A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.

How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!

Bing

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

A few lice were drinking wine on a scalp. It is quite strange that a person had wine on their scalp.

A black man walks into a bank with a gun......he is a 25-year veteran SWAT team officer attempting to arrest two armed robbers that have 5 old ladies hostage.

Getting up for a black person on a buss

Q: What did the architect say after he tripped? A: My mother died of cancer when I was 6.

Q: What did the man say before he was stabbed? A: "What are you gonna do, stab me?"

if i have 2 bananas, and you have 2 bananas, then together we have 4 bananas what are the chances?

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? lts of stuff like murder, rape, slavery, poverty, mindcontrol, mass genocide, the holocaust, racism, plagarism, physichal assault, war, terrorism, massacres, onsloughts, necrophillia, the dead rising, zombies, jokes on antijokes.com, awkward situations, dieing, cancer, ADHD, other mental illnesses, paint, the grim reaper, shinigami, stereotyping foreigners, prejudicism, bullying, armed robbery, hacking, viruses, incest, feral animals, getting lost in the forest, arsonry, pyromania, passing out in a bar, meeting a serial killer, and finding 2 worms in your apple.

A one armed blond is in a tree, how to you get her to come down? You wave to her?

A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

Women's rights.

What did the duck say to the flag? NOTHING DUCKS CANT SPEAK or flags

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

A dirty joke Three white horse's are walking down a trail one falls in the mud

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...