knock knock! who's there? a fat salesperson here to deliver your supplements

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Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

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Cripples are lame.

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What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

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A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

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Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

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How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy on the road? there is skid marks leading up to the dog.

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There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

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Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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So a boy walks into a bar. He broke his arm and now is severly crippled

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what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

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A: what does hellen keller say to her mom? B: nothing. she cant speak due to her lack of hearing and visualizing

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Yo Mama so slow She can't run very fast.

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Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

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Why don't women know how to drive a car? Because there are no roads between the kitchen and the bedroom.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A fly.

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knock knock whos there knock knock whos there knock knock whos there poor billy didnt know that the knocking was just a tree branch and he stayed asking the same question for 21 years

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Nah, its fine, I just went to get a popsicle, and its square, so don't get any ideas. Honestly? When I first met "some jerk" calling himself Nero here, I began calling myself Nero, because I thought that the jerk that turned out to be you, Nero himself, sigh. was screwing over his own reputation. But now I realize that what makes you who you are, is that you say whats on your mind without going "oh no what will others think about me, what if this or that happens", you accept yourself for who you are, and if the rest do not, well screw them right? As you told me at first and proved to me during our conversations, you respect and value individuality and integrity. And well, you are a guy, you think like a guy (I honestly dont think we girls think that differently, we are simply socially indoctrinated or "engineered" in order to think that we do), I mean let me say something really honest here. Nero, I only dare say this once, so take me seriously I really want you to fuck me, and yeah, I may say that when we meet too, considering I have not even said it yet, just in my head... Anyway, its not something I am insecure about nor ever was and blahblahblah, the end, oh, and yeah, I really want and need a friend like you.

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Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? A: A bus stop

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs and died? Because he had a stroke and never got life alert!

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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What did the hispanic man say to the black man? I don't know, if I was listening to their conversation, the would be creepy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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