why did my iphone screen get scratched :(? because i dropped it ):

thumb_up thumb_down -1,241

Why does Beyonce sing "to the left, to the left"? Because that's where a box of everything you own is

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the kid take the trash out to the movies? Because his mum said take out the trash

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what's the difference between a bearded man and bearded lady the bearded man has a PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the chair say when someone sat on it? Nothing. The person's butt covered the chair's mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

thumb_up thumb_down +67

Q: Why happened to the dead whale? A: It was shot by Asian pochures.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Lol! The connection timed out. Double D`s they kill my back so I am gonna get them reduced someday, and sure because it gets really itchy otherwise.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the mentally disabled child say to the snowman? Mnnghhhmuhmuhhu ooh ooh ooh!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Oh

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how did the jewish man die He had a fatal hard attack

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your mom is so fat she's overweight

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats big, white, and will kill you if it falls out of a pine tree? A refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Where did the 5 gay guys go? One direction

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the gay man not walk straight? Because I took a jack hammer to his foot

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A chicken and a horse go into a bar due to an imperative of an earlier joke, they notice that there are flowers on the bar. The flowers are red and blue. They wonder what they could be.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What Can't You See and Stinks A Fart.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops