what would Michael jakson do if he was alive? scream and hit the top of his coffin

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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Why was the man waiting at the bus stop? He was on his way to work

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What do Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder have in common? They are both blind.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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Penis

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As friend of mine recently told me that he knew my deepest darkest secret. When I asked him what it was, he said that I was too emotionally unstable, and that I would never be ready to settle down. I killed him.

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In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Being sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

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do want to hear a joke? Women's rights

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99% of guys are hot. The other 1% go to my school.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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Why is Digimon better than Pokemon? It has a better story and character development.

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Why did the girl gO shopping?! Because she got paid and wanted to blow(;

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Why was the black man sent to prison? He was wrongfully accused of a crime which is a fine example of how flawed today's justice system is.

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What happened when a gay man asked a straight man what time it was? He told him the correct time, they parted ways and went about with their lives.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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hi bye

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a jew, a latino and an aboriginal walk into a bar this is an example of a great inter-racial comunity

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Roses are red my name is Dave this poem makes no sense, micorwave

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Knock knock Who's there? You Whoa...

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One kid says I've had threw bottles of water and I haven't had to go to the bathroom. His friend says may have a urinary tract infection.

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what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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