roses are grey violets are grey so says my color blind cousin

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what is long hard and full of seamen......... A sumbirine..........................(what were you thinking)

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what do you call two indian men lying next to each other? i dont think there is a name for it but im sure you call them by there names.

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if i'm white and you're white, then who took my car keys?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Child Protection Services. ...............

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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whats it called when a pimp slaps a ho? RESPECT

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how do u get a blonde to stay away from her credit card... i dont know im blonde

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Moralman... Seriously man, take it easy, my name is Nero, yes I play dual identities sometimes, it is only in order to convey my hidden messages to my people. I am deeply sorry to admit that those that assaulted you where indeed from my order, they have been prosecuted by the law and excluded from our order.

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Q. Why did billy die? A. Becuase everyone dies in life

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What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind and is a women, who are notoriously bad drivers.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

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"The only thing worse than being talked about is getting AIDS." -Oscar Wilde

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- My grand mother died. - I'm sorry.... Did She died of old age ? - No, she got eaten by a giant worm.

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Q: What did the diddler say to the little boy? A: Can i touch you inappropriately?

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The queen is killed on sunday there are three suspects the cheif the princess and the butler The princess' said she was getting lunch The cheif said he was making lunch The butler said je was getting the mail So who did it A: the butler they dont diliever mail on sunday

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Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

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Why don't women know how to drive a car? Because there are no roads between the kitchen and the bedroom.

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What's worse than finding a Holocaust in your apple? The worm

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Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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