Three blind men walk into a bar, and, no... wait, sorry just one; so one blind man walked into a bar, and... uh, okay, so it was actually more of a small post. This is pretty much just a plausible, yet unfortunate event. My bad.

Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

What happens when you catch a cold? You sneeze whenever you stand up.

Why did the kid drop his ice-cream? Because he tripped on a dead guy!

Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

Whats plastic and phonie a phone

An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

- How can you call a person, who hasn't got a left eye, a left hand and a left leg? - All right.

Knock knock Who there? A mute Bullshit

Society.

your mammas so poor she is probably going die in a few days of starvation

Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

It's a scientific fact that if you took all the veins out of your body, and lined them up end to end, you would die.

What did the unicorn say when he was kicked out of the grocery store? Nothing, dodo birds dont exist

why was the frog sad..... because it had a science lesson with the year 10s about the insides of animals

What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Ferrari? I have a bag of dead babies in my garage.

A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

A baby seal walks into a club.

what do you call a black man being hung from a tree? -prejudice

Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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