What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A frog in a blender

What's red and has a mask ? Blood, I lied about the mask.

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

This is a joke. Laugh!

A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

Yo momma so fat, people snicker as they walk past her, quietly laughing at a women obviously struggling with obesity. They then proceed to stop laughing, as they realize that their mother died from diabetes. They then proceed to move on with their day.

what do you get when you cross an African with a Rhinoceros? A rhinoceros.

Three kids were waiting in line at a camp. One said how long is the wait. The other two said i hope its long. They were waiting in line for the gas chambers at auchwitz

I know what makes young boys "explode" -dynamite

What did the woman say to her rapist? I've had better.

Getting an STD. What's worse than mixing up the order of the joke and the punchline?

Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

What do you call a black person who just received a bachlors degree from Havard? A very educated human being.

What happened when the child missed his school bus home? He had to take the long 6 mile walk back home and did not return until dinner time.

how many babies does it take to paint a house? that is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

A guy walks into a bar and thinks of a superlative anti-joke. After having an enjoyable time at the bar he then promptly goes home and posts it for the world to see.

what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

Whats fuzzy and greenand if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

Why is jim gay? because he likes men

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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