Who more attractive then you? No one your ugly as pooh.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on the trampoline

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Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

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Ya know what's funny? A joke well-told by a professional comedian.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Two unemployed Irishmen are out looking for work when they pass a lumberyard. There's a sign outside that said "Tree Fellers Wanted". Sean turns to Patrick and says " What a curious way to write that sign. Surely the term is lumberjack?" "Yes," says Patrick "but what with the current economic situation here in Ireland, I say we get in there, apply for the jobs and hope that our lack of experience is overlooked." "Okay." Says Sean. "And let's not mention the whole sign thing." "No."

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

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So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

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- Hey, guess how many people are dead in that cemetery? - I don't know. How many? - All of them.

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What do you call a man who shoots someone? A very bad person.

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I never asked for this.

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Your mama is so stupid she has an IQ lower than an average person.

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What's rape when you shout surprise? The crime, committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with him, especially by the threat or use of violence.

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What happened when the Mexican put the Popsicles in the fridge? They melted

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-Whats this? -Anti-Jokes.. -Theyre not funny

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A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

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your mama is so fat she wears big pants.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

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A horse walks into a bar the bartender says to the horse y the long face the horse is unable to speak English, shits on the floor than leaves.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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A man walks into a bar, he now has a mild concussion

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Yo momma's so fat she went to Antartica and all the penguins were like, "Woah. You're fat."

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A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops