Why does Spongebob go to work? Because he's ready.

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Q: What did Tommy do when it was time to go to bed? A: Go to bed. Q:What did Tommy do when it was time to wake up? A: Kill him self.

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Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

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Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

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what do you call a drunk person? By his or her name and call him a cab

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Q: Whats the worst thing to drop in a prison shower? A: An exploding nail gun

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

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If you're having girl problems, I feel bad for you, son... Because I can empathise with you, and it's not a very nice situation to be in. Hope you work it out.

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What's blue, and smells like fish? A firetruck, I was kidding about the blue and fish.

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What is the difference between a park bench and a Mexican? The park bench can actually suport a family A. Woj

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an ant walks into my aunt.... the ant took a dump

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A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

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Q.If your have $6.00 and I have a hair cut, how many donkeys are in the paddock? A. Aliens with a hat????????????

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If You Bend Over Some More I'll Eat That Booty Too

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who is gay for wild ones- Ryan Mcgggguigan

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Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

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Human: "Panda get off that slide! Your a panda, you don't understand gravity!" Panda: g=9.81 m/s squared. Human: Oh, I see, carry on.

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What's red and funny? The holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops