A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

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what did the dead man say to the other dead man ...nothing he's dead.

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Why Do Black People Love Watermelon? Because Its A Delicious Fruit.

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what's funnier then 15? definitely not 14

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Can I have... ...a beer." The bartender asks, "What's with the large pause?" To which the bear replies, "I have... ...a speech impediment."

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Q.why was ireland takin over by the brits A.they wanted it

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why did the girl cry because she was raped

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Gustavo Andrade

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Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

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Q: What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? A: "Fred is raping your sister with a puck."

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Whats fat yellow and diabetic Brett lai lan

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How come Michael Jackson can draw a perfect circle? He likes little BOYS.

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Why did Justin Bieber wake up Lady Gaga? He needed to ask her a question.

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what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

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what's the difference between a pogo stick and a traffic cone? well for starters, traffic a cones main function is to cordon off areas or alert drivers to certain areas of road that are not to be breached and pogo sticks are used as toys to heighten bouncing. I'll stop here but the list goes on.

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how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

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Why did the pig walk into the bar Because he was thirsty

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What's long hard and black A drain pipe

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Call jets pizza at 8637090999 and say porr cisero is still stuck and shit will go down

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra in a meat grinder

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A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

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If you are on this site, you have a shitty life. It is even shittier if you read this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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