John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

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Roses are green Violets are grey Tulips are a lighter grey I am colorblind.

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Why couldn't the little girl see in the dark? She had no eyes.

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Two men walked into a bar, the third followed close behind.

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Cashier: Have a nice day sir! Grumpy man: Don't tell me what kind of day to have ya fruit!

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My next door neighbour found out yesterday that I am a serial killer. Knock Knock. [L]

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Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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A farmer had a horse that he rode frequently. He would talk to the horse and tell it it was his closest companion. One day the farmer noticed that the horse was walking funny. So he shot it.

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What's green and goes 100 miles an hour? a green racing car

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Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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What did the Leah say to the Pawneez? AWWWW YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

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A blind man watches TV

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Want to know whats funnier than 24? 25

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Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

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what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

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Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

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Why didn't the man buy the sportscar? He couldn't drive stick

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A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

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Where did the guy who shot his neighbor go? Jail, because he was caught, sent to court, and was convicted of murder.

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Why did the girl run across the street? Because she was being chased by a man with a knife

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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