A muslim, a jew, and a black man jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? They all hit the ground at the same time because gravity pulls all objects at the same rate regardless of their mass.

How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

Q: Imagine you are driving a boat, and the wheel falls off. So how many pancakes can you fit in that box? A: None, because the oranges couldn't talk.

Bob: This joke is so hilarious but you must start off by saying knock knock. Tom: okay... Knock knock Bob: who's there? Tom: ...... Bob: well? Tom: I don't know what to say??? Bob: so the joke left ya speechless!

why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

Why did the genie not grant the man his 3 wishes? Genies don't exist, only vampires live in lamps.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Oh, I thought you could tell me. I will ask someone else. See you later.

How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

why did the boy die he had a raging case of cardiovascular disease

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The horse, being unable to understand the barman, breaks a table and shits on the floor.

Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

q ggggggggggggggggg

whats round and like a ball a ball

So i was walking down the street and this guy was really excited. I said "what is so Exciting?" He said "i just saw Justin bieber kiss a girl."

What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? I don't know, I don't have a watch anymore.

A child rides by his mother on his bicycle and says "Look Mom, no hands!" The child doesn't come back, and night falls but he has yet to come home. His mother calls the police and a search begins 2 days later. He is never found is presumed dead.

"Want to hear a joke? Tough."

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms. They were lost in a tractor accident.

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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