What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

What happened in your mom's locked bedroom last night I don't know

whats red and smells like cherries red cherries

how many moms can you fit in a bathtub? as many as you want

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

What is worse then dying of testicular cancer? Living of testicular cancer and having one amputated?

What did the deaf boy get for Christmas? Something like udgtationdaidnmgf

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

Why did the chicken cross the road!? He was supposed to be dead! You are by far the most incompetent chicken assassin we've ever had. You're fired.

Roses are Red Your Face Has Turned Blue This Pillow I have Is Smothering You

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Yo momma so fat she soon became aware of her physical state and developed an eating disorder which led to her tragic death.

A black man shoots some hoops. One of the bullets bounces off the rim and hits him in the eye. The man dies. His grandmother is still alive to attend his funeral.

A man walks into a bar and a lady asks "Can I help you?" The man replies "No." and walks out of the bar.

A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no, and leaves.

why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

What did the chicken say to the dog? Well, since chickens can't talk, they both stood there in an awkward silence.

why did the Mexican fall and not the black man. i don't know, go ask the Asian.

Yeah, so I was partially right when I assumed that you joined the feds in order to make sure the past would not repeat itself huh? The underground society never broke a simple rule, a single law, it simple grew from a bunch of dopeheads, to people capable of creating nuclear weapons... Just a matter of speaking of course.

A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...