- Anti Joke

Whats the difference between a muslim and a christian? They believe in different things.

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

Wumbo

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

What do you call a Jew in Harlem? It depends on what his name is. I advise procuring a polite introduction from a mutual acquaintance.

there is a black guy riding a bicycle. he is extremely skilled on it and says he has never fallen off.

Why couldn't the surgeon perform surgery? Because he was in court being sued due to the fact that he administered too much anesthesia to a patient, who later died of overdose..

Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

A man walked into a bar. He stayed for a bit and had a good time.

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Where did the taxi driver put his suitcase down? celery

How did Jimmy get into the R movie? He bought a ticket.

Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

Yo mamma so fat that when she gets in bed she gets sleepy

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

Why did the man jump out of the plane? Because the plane was losing fuel fast so he grabbed a parachute and went for it and realized that was the only one left so everyone died a horrible death.

Dont be mean Dyslexics are teople poo

What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

Whats black,White and Asian? everything we are all equal

What did the blond say when she got into a car crash? Nothing, she died.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

roses are red violets are twisted turn around bitch your about to get fisted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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