What is big, hard, and bushy? My Penis. I lied about it being bushy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a wolf that eventually killed and ate it.

if you have two gay people, would their kid be gay too? oh wait....

Q:where does baby oil come from? A:Only the finest of babies

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

What did the black man get on his SAT's? -Barbecue sauce

Roses are red, violets are blue Charcoal is black, and so is my neighbor

Q: What is the fastest way to get insulted? A: Go screw yourself m0therf0cker!

Q: What's white, black, and red all over? A: The yellow brick road

There's no "i" in tim.

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. (do you get it cause the robot has no arms)

Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

A seal walks into a club. The man proceeds to skin it and sell the fur for profit.

why did matt daly want to go to prison? to be fondled

What do you call an German with a knife in his leg ? An ambulance as he has a serious leg wound and will soon die of blood loss

Where did Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere.

A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

What rhymes with orange? Somalia.

Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

God

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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