Why did they chicken cross the road? It didn't. A van ran it over when it was halfway across.

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Bob goes swimming in the ocean. Due to the fact that his father sexually abused him as a child, and never taught him how to swim, he drowns.

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Why did the boy have sex with his grandpa? His grandpa is a nice guy and it was his birthday.

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what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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Simba was moving slow,so I told him to MUFASA!!!

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What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

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A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Pokemon pencil!!! A Pokemon pencil who? I just found a Pokemon pencil next to my computer when I was playing pokemon!!! LMFAO!

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how many horses does it take to piss on a cat 17 beccause rape isnt real in somalia

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what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

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A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

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How you know that you are flying with a "no frills" airline? There are no meals or films provided, no orange juice to drink during ascent and descent and no mid-flight shop service.

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I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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Yo momma is so old that she will be moved to a nursing home next week.

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Q : What is the similarity between me and my friend? A : We both are crazy

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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4 people: A pilot, Bill Gates, the Pope, and a little kid, are all on an airplane with only 3 parachutes, when the plane's engine explodes and starts to go down. But the pilot makes an emergency landing at a nearby airport and everybody is okay.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, well at least they were, until I met you!

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Debating on internet is like competing in the paralympics, even if you win you're still retarded

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a fish swimming in the water swims

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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