a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

thumb_up thumb_down +48

When is a clown happy? At a child's birthday party.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Two fish are in a tank. One is driving, the other is operating the gun. Two soldiers are in a tank. They both drown.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A dog walks into a bar. He asks for a drink in perfect english. People scream at the dog's ability to talk and scientists burt in and take the dog to dissect and study his brain, vocal chords, and dna.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except it didn't work for the boy with ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down

Two Christians are on their way to church. They stay for prayers and have a lovely lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what happend when the little boy went on the rollercoaster ? It crashed.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's the difference between a large pizza and a Mexican? A large pizza can feed a family.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your Fallopian tubes ripped out by wolverine

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worse than a man with AIDS? The fact that this is considered a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what is the difference between jelly and jam? jelly is smoother where jam has chunks of fruit in it...... and i cant jelly my penis down your throat

thumb_up thumb_down -37

How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is Corey Jacobs favorite kind of sandwich? Big Jumbo Kahona Burger!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A duck walks into the bar, buys a beer, steals your woman, wins a bar fight, pistol whips a police officer, departs and shouts Aflac

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A Japanese woman walks into a Korean deli, and asks the Korean man if she can buy some groceries. They are able to get past their cultural differences, and share their favorite recipes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the wife get her husband after they had intercourse? A sandwich, because she loved him and knew he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What did the gay man say to the other gay man? I like guys... cause I'm gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Two friends that are 11 years old are fighting with each other, and one of them says, " Shut the front door." The other friend replies, "We don't even have a front door, because we're both homeless, and we're never going to be adopted because we're on an island, that's how we became friends in the first place."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the guy get hit by a bus? He walked out into traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops