Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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You're so sweet I have diabetes

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Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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What's faster a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk.

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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? She got kicked in the face by a mule.

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Why did the Asian Kid pass his test? He studied hard.

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why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

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They say laughter is the best medicine but i've always found it hard to laugh at cancer.

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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A man walks into a bar Then another man shoots him in the head because he has anger issues.

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Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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A girlfriend told her boyfriend it soaked all the way through. She screwed up their art project.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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What did the crowd do when a lion walked into the bar? Got up and left because they realized the potential danger of the situation.

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72

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Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? Because they are delicious, and very filling.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

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what do u call 2 puerto rician men playing basketball? won on won

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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