What is the difference between a mustache, and a pile of dead babies? Mustaches disgust me.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

can you pass the soap?

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

why do pedo's molest children? because it feels really good.

Okay, I just really want you to trust me again,

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

how Sudan answered England when England's ambassador eaten by Sudanese people? Eat ours

Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head? A: An ambulance.

Your mom is so hot your daddy married her and they lived happily ever after

When geese fly south, why is one side of the V usually longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

it was 3 am in the morning and i was stopped by 2 black men in an alley. we said hey to eachother and went along

What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

Why do cats burp quietly, because they aren't men

Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

What's worse than finding out your husbands gay...........finding out he's gay with your brother"

What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common ? They are sports , except the Holocaust .

whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

Why'd the Squirrel fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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