Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

How do you know when someone tells a bad joke? You don't find it humorous.

Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

What's 9+10=? 19

In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

How many dead hookers can you fit in a trunk? Five

Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

Why can't you teach drivers ed and sex ed at the same time in Iraq? The camel would get tired.

A woman went out and had a great time with her friends. Then she walked home alone and got viciously raped by 4 large black men.

A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

Two black guys are in an elevator, one guy gets off at the sixth floor, and the other on the eighth. And thats it.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Arms and legs, NOT GET IN MY MINIVAN!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Beacuse he got kicked out of the bar

What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

Jew logic fail: Jew: We have endured suffering for thousands of years! Guy: And how old are you again? Jew: eight. Moral: If you see a goddamn moral in this one then post it yourself :P

Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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