What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why can't Helen Keller drive a bus? Because she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why are small clowns and baby's alike? They both dreadfully die when hit in the face with an axe!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

emma: how will we survive zombies? mat t: just give me a blow job ......4 seconds later emma: so what now?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock! Who's there? John Simons. This joke lacks a punchline. Yes, yes it does.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why'd Mary fall off her bike? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Mary... O.o

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but if you set him on fire, he'll die

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: How many black people came KFC on June 31st? A: None because June 31st doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down

roses are red violets are blue bullets are lead now i shoot you

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you say to a dead man who knocks on your door? Nothing, you shoot him cause he's a zombie

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? Doormat.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's big and looks like a mushroom? A Mushroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A dyslexic man walks into a building labeled, Bra. He then thinks he has found heaven but is suprised when all that is served is beer, not milk.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do apples and black men both have in common? They are both people except for the apple

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man scratches his ankle and says " my nuts are itchy" a woman looks at him questionly. realizing he had been watched, he lifted the bottom of his pant leg and showed to woman that he had stuffed his socks with pecans.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I guys look at this new game I bought, what is it, it's called penis it's supposed to be toatally hard

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you catch a unique rabbit? You could probably find many of them in the vicinity of Chernobyl. The radiation has probably created thousands of mutations. They are probably not as fast as regular rabbits.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why does my friend pick up garbage? Because he is a garbageman.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why are all of the cars in the left lane? Because you are in Winona MN.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Your momma's so fat, she died on the operating table during her bypass surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops