So a guy with ADD walks into a... Hey Look! A Chicken!

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Roses are red Violets are blue And so does your mom…

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Why did the chicken cros- oh he got hit by a car.

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What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

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scenario: retarded monkey upside down in a mirror question: why is jims dad fat answer: the mexican chicken is an aperadus

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

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Knock knock! Just kidding.

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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it was a black guy a white guy a chinese guy a french guy an arab guy an irish guy and a juncky that was too much for a joke

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

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Hickory Dickory Dock, your mother is a whore

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Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

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why didn't your dog come home last cause he died

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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Want to hear a tough toung twister? spoons

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops