an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there could be several reasons. The sight of another chicken, its wondering imagination, but because chickens cannot speak, therefore, can never know the true answer.

once, my friend said hi. i said hi back

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

Mooses

What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

Knock knock Who's there Interrupting camel (Interrupt with nothing) Camels can't talk.

How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

oops

How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

How did the dragon get AIDS? He had sex with an HIV positive dragon months prior.

And the guy who played Trapper John on MASH wins the coveted 'Last Famous TV Person to Die in 2015' award!!! Woooooooo!!!!

What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

What's black and fun to hang from trees? Tire swings.

david give me my money back... i will have it next week

how do you keep a blonde busy for 7 to 8 hours. you give her m&m's and tell her to spell a word.

What's fat, gay, and ugly. A fat, gay, and ugly guy.

A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

what reason a man dont cry when the dog of his own childs dies? *guess the answer now a) he killed it b) he didnt like it c) a + b

why did haris die...............................................his hair blond? .. u

why did everyone in the swimming pool move away from the woman... because she had a miscarriage

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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