I JUST HAD SEEX! How blantant, eh?

Knock Knock.. Who's there? The IRS, you owe $50,000 in back taxes and we're repossessing your home.

What's the difference between Jew and a bread? Bread does not scream when you put him in oven.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

Dear Sarah, My name is Jesse, and I am severely overweight. BOUNCE ON MY DICK LIKE TYGA BITCH, Your lover, Jesse.

an autistic child eats its family's dogs poop and dies

Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

Why can't the children hug his father? Because his father is dead.

Why did the asbestos cross the road? Because it was being removed from an elementary school due to the fact that asbestos is an air pollutant which is regulated under section 112 of the Clean Air Act of 1970.

The seven dwarfs were in a sauna feeling happy. So Happy got up and left.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

why was smokey bear sad? he got cancer from smokeing

What do you call a black priest? Religious.

How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

why did u fart to loud? because you butt said so

What is green and has wheels? A blue car.

Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and shitty? A bootleg stick.

There's two people, one wearing a nice sweater and the other is not. The one without has to walk the dog, so he asks the other guy if he can have his sweater. He says "No but you can wear it."

So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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