What do you say to a man who isnt funny You're not fuuny

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

thumb_up thumb_down +64

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the todler fall over? He's an iraqi child and has ben shot inboth legs being readied fro public excution for fighting on the opposing side a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

thumb_up thumb_down +24

5

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, vilotes are blue Erics a dick and Chase is too.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What comes after 69? mouthwash

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A duck walks into a bar and the bartender says"What do u want?" The ducks replays "EVERY DAY IM SHUFFLING!!!" The bartender slaps the duck in its face and quid his job. The bar has a hard time finding a replacement and his business dies. THE END

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the Vampire say to the pastor? Nothing. You have to be real to talk

thumb_up thumb_down -1

You know what's wrong with Oprah? Generally nothing. She's a well-respected African American woman who happens to be quite wealthy and likes to share her wealth with other people.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did little Katie fall off her bike? Because the postman killed the bee hive.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

96 there mad at each other instead its 69

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the worm say to the butterfly? Nothing, worms don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

did you hear about the dyslexic journalist? he employed an assistant to double check his work. They worked really well together.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what is similar between a mexican and a bench? they are both illeageal. except the bench

thumb_up thumb_down

you know what they say... hydrate or die

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I tried frying some fish today, and it started sizzling at me. I took it as a direct threat and started yelling at the stove. Eventually it stopped and dinner was ruined, but I was proud of myself for winning.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Gustavo Andrade

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops