A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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"Hey guys lets have a standing obviation." No one else stands....

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A black man approaches a customer service desk and asks for help. He is racially discriminated and receives no help with his problem.

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What ticks like a clock and has numbers on it? A clock.

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A girl's opinion is respected.

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There was a lil girl in a red hoody skipping to her grandma's house. When she got there she noticed her grandma wasn't home. The lil girl panics and see's a wolf. She hesitates and asks the wolf "Have you seen my grandma" The wolf replies with a yes, shes in the backyard planting flowers.

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Your mom is so fat she weighs significantly higher then most females of her age and height.

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A: What time is it? B: Half past six.

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A teenage girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges on the other side completely unharmed.

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The daring man said "here goes nothing." And nothing happened. -Tag

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Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a turkey? Just a sort of mixed bird thing.

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

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Why were The Beatles so popular? People across the world enjoyed their music.

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Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo To whom is Boo?

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Whats the difference of a pile of dead babys and a lambrogini? One of them is not inside of my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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