Why did the deaf man take his parrot to work? He was weird.

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Why did brad pay the sexy looking librarian with a big smile on his face? Becouse brad returned his books to late and had to pay a fine for that. The librarian made a joke about the fact that it was a waste of money to return the books late.

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Man: Would you like to see someone Man 2: Sure Man: How bout the inside of an ambulance

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A horse walks into a bar... The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have testicular cancer........"

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What's the only thing more horrible than trash can full of dead babies? A live one at the bottom. What's more horrible than that? He has to eat his way out. What's more horrible than that? He goes back for more. What's more horrible than that? This all took place in my garage while I was watching.

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A captain crashes his boat into a rock. He has the option to save to save his wife or his best friend. He saves neither and drowns.

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Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

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How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

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A daring man proclaimed "Well, here goes nothing!" And nothing happened.

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How do you blind fold an asian? Dental floss!

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What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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What did the Sony guy say when he hit the golf ball? PS FOUR!

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A man tells his wife to leave the kitchen

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What did the little boy get for christimas? Nothing because he's a selfish asshole.

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Bride: "He went to Jared's!!! Ex: "But every Kiss Begins with Kay...."

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What do you call a black man on a bike? A hard-working individual who found a steady job and earned enough money to buy a bicycle of his own which he rides to and from his job because he is healthy, doesn't like to waste money on gas, and doesn't like the pollution automobiles put into the air.

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What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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