Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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whats black, dirty, and full of trash? A trash can

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Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

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How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

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Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? DeShawn

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A guy says a joke. It was not funny

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Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

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A girl that had Malaria couldn't play with her friends, whys this? She died.

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There is this dylectic who can't spell.

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Why did the dog lick the boy's leg? Cause when the boy blew up his leg landed in the doghouse

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Man #1: What was the hardest part about watching that kid get hit by that bus? Man #2: My dick...

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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In Soviet Russia, everyone leads a perfectly normal life.

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biggest lie in the world. I love you grandma.

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Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

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What never seems to get old? AIDS.

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What's white and sticky? A glue stick.

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mitt romney

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What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

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Q: What is Paul's nickname A: His name is Paul, he doesn't need a nickname

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Nobody likes you ya noob! (-_-) *sniff* MAN YOU SMELL BAD

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Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

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What's a thither? My sister with a lisp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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