Opinions are like assholes, neither one can ride a bike, except for the assholes

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Why did the boy cross the road? He was visiting his dying grandmother at the hospital.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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last night i was doing some guy in the ass. i went to give him a reach around and the homo had a boner! freakin queer.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? One is a devotee of the torah, one is a delicious meal.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A worm in your intestinal tract.

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yo mamas so fat whenever she wears a pink bathing suit people say "look at that fat lady wearing a pink bathing suit!

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! Wrong. What doesn't kill you could leave you in a parapledgic state.

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A dyslexic pervert asks to see a woman's bar. Then he is chased to the bra next door.

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

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What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

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How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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whats worse then finding a worn in your apple the holocaust whats worse then the holocaust two worms in your apple

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What's black and white and red all over? A dying zebra.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What's sad about four children going over a cliff in a car ? Four children just went over a cliff in a car.

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vatalk you are retarded!!!!!

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PSP... Is a cat... you can throw against the wall.

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What's the difference between a black preist and a white priest? the color of their skin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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