What is square and grey? A grey square.

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There are 2 women at a bus stop. One of them has a swollen belly. The pregnant woman says to the other one, "I'm expecting a baby." The other woman responds, "That's too bad. I'm expecting a bus, at least that'll help me."

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An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Sometimes you get the shitty coconut ones.

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Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

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why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

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what do you call a room full of one terrorist and several babies? dead babies

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Throw a brick at him.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

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Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

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knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

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Want to here a joke? The First Amendment.

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What dud the baseball player do when he struck out? Walked back to the bench

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eric, your old high school pal! Eric, you slept with my wife 3 years ago. You have her, please stop coming to my door and please stop saying your my pal. Pals don't sleep with other guys' wives.

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What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

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A black guy , a white guy and a jew walk into a resturaunt They are offered the special.

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How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? I cried when I cut up the onion.

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Why did the guy die? He had a fatal heart attack.

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

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Knock knock, COME IN!

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“Anything that moves ey?” – William Deane

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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