Why did the chicken cross the road? Earlier that morning the farmers daughter had inadvertently left the gate to the yard open as she was preoccupied by her worry over a maths test set for that day. She hadn't studied for the test as she was still deeply distressed over her fathers recent heart attack. This, coupled with the added burden of household chores now delegated to her because her mother was out trying to get the west field prepared for sowing, had made her quite forgetful and distracted of late. Whilst several chickens escaped, only one strayed so far that it actually encountered the road facing the farm. After crossing the road and gorging itself in a soybean crop, the chicken was struck by a furniture removers van as it attempted to make its way home. Several hours later the dead chicken was spotted by a Community Mental Health Worker who was doing his bi-weekly rural clinic run. The chicken, being a bantam caught the eye of the Mental Health worker, who was a keen trout fisherman. "Cool" thought the mental health worker- "those feathers will make for excellent trout flies". He stopped and plucked a handful of the most iridescent blue, green and orange feathers and placed them in an envelope. He rolled himself a cigarette, sat on the trunk of his car and admired the clouds. "God, I love this job", he muttered to no one in particular.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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Q: You know what's better and funnier than reading all these jokes A: GLEE and thats like singing and dancing :p JK it HAPPy tree friends LOOK IT UPPP!!!

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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there's a irishman, australian and and englishman man on a plane. they are going to france

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Enough with the "whats worse than ... "jokes! They are getting old and have a millon different possible answers. I am aware that this is not a joke but thumbs up if you aggree with.

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An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the boy fall off of his bike? He was hit by falling koalas.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I am homeless, Can I have some food?

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ask if someone wants to hear a joke then say "never mind"

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A black man, a small child, and a priest were all standing in line. They were all checking in the hospital after being in a 3 car pileup

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

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Why did the gay man die? He had AIDS

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Stephen Hawking wheels into the Center for Theoretical Cosmology.

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What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

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A man walks into a bar and a lady asks "Can I help you?" The man replies "No." and walks out of the bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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Hi I am Michael Jackson... you have any young boys? My park is open :), the "nude dark caverns" can be scary, but I accompany them all, so relax. Moral: LEAVE MJ ALONE! ;(

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Q:How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could would A: 26

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What do you get when a white person and a black person make a baby? A possible high functioning member of society.

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Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

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Why did 3 blacks guys start watching the first Star Wars movie on Saturday night? They finished the Back to the Future movies on Friday.

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ive got 99 problems and my diabetes is one of them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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