-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Traveling Salesman.

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What did the octopus say to the lion? Nothing, because the likely hood of a lion and an octopus meeting is incredibly slim, as an octopus is a sea creature, and a lion isn't. A lion and an octopus cant even communicate with each other anyway, so even if they did come across each other they wouldn’t be able to talk. Octopi are also anti-social creatures by nature so I can say with some confidence that the lion and the octopus will not have a convocation. Written By JAMES!

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why did CJ cry?he just ate a pie full of meat from his favorite animal.Pig

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What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

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what did the women say when she saw a tiger maul a rabbit? she didn't see it, she was in the kitchen cooking and ironing

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Q:What happens when you choke a smurf? A: Nothing because smurfs dont exist

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Tiger Woods isn't a Tiger, He's a lion cheeta.

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Libyans stage a protest. They get massacred.

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What did batman do before getting into his batmobile? - Look for the keys.

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What do you call a man with an eight foot steel spike wedged in his rectum? An Ambulance

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What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

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A panda walks into a bar. He eats but then is tranquilized and taken back to the zoo.

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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You're so ugly you got rejected from the zoo.

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1: Knock, knock 2: Go away!

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What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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Why did little jimmy fall off the building? 9/11

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

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Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

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Q. Which one do you hate more? Jews, Mexicans, or Asians. A. I hate all of them, but jews are annoying when they resist getting stuffed in the oven.

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What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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