What did Batman tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

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How long does it take to build a wall? it depends on how big he wall is

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

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A British man walks into a dentist's office.

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why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

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Why was the little kid sad at a funeral. He was actually happy and he was at six flags

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Why did the man walk into a bar? Coz he felt like it.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms or legs.

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Why did the black man jump off a cliff? He's been emotionally unstable ever since he witnessed the brutal murder of his parents as a child and could no longer live with himself, so he decided to commit suicide.

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A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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A student exclaimed "This test is a piece of cake!" He ate it.

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What is worse than adolf hitler? Justin beiber

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How much does a Polar Bear weigh? Approximately 500 lbs

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I am.

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Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

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How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

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What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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That's funnier than a zebra climbing the Eiffel tower with Bill Clinton on the 4th night of quanza

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Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? Here is the answer: A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? Here, in this case, with design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process. ------ Nothing to see here, end of the joke. :)

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What did the girl say to the mute? "Why are you so quiet?" How did the mute respond? He flipped her off.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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