her

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The colour of their skin.

Lebron James got a new iPhone, but he has to keep it on vibrate because he doesn't have any rings.

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

Why couldn't the little girl swing? She didn't have any limbs.

What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

What's black and very long? The line-up at KFC.

A Jew, an atheist, and an Asian man walk into a bar. They all have a drink and then go home to their families

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? His health was dwindling ever since he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer several years ago and this looked like the end.

Cover myself in Vaseline and cry in the dark for 4, maybe 5 hours with or without a wooden splintery dildo in my arse..”

One day Satan, approached his dad and said: DADDY I love you so much, I want to be just like you! That story did not end up so well did it?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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