What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

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Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

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Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

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Q: What do you call a black woman who can't tell you who her baby daddy is? A: "Mam". Rape is a serious and painful crime, and the strength to raise a child on her own without her consent is worthy of respect.

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Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

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Knock Knock, Whos there? a baby nailed to the wall Orgasim

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Why did the bus driver lose his family in a car accident? Bc the little boy was seeking revenge

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Whats better then a guard llama two Guard llamas

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whats worse than school...wait a minute?

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Someone said you sound like an owl Who?

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What happens when you shoot chuck norris? he dies

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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A three-legged prostitute, a coal miner, and R. Kelly walk into an all-midget rendition of Stravinsky's Rite of Spring. The miner has a heart attack and dies. The concubine and the vocalist do nothing to help.

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why was the blonde confused? because she was born with a low IQ making her mentally retarded.

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"Knock Knock" "You know the doorbell is working?" "Oh, well, you know I'm here now. May I come in?" "Yes, have a cup of tea"

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Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a dog, Meow.

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What would happen if you threw 50 plates off of your roof? Nothing. No one in their right mind would do that. Besides, who owns 50 plates?

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Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

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What do get when you mix cancer and a bike? Lance Armstrong

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The grass is always greener on the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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