What do u do if a blonde throws a bomb at u Trigger the bomb and throw it back

thumb_up thumb_down -17

an orange and an apple are both in a fruit bowl, the apple says nothing as its an apple and apple's cant speak its just an apple

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

thumb_up thumb_down -193

how do you take a shit in public? pull down your pants and push in public

thumb_up thumb_down -24

whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

thumb_up thumb_down +25

guess what what that wasnt it

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q) What's worse than getting a parking ticket? A) The Black Death

thumb_up thumb_down +7

FOX News: Fair and balanced

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: How do you stop a baby from crying? A: You hit it with brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +21

a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

[] [] Those are eyes These are teeth

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What has equally bad consequences as breaking someone's leg in front of the local authorities? Breaking your own leg on purpose in front of the local authorities.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the blind boy get for Christmas? The same toys from last year.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A black man walks into a bar. "Whoops, that's not the Weed shop!"

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Q: What comes after 8? A: 9

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 was a pussy.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's black, white, and red all over? A painting with black, white and red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the unicorn cross the road? i dont know. unicorns arent real

thumb_up thumb_down +36

lewis ya baggy fuck

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops