A man walks into a bar and says "ouch."

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whats red and smells like blue paint? blue paint on the rag

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What do you get when you cross a black man and a Mexican man? I don't know.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circle and tell her to sit in the corner.

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how Sudan answered England when England's ambassador eaten by Sudanese people? Eat ours

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Whats wrong Nero? What happened? Please pick up the phone, I am trying to call you, but it just goes from dialing to changing tunes, please do not be upset with me, what did I do wrong? I thought we had an understanding, please just pick up the phone, if you already have my number and all you got nothing to lose...

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How much carlins does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

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A man walked into a bar owch

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad that this joke took your mind off your terminal cancer?

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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Why didn't the Irishman want to drink anymore? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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yo mamma's so stupid, she is not that smart.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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You know whats funny Aids

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A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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Why couldn't the old man play the piano? His arthritis caused him great pain.

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A man walks into a bar. And has a beer.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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Do you like fishsticks No

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops