What do you call a purple chicken eating a bicycle? A purple chicken eating a bicycle

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Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? EVERYWHERE

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There was a blonde, brunette and a red head on an island. The blond was on holiday, the brunette lived there and the red head was there on business, it was a very large and industrial island.

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What did the blind man say to the bartender? Nothing, I forgot to mention he's also mute and has no legs.

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Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

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Fun Fact: If humans stood in a single file line around the equator, most of them would drown.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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Knock, Knock Come in

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Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

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Whats worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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Q: What did the bartender say to the Arab as he was walking in? A: Nothing, the bomb had already killed them both.

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What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

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Dyslexics are teople poo

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Dat ass, or dem titties? Your choice.

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A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

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Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

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why do leprecon's laugh when they run through the grass? because it tickel's their balls

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Peter was sitting on a bench. He had a bag of 10 sweets and was eating them slowly. John and Anthony both wanted some, but Peter wanted to still have sweets left over. How many did he give them both? None. He's that selfish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops