how many dirty stinkin apes does it take to put in a lightbulb? 3 dirty stinkin apes, 1 dirty stinkin ape to put in the lightbulb and 2 dirty stinkin apes to throw feces at each other

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What's the difference between shoes and a ginger? Shoes do the kicking.

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I only like NY as a friend.

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What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

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A man fuffers srom lysdexiea

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Why did the depressed teenager die? Because he had cancer.

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Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

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What do you call a bus full of white people? A Twinky!!!

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Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? By murdering his family.

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Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Shut up.

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Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

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What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

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What do you get when you cross a leopard with a camel? Sacked from the zoo.

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What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

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A girl and a boy where sitting on a couch together. The boy told the girl politly that she hass gained a significant amount of weight and should lose it. She then pulled out a candy bar in her back pocket and shoved it down his throat, to which he suffocated, because she was on her period when to comment was made.

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ask me if im a house are you a house? no

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*spongebob voice* 25

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what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

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What does the Post Office have in common with a shoe store? Both provide goods and services in exchange for money.

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Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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