Why did the boy kill his father? Because he was molesting him.

That long? I was thinking more like two hours? An hour?

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

What do you call an unexpected pregnancy? A defective condom.

How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

who do we all like george goodburn

Billy Cundiff.

Christopher Reeves walks into a bar.

A Jew, a Mexican, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Bartender says: "Get the f*ck out."

What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

How did little Sally break her Nintendo DS? Her abusive father repeatedly abused her and punished her until she was thrown into a stone wall. As she went into the wall she crushed by another wall and broke the DS.

. pussy . I don't get it ? .of course you don't

Two gorillas swing into a bar and are promptly escorted out because the gorillas are alcoholics.

A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

What did the penis say to the other penis? What? Penis motherbucker

Hey, there are 206 bones in the human body, would you like 1 more? ;) If you are referring to your penis, that is made of tissue, so it is not an extra bone. And no, I would not like your penis.

Whats bigger than a tuba? the universe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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