A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

A very ugly man with has sex with a lamb because he is so ugly. He subsequently gets ghonorhea and dies 2 years later of brain cancer.

Yo momma is so fat that her cholesterol level is above 240 mg/dL and should highly consider a vegan diet if she wishes to improve.

Knock Knock Whose there. Mike Mike seriously I told you to stop coming here or ill call the police But I just wanted to talk to you Ok thats it im calling the police

A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

A guy walks into a bar, he has a few drinks than leaves.

What do you call a mexican without a lawn mower? .....unemployed

what shoes do pedafiles wear White vans

A man with glasses and a cane walks out if a clothing store and accidentally bumps into a woman, knocking his hat off "Can't you watch where you're going?" the woman asks. The man then slaps her, knocking her to the ground. He picks up his new designer fedora, and drives off in his $90,000 Cadillac. The woman, after dusting herself off, gets the guy's plates, convinces a few witnesses to testify against the man, and informs the authorities of an assault. He was later arrested for assault as well as pimping and soliciting sex. He is found guilty in a court of law and is sentenced to 2-5 years in prison, and is doled a hefty fine.

How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

identical jokes get different votes.

What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

911 jokes are just plane wrong

What happens when metal and ice collide together? The Titanic

Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

How do you shoot a basketball? With your hands

Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

What is it worse than a bee sting ? -Two bee stings What 's worse than two bee stings ? -The holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust ? -3 bee stings

What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

Liverpool City Football Club

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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