How do you catch a predator? You throw a beartrap at a child.

I'm an old man with Alzheimer's. Ok I'm going to tell you a little story. Well i was walking down the road bout 36 sum odd years ago and the next thing i knew i was........... Hmmm.... i wonder whats in the fridge...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

Wow! I've seen this joke before!

What do u call old black people in a shed? antique farm equiptment

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

Knock knock. Who’s there? Your son. Your son who? DAD WHY CAN’T YOU ACCEPT THE FACT THAT I AM GAY!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

A bold man said "well, here goes nothing!" Moments later, thats what happened

what did the lamp say to the hand? You turn me on

i found the cure to cancer.......AIDS

Roses are red... Violets are blue... Unless your colour blind.

Crime doesn't pay. Sure it does

RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

What do you call a limbless woman on a beach? Sandy

If you're having Kony problems, I feel bad for you son. He's stolen 99 kids and your posters saved none.

Why was the squirrel late for work? Because the traffic was nuts!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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