Leo! Leo get over here before i abuse you. Okay, im going to my whip.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

if you have a name/nickname/brand/version or number, please like this anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what did the girl do when she saw a spider in her bathroom? she peed.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A: knock knock B: the door is open, why don't you come right in?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

War horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long film?'

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is green, ugly and can't empty his bowels without exerting a tremendous amount of energy? A constipated, ugly, green thing.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

why did the teenaged girl cry? she was about to have an abortion

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a black airman? A pilot!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what did one waiter say to the other? were waiters.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

I hate it when people dont finish there sen

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why didn't the boy come out of the closet? He had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Robert Mugabe.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops