Why did the cow say moo? Because all cows say moo

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Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

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whats red, brown and blown up? a hampster in a microwave

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

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What do you call a black man with a PhD.? A Doctor! What are you, racist?

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They discuss politics and time travel.

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What do you call a man who was just struck in the head with a bowling ball? An ambulance would be the most appropriate thing to call since this man just sustained a serious head injury and medical responders should be contacted, lest his brain start hemorrhaging.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's worse than dying in the holocaust Dying on the last day of the holocaust

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Why was the horse sad? Because it seen a Tesco van in the distance.

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An irish man walks into a bar. He drinks responsibly, and leaves shortly afterward.

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What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

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How did the Jewish husband and wife stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

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A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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I'm gay. No homo.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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why did the chicken cross the road, but didnt make it he didnt cross it. he was pushed by a band of gang members and hit by a bus

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How much is that doggy in the window? It's not for sale....it's waiting to be euthanized.

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What do you call a puppy in alaska? A cold PUPPY!!!!!

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Q:Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A:One less drunk

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Half koala, half walrus, behold...the Koalrus!

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Your breath smells like onions.

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Whats worse than your shoe being untied? 911

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops