Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no hands. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not sally.

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

how do demolish a building alkekwhakbar

how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, And I'm color blind, So I don't give a shit

if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

What does a man that has to go to the bathroom do when there is no restroom within a reasonable walking radius? He gets in his car and drives to the nearest rest stop.

Did you hear about the man who thought his wife was trying to kill him? He's dead.

Who wears a forest ranger's hat and carries a can of kerosene? An arsonist who happens to be a forest ranger.

How many blonds does it take to kidnap a child? One.

Where's Waldo? Nowhere. Waldo is a fictional character. He doesn't exist.

Yo daddy!

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

Why is Michael J. Fox unable to build domino chains? He only has one domino.

Freddie Mercurys teeth

Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

Why was the five-year old lying in the middle of the sidewalk? Because he was dead.

What's 6+2? 16

why did the chicken cross the road? I Lied, it was a cow not a chicken and it was a highway full of speeding cars slamming into the cow body until it would stop moooooooooooooooooving...

Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...