chuck norris is a little b|tch

-Doctor! Scientists in California have enough proofs to demonstrate that the Christian religion is false. -Oh my God!

Y R U A B? I don't know why I am a bee.

Why was the mexican dead? Because he overdosed on Methamphetamine.

Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

Whats the best way to tell if your wife has been cheating on you with the UPS guy? simply ask her, trust and communication in relationships are vital in their survival and growth.

A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

-Knock Knock - no one respond , they were brutally murdered by a drug addict.

knock, knock who's there? I'm here to kill u! I'm here to kill u who? .......

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

knock, knock Sho'sthere? Sam who? Sam Butt

What did Batman tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

Whats worse then failing ur English test? Getting hit by a train

Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

Skrillex.

What did the man say after falling off a bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

how do u kill a black kid ..... stabb him in the face with a nife

What did the Chicken say to the Interviewer Interviewer: how do you feel about your eggs chicken: the eggs are actually my periods. Interviewer: how do you feel about your periods ChicKen: you eat my periods everyday. people make cakes, omlettes and all these food out of my period. Imagine the world running on your period. Interviewer: what are your feelings on your periods Chicken: I have a mixture of feelings. i feel really scared because the farmers would kill me if i can have my periods. i feel glorified because the world runs on my eggs and i feel proud. I feel freaked out because the world actualy runs on my periods

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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