Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was thrown out of the way

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Ask me if I like pie. Do you like pie? OF COURSE!!!!!

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What's the difference between a black girl and a white girl? Nipple color

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What did little Jimmy get for Christmas? Presents because he wasn't poor.

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What's the difference between Jews and Germans? Jews are allowed to have an opinion about the Holocaust and hoot and holler and threaten anyone who has a different opinion than they. The sad, anti-joke part of this is that most morons will actually support this tyrannical bullying behavior. Also, special taxes against Germans that they're not allowed to have a problem with. I guess slavery is okay if you're White.

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Why did the boy scratch his back? A:because it was itchy.

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A dog walks into the local newspaper to place an ad. The dog writes; "woof woof, woof woof woof." Receptionist: You know you can ad another two woofs for the same price? Dog: Well that wouldn't make any sense at all?

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Yo momma is so ugly, she might not win the "America's next top model" contest.

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what happen to the popo who got arrested? he told himself that he had the right to remain silent

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What worse than being shot? Waking up and finding a penis in your mouth.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did Johnny fall down? Because I threw tropical fruit at him.

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So a Jew an Asian and a gay guy all walk into a bar... ...I lied. It was an oven.

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What did Timmy say when the bus crashed? Nothing, it was a horrible crash, he died like everyone else. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Timmy.

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What did the downsyndrome get for christmas? Aborted

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How do u catch a polar bear u cut a hole in the ice put peas around the hole and when the bear comes to take a pea u kick it in the ice hole

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

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Brienna Chladek (515)556-4811. Call me;) anytime I'm a teenager:) xoxo

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What did the man say when he dropped an apple on his foot? That might have caused some minor discomfort had I not been wearing shoes.

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Q: Why do Japanese people have eyes that look like they're stretched to the side of their head? A: When they are born, they come out head first, and their eyes are stretched to the side of their head and are stuck in that position due to the sticky, glue like substance found inside a woman's stomach.

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why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

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Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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