Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

SEX

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

I'd like to make this joke funnier but I can't. It's stupid. I don't even like it.

A horse walked into a bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse then replied, "Well my wife is dying of cancer, my mother is a drug addict, and my two kids are in the hospital for 3rd degree burns."

knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

Why did the black man smell really bad? A: becuase he ran out of paper

What do you call a shattered lightbulb? A hazard that should be taken very seriously.

roses is red violet is blue i will smack you

Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he wanted to impress his wife.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

How do you throw a party in space? You planet!

Women's rights.

Whats the easiest way to kill a blonde? Shoot her

Q: What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he didn't make it that far

when life knocks you down you don't do anything because life is a mental concept that does not have the ability to knock you down since it doesn't have a physical bodie

Q. What does FIAT stand for? A. Frenzied Italian At Traffic-lights.

Do you like waffles yeah we like waffles do you like pancakes do you like french toast yeah we like french toast dododododod let me get a mouth full. WAFFLES!!!!!!!

What's worse than the Holocaust? Getting raped..

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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