Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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What do you call a man who is dirty, and is searching through a pile of garbage? A man who threw out his divorce papers.

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The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

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Hot Lady: What do you do for a living? Guy: Phosphorus, Oxygen, and Radon. Hot Lady: So you are a chemist? Guy: Think again! Think about Acronyms... Hot Lady: OPRa, so Opera correct? Guy: (Obviously talking to a Blonde) P, O, Rn Hot Lady: So, you are a chemistry teacher! Guy: (Sighs to himself thinking how PORn relates to chemistry. Which it does in biochemistry, but he does not know that).

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What do you call a man hit by a bus? Dead

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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what do you call a black priest? holy shit!

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whats more annoying than being raped by a giant scorpian? finding out that half the anti-jokes are terrible

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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What's not funny? Today's anti-joke writers

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"This is what kind of fail class?" "AN EPIC FAIL!"

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

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roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

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Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

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What's red,little and its in the corner??? --- Strawberry in the corner

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Q: Whats funnier than Ryan Vallee? A: The death of your family -RDV

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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Two cannibals are eating a clown one turns to the other and asks "does this taste funny to you?" The other cannibal says " yeah because the clown has been dead for weeks."

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Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS darragh hamilton

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Little Timmy walks up to the teacher during class and asks "Can i use the restroom?" The teacher says "I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy says "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

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guess what? chicken butt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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