Why did the Octopus jump off the bridge? To breathe

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What's the difference between basketball and an elephant? One's a sport and one's a large African animal.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I'm going to live to be 300 years old or die trying!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The awkward moment when you don't know whether to like or dislike this because you think I want like so you are gonna dislike but what If I want dislikes, but what if I want likes, you are confused Antijokeception....

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Julia fall of the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Julia.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Winter

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Terry Stockton wasn't really hit.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

On her day off, a fully clothed stripper walks into a bar she's never been to before. The regulars turn their heads to see who has just walked in, then turn back to their own conversations.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I am a real homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why are asians so good at maths? Because their culture exercises a hard work ethic in order for many of them to achieve high ranking jobs in order to support their families

thumb_up thumb_down

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because last year, when 6 was going to the gas station, 7 approached him and said "gimme all your money or else I'll shoot you". 6 was so scared he ran away crying. About a few days later 6 spots 7 again and this time he was with 9. He said "yo 6! If you don't give me your money, im gonna do this to you!" and then 7 started biting and chewing 9 as if he was some kind of cannibal. 6 ran away and called the police. He told him that 7 ate 9.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

There are four black people near each other ? KITKAT !!! :D

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a blonde girl gets behind the wheel of a car. and drives to her community college for her morning class

thumb_up thumb_down -22

just imagine like a whole dad no imagine like 1000 dads an army of dads ready to conquer

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops