What happens when a rabbit is late for a very important date? Nothing, rabbits have no logical way to keep track of time.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? who cares even if they could screw it in it wouldnt work because there to poor to aford electricity

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red Violets are blue I am schizophrenic ...and so am I

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the mother give her family for christmas? Nothing. The family is Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Stab her.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was timmy having trouble with his homework? Because lobotomies were a forced practice in the 1950's.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man penetrates another man.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

thumb_up thumb_down +15

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +80

Your mama is so stupid that she thought Brendan Fraser was a good actor.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A hurt animal that should promtly be taken to the RSPCA for surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than finding a holocost in your apple. A truck full of dead babies then what's worse than finding a truck full of dead babies in your apple. Braving to pich fork them out

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why did the chicken cross the road?... it actually didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What lives underground? Grandpa

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are Purple Chickens are gray I'm color blind You have cancer I'll see you in hell Ba bye now

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q. How many jews can you fit in a car? A. depending on the car size and make, oh and the size of the ash tray is also important

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops