What happens when you shoot Chuck Norris? You go to jail.

james schmitt whats your last name

Joke- Blah Blah Blah, punch line -LOL -Shut the hell up

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

A Muslim blows up a bar

jsahgfvdjfhgdehv? oiyduhgfdushy

The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

What's worse than biting into a worm and finding an apple? Why would you bite into a worm?

A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

What did the lamp say to the pencil? Nothing. Lamps and pencils are inanimate objects and are also non sentient so therefore are incapable of talking or listening or having any emotions.

Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

Q: what do you call obama A:a dumbass

Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

All these jokes are very entertaining, but if you look closely, Lebron clearly travels. Wheres the call ref what the hell.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

What do you call a chicken who crosses a road? Nothing, its still a chicken

the horse walks into the bar the bartender calls the pet control

Q. A couple went on a boat. The boat sank. Every single person died, who survied? A. The couple.

how many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? usually one but depending on the severity of the patients' case the lightbulb will be changed by a person who is willing to offer their assistance as to prevent any form of accident taking place.

knock knock? who's there.......... MEEEE :D hehe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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