Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because skeletons cannot live on their own and there is no such thing as a skeleton that can walk across roads without muscles.

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How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

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why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

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"What is the sound of one hand clapping?" "I'm not quite sure, but your on fire."

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squash squash who squash my ass

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Two scuba divers are playing cards on the bottom of the ocean. One asks "have you got amy threes?" Then they both die from maintained exposure to the incredible pressure at the bottom of the sea. One left behind three children.

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A blonde and a brunette nearly fell off a cliff and were hanging on for dear life. The brunette found the strength to climb back onto the ledge. The blonde was impressed and had muscular dystrophy so she lost the strength to hold on any longer and fell to her death.

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

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Roses are red Violets are penis

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How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You could stab him repeatedly with a box cutter and demand his social security number, but I wouldn't suggest it. He would most likely beat you up.

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A black man provides has a normal day job and provides for his family while staying faithful to his wife.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby tied to a tree? Everything, infant mortality is a very sad thing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. That's what she said

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What do a spoon and a platypus have in common? Nothing.

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knock knock. who's there myhairs myhairs who myhairs fallen out

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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friend 1: Alright man, i got your back friend 2: AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" Then the horse left because that question is racist to horses.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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