Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

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If you have a large penis.give this joke a thumbs up. ( :

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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so there was a frog a bear and a walrus... i forgot how the rest goes but they all die because of a nuclear holocaust

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What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

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What is worse than 20 black men stealing your TV? Having your family die in tragic car accident.

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why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

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Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses walk into a bar and sit down at a table. They glare at each other for a moment before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

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Your mother is so fat, that she was instructed by her doctor to go on a low carbohydrate, high protein diet to reduce the risk of heart disease later in life.

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Jerry Sandusky walks up to the reception desk at a day care center. What does the lady at the desk say? Nothing, she promptly gives Mr. Sandusky his son and they leave.

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Two reporters walk into Tah rir Square. Both are abused and that's sad.

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Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

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What did the cancer patient do during Willow Smith's "Whip My Hair"? -Nothing.

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The size of Idris Elba's penis

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A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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How come the bartender didnt let the black guys in the bar Because the bar was closed.noone was aloud in the bar

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I just flew in from Seattle, and boy is their airport difficult to navigate.

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What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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Whats has 6 wheels and can fly? A dumpster, I lied about the flying.

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Frontbut-

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What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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