why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Why don't midgets live in penthouses? They can't reach the button in the elevator.

Knock, knock. Who's there? No one. You have no friends.

What starts with p and ends in orn? Popcorn

Why did the cop stop a black guy with a Rolls-Royce? Because he was speeding while on his phone and going through red traffic lights.

If yesterday was friday, today is saturday, what day is it tomorrow? sunday

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't because he wasn't capable of having emotions after he fell into a coma and died 10 months ago after a severe car crash involving a drunk driver. The believed driver,3 had a blood alcohol of .26 and rear ended 6's car at 60 mph. 3 was uninjured and promptly arrested but....6 wasn't so lucky. The doctors said there was no chance of him coming back and they pulled the plug.He was only 9 days away from his 32nd birthday. The funeral was held shortly after, 7 seemed the most upset and couldn't hold back the tears well enough to make it through the whole service. The family is now forever scarred. In Loving Memory of 6 February 22,1982-February 13,2014 Loving father, Caring husband, Forever in our hearts

What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

Penis!

What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

I am awesome, you are not, i am awesome, you smoke pot!

There are too many people in this bar, a man says. He then walks out of the bar and proceeds to visit his grandmother. Orange.

Hey Caleb.

what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

My jeans

Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

What did the mormon say when he complemented the gay person? Nothing, because mormons hate gays.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh

The adventures of HAROLD THE MONGOOSE: Harry dug a hole. He did not like that hole so he dug a new one. He liked that hole so he did not dig another one. Harry slept on a rock. He did not like that rock. So he smashed it with a ham. Harry found a new rock. He liked that rock so he didn't smash it with a ham. Harry ate a snake. He did not like that snake so he regurgitated it. Harry ate another snake. He liked that snake so he did not regurgitate it. Harry encountered a bush. He did not like that bush. Unfourtianately for Harry, that Bush became president.

How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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