A bartender walks up to a church and a synagogue

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Why can't Emily swing because she has no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Emily

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What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A nugget

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What did the white guy say to the black guy? What's up?

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You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

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This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

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what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

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want to hear a joke? then go ask someone else i dont know any.

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A Jew and a Nazi walk into a bar... 1 year later they are married with a baby on the way

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An orthodox rabbi, a Methodist preacher and a Muslim Cleric walk into a bar and blow that month's tithings on video slots.

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austins gay lolololol

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You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

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pady irish man paddy english man and paddy african man go on a magic slide wat ever you say will be at the bottem paddy irish man said gold paddy english man silver paddy african man almost fell off so he said shit buthalf way down he thought it was fun so he said wee

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

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Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

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what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

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What do you call 6 dead people on your front lawn? A mass murder

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Why did the black man run from the officer? The officer was trying to rape him.

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Q. What did the wierd kid get for christmas A. A Pokemon diamond edition

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Why did the downy jump off a cliff? I told him to.

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What do you call a horse standing alone in an empty field? Tesco's own Beef Lasagne.

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A man walked into a bar 2 hours later he died from drinking and driving

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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