how many baby's does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

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Why did the arm-less Ben fall off the swing? Gravity

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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What's the difference between a hippopotamus? An orangutan.

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What do you call justin bieber haveing sex with a lady? A dream

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Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

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Can I touch it?

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What's black and white and red all over? A penuin that got bit by a sea lion.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Bill Walters from across the street. How are we talking through a door?

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why did the black boy fall? he had terminal cancer and couldnt stand the pain anymore he died

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A russian gives away vodka.

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Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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Why is the black guy jobless? He's 3 years old.

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Some of the people on this site who write these "jokes" are complete morons. Many of them believe that racism, sexism, and spamming is hilarious. Each one of them is a ****ing dumbass and needs to be removed from this site. Racism is not funny, people are murdered because of it! Those who think that they are being funny by insulting others need to get a life and stop ruining this site for others who want to read good jokes free of racism. Africans, Hispanics, Jews, and everyone else deserves better than to be insulted like this. And I'm a white, so take that you racist whores! I apologize for those of you who have good humor that have to read this, but those other jerks need to be told off.

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What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

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osama bin ladin is dead. let's get a beer.

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if your were a slu* what would you do dance on a pole or get a tattoo

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so....a guy is sitting on the couch looking out his living room window and a cab pulls up and honks..he says to himself, "wow that was quick, i just called for the cab 5 minutes ago!"

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

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Why did the gambler sell his house? Because he needed money to pay for male hookers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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