I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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What is the last digit of Pi? Pi is an infinite decimal sequence, and therefore has no last number, but if it did, it would presumably be somewhere from 0-9.

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Why was there a lion in the bathroom? Because I threw a refrigerator at it and stapled a frog to its butthole, all while it was being chased by a 10 foot scorpion and a purple salmon that only had 1 eye.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not doing your Webtime on a Friday!!

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MILLERS FUNNY LIKE A JEW

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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Do you know what paper I get?.... Loose leaf :o

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What did taxi driver say to the passenger? Where to, sir?

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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-Is this the Krusty Krab? -Yes, how can I help you?

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Why couldn't the baby boy read the book? He had eye cancer and was therefore blind.

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how do you fit 20 babies into a bucket? you put them into a blender. how do you get them out? chips.

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your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.. knock, knock who's there? not suzie

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I avhe dyiaexls.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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What's the difference between a plumber and a husband? Both fuck the same women when the other is away.

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What do you call it wen black people are sky diving? ...Night

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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Q: What do you get when you put a boy and a girl together in a locked room? A: Blood and gore.

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roses are black your mamas white i didnt mean to say it but it's right

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How do you stop a air plane? You throw small infants into the turbine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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