What happens when the hydro goes out for 1 second? 1 minute? 1 hour? 1 day? 1 month? 1 year? -1.8 people die. 105 people die. 6,306 people die. 151,338 people die. 4,603,198 people die. 55,238,376 people die. Aw shit, then you have to take account for how many people die of starvation :\, and the ones who froze to death, and the ones who died from heat stroke, And the ones who died of Alzheimers.

Terrorist jokes make me explode with laughter.

Shut up and stop laughing, Daddy's balls aren't gonna lick themselves.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

What's wrong with you? I have no idea.

Q. have you seen stevie wonders last album? A. neither has he.

what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

What happens to a red rock when you throw it in a blue sea? It gets wet

Why did the young woman have a sore vagina? Because she just experienced intercourse for the first time and her partner was not as gentle as he should've been, given the situation.

What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

What's a slang term for a really, really fat person? Overweight.

roses are red, violets are blue, i have AIDS, now so do you.

Q:What's the difference between a duck? A: The higher it flies, the much.

What's blue, and smells like fish? A firetruck, I was kidding about the blue and fish.

You know how I know you're gay? Because you came out to your close family and friends, who were all very respectful and accepting.

Shit.

Whats funnier than throwing a baby off the top of a building? The sound it makes when it hits the ground.

Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

kathryn atkins

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Robin, please, get in the Batmobile

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because he was insecure in his relationship with his soon to be wife.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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