Sarah Jessica Parker

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

thumb_up thumb_down +4

interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was Little Susie's IQ less than 30? Because, she is mentally retarted.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the Bruins win against the Flyers? ....they had goal tending.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you make a telemarketer scream? Set him on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

There are no stupid Questions just stupid people

thumb_up thumb_down +8

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Worst joke to tell an orphan. Knock knock. Who's there. Not your parents

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the first koala fall off the tree? He Died Why did the second koala fall off the tree? He was stapled the the first koala

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How's the weather? Good.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q) What is the difference between an elephant and a toaster? A) Do you seriously not know the difference between an elephant... and a toaster?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Nate has 32 candy bars. he eats 28 of them. What is he left with? 4 candy bars

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops