What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

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There are three muffins sitting in an oven. The first one says nothing. The second one also says nothing. They're just muffins and muffins can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

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How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

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You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

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what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

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This is an anti-anti-joke.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

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It's all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits.

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Whiney the poo and the blustery day.

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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What have you got there? Hitler's gas bill... Oh.. don't show him that, he'll be furious Whys that? He can't read.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs in the ocean? Dead.

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

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Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

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What did John name his dog? Doggy

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Hey have you seen Stevie wonders house? No? Don't worry he has'nt either.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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