- Hey, guess how many people are dead in that cemetery? - I don't know. How many? - All of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a man without any money? Broke.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A guy walks into a bar Many people gather around him to see if he is alright and to tell him he needs to watch where he is going.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

2 men shot up a morgue, 16 bodies remain dead

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did chuck norris walk on water? because he's chuck norris

thumb_up thumb_down

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the black basketball player say to the white basketball player when he lost? Good game.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person you are seeking is deaf and cannot hear the sound that is made when your knuckles come in contact with the door. Try calling next time..........

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happens if you fell off a 600 foot cliff? You die.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock Who's there? Ada! Ada who? Ada burger for lunch!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

knock knock who's there? The police your family is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

thumb_up thumb_down +5

an ant walks into my aunt.... the ant took a dump

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Three baby seals walk into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what do you call a girl with no arms and legs whatever her name is

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops