Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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how do you find will smith in the snow? with rescue dogs

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Try this on your friends and make them look dumb So a plane crashes on the border between the USA and Canada. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury the survivors.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase the farmer has recently gone blind due to old age and he acidently left the gate opened and the chicken happened to walk out

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Why a blonde woman eat vegetables? Because she is a vegetarian.

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what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

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A straight guy, a straight girl and a bisexual guy walk into a bar. The bisexual guy is twice as likely to find a partner from a purely statistical point of view.

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A jewish man runs into a wall with an erection. He broke his nose.

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Q:What is yellow and has wheels A: A banana I was joking about the wheels

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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what porn does a nugget watch nugget porn.

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What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she wasn't a woman

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Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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What's the deal with airline food? Nothin. It's quite scrumcious.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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What did Kony say to the children right before he took them Come with me you f******* n*****

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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gay marriage.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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