What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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Q. How many people use MySpace? A. Pfft who uses MySpace

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A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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What type of vision does an Asian person have? 0-0 because he is blind

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a grasshopper walks into a bar the bartender says hey we have a drink named after you the grasshopper says what dave?

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Yo mama so fat that when she goes to the movies she sits next to everybody.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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An Aussie, a Mexican and an Asian walk into a bra. You read that wrong.

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Why did the frog cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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:O + :P = 69

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Turns out he was needed immediately at a business meeting.

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere. -Tag

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did Alice cross the road? Because she wasn't funny. At all. So the people on the other side of the road asked her to do so.

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What do you give hobos? Febreeze

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Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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Destiny was calling me, so I picked up the phone.

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Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops