Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!?

Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

where's mom I killed her

What's black and white and red all over? A nun that was stabbed to death.

Jesse gets back at people who takes his job, by trying to get with their sloppy seconds.. Emphasize trying.

why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

Where was little Sara when the bomb went off? Everywhere. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" Sara's hands

A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

your face

So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

Why did Rainey fall off the swing? She had no hair.

What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A:porn

A blonde, brunette, brown walk into a hair salon. They then proceed to each get they're own procedures done then leave not having any contact with each other.

What do 2 arabs say to each other in a super-market? For those of you who don't know your history, the true Lebanese are Phonecians. As such, they are not Ishmaelites/Arabs. They are from the house of Jaffeth. the youngest of Noah's sons. Arabs are from the house of Shem (i.e., Shemites/Semites), the oldest of Noah's sons, and Hamm, Noah's middle son who fathered Cannah with his mother. Haggar, the woman with whom Abraham fathered Ishmael, was a Cannonite. As such, Ishmael, the father of the Arabs, is half Semetic and half Hammetic. The true Lebanese are neither. Furthermore, the first non-Jewish Christian church was established with the Gentiles (the children of Jaffeth) in Lebanon. And then the shop blew up.

Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

Q: What's white, sticky, and is swallowed by most women? A: Ice Cream

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

Why did Timmy lose the race? He had no legs

What's black, white and red and can't turn round in corridors? A nun with a spear through her head

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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