How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

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What dies but was never living? The hopes and dreams of small children.

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matt is fat

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High school is like forced anal sex, Hard, painful, and you cry your hopes and dreams at the end of it all.

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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Why didn't the Mexican have car insurance? Because he was 12 years old and didn't have a car so he had no need for car insurance.

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How many pieces of gum are in 5 gum? 5. i meen 7

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Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

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What do you call a black man riding a bicycle? A good citizen who cares about the environment.

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Whats funny about the Holocaust? Absolutely nothing considering millions of people perished and you people think its funny!

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Why was Helen Keller a terrible driver? She was a woman.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

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What's worse than someone who isn't racist? A racist.

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what does wtf stand for? what? i was asking you!

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BALLS! said the Queen if i had them i would be King

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Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He was in a terrible car crash in which the fuel tank exploded.

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if a chcken lays an eggg what happens? a baby bird comes out

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what's the difference between a duck?

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A dyslexic Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. He hits his head on it and is rushed to the hospital,only to discover the floor drenched in triceratops shit.

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Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

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whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

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PLEASE HELP IM TRAPPED IN SOME GUYS HOUSE PLEASE SOMEBODY HAS TO SEE THIS IF I TEXT HE WILL SEE IT IM AT

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why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops