i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

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old spice body spay is so powerfull it can block BO for 16 hours. its so powerfull it can turn of the sun, but then it gets to cold, so it makes another sun........DOUBLE SUN POWWWWWEEEERRRRRRR!!!

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RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? Pizza doesn't scream when you put it into an oven.

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When life gives you lemons, you realise that life isn't a physical object and therefore you have problems. Have a nice day.

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your moms soooooo FAT that she went on a diet and became really sexy

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Roses are red Violets are blue Little billy was annoying me But he can't anymore Because now he's dead In a burlap sack In the back of my truck And it's really bloody back there

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Scenario: 2 guys with big feet and a camels Anus are hiking on Mount Everest with a set of elephants dildos Man 1: what's the difference between a Volkswagen and a clock? Man 2: what? Man 1: you can't toboggan of a green house roof with a tub of Vaseline and a ostrich party on lady gaga's Anus

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? All over. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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What do you call a handyman with no arms? By his name.

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What happened in your mom's locked bedroom last night I don't know

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What's worse than a bee sting? Getting shot in the head

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Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

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What do you call a monkey lost in a desert? A donkey who was forgotten by his owner.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was stapled to the head of a penis that belonged to an asian man

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How did the black man get put in jail? He didn't, he never did anything illegal

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How do you fit four elephants in a car ? Two in the front and two in the back

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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why did the woman call the police? because there was a murderer pointing a gun at her at her son.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? (knocker runs for life).

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What did the priest say to the kid? You can tell your dog but nobody else, ok?

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What do you get when you read a book? More knowledge in your brain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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