A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says that there are no dogs allowed, but the man says that he is blind. So the man sits down with his dog and asks for a drink. The bartender decided to check to see if he was really blind, so he says, " Hey, do you know what time it is?" The blind man replies, "7 o'clock," The bartender says, "Ha! You said you were blind! Get out of..." but was interrupted by the man, who promptly said, "No, I'm deaf," and left.

why did the chicken cross the road? because the light was green

Knock knock Come in

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

a man walks into a library Who the hell reads

Your mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror it displays her reflection like all mirrors do

Your blood is red. Your bruises are blue. I have a gun. Now drag your carcass away from my residence.

I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

No because your face is really f***** up.

Why did the postal worker go to work? Because he has to support his family so they do not starve like his dog.

Why couldn't the dumbass go to colledge? He couldn't open the door.

What is white and fluffy? A cotton ball.

What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

what happens when chuck norris does a push up. he pushes himself up

what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

roses are red violets are blue some poems are good and some don't

What did the blonde say when she was asked what color her hair was ? Blonde.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why'd he fall off again? Because we put him back on.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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