A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

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Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

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why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

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why is 6 afraid of 7?? because 7 8 9

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what did one dinosaur say to the other? "rawr"

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Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

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Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

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How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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Hello everyone, if you couldnt tell, the most popular joke was removed because it wasnt even an antijoke, if you have a joke that isnt an antijoke, post it somewhere else, if you dont know what an antijoke even is then get the f*ck out, thumbs up if you agree with me

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What did the (real) wrestler say to the U.F.C guy? Probably something nice because most U.F.C fighters were wrestlers.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

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I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

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Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

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What do you get when you cross rice flour,vegetable oil,corn oil,cottonseed oil,soybean oil,dried potatoes,corn flour,maltodextrin,wheat starch,modified rice starch,sugar and mono-and-di-glycerides,malted barley flour,wheat bran,dried black beans and salt? Pringles,Multi Grain,truly original

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? Nickleback.

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Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

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Did you know that if you took all the elephants on earth and lined them up in space, that all the elephants would die???

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The man from Poland was so dumb he was eligible to live in a supervised group home.

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Why did the Mexican jump the American border? Because he wanted a better paying job to support his family, and legal immagration to the States is a lengthy and highly difficult process.

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Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

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Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your friend, George. Oh hi George, I'll be there in a sec.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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