Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

Roses are red Im adopted

What did a lot of money say? I FEEL LIKE A MILLION BUCKS!!!!!

Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

What do you call a purple apple? Bruised.

What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

Did you hear about the giant termite who walks into a beer joint and asks, "Is the bartender here?" Did you hear about the giant termite who walks into a beer joint and asks, "Is the bartender here?" Did you...

American Idol

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

Whats so bad about all the black people in the world dying? The police would be out of a job.

Roses are red. So is bacon, Poetry is hard . bacon.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got mercifully trampled by a nearby 18 wheeler.

Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the narcoleptic patient? It wasn't. The patients were treated because of moral obligations, but the doctors that laughed were either fired or warned, depending on if they had previous reports of exploitation of patients.

Q.What do you call a black man flying a plane? A. A black pilot you racist bastard

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

What's funnier than 24? 25.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. That always nice, you dont want your dairy products to spoil.

What does a blind, deaf, parapalegic baby get for christmas? Cancer.

Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

Sam murray got home after school one day, he siad hello to his father and possibly played some Avatar on the D.S

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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