Q. How do you punish Helen Keller? A. Rearrange the furniture in her room

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Artichoke is a vegetable state induced by swallowing paint

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because he was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -29

whats 7+4? 74

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a woman outside of the kitchen? Out of place.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? when people don't understand the concept of anti-jokes and post real jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -2

wats green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, it would kill u? a pool table

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Roses are white Violets are black I'm colorblind That is sad

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black man laugh at my joke? k.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's black and white and red all over? A plague victim.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what do you get when you stick a pair of scissors in a four year old? an erection.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,273

Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did one orphan say to the other? My parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +305

Why can't Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why is America such a great place to live? It's not North Korea.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

q

thumb_up thumb_down -18

In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

pobody's nerfect

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your mom is so fat That the salesman advised her not to buy the tight dress

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops