What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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You: Mike and Steve were playing chess, who won? Them: Mike You: no, it was steve

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A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

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Q: What do you call a cow wearing a hat? A: A cow wearing a hat.

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How do you call a hispanic man crossing the border? First you must find out his phone number, then using a different phone make a phone call to him.

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

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What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

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So these two girls have a cup .

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what du u call a aplle raisni in the hotr sun? graep duahahahahahahejejejejejejahahahejejejwyan

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why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

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if you dont like sponge bob refrences.......... THEN **DOLPHIN NOISE*** you

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What's red, blue, and purple? purple.

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Yo momma is so stupid that the only test she passed was the mental retardation test.

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Roses are red violets are blue if you were number one I"ll pick number two, if you were number two then I'll pick POO!

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There's an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman. They are all trapped in a jail cell. Eventually they all starved to death.

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scientology.

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Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

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What's worse than someone posting a number on antijoke ? Someone posting about what's worse than the holocaust

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i googled who gives a fuck my name wasn't in the results

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What happened to the vegetarian when he tried outdoor survival He died due to lack of energy because of his refusal to eat meat and or any living substance

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Boy: Will you go out with me? Girl: No. Boy: Why? Girl: Because I don't want to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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