Why was the boy embarassed at school? He got a noticable boner during class.

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Why did the boy find love? because if the girl did not love her he would kill her

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Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

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A man named Cecil walks into a bar. He then orders a drink.

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If Michael Jackson were alive today, what would he be doing? Scratching at the top of his coffin.

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When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

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Why did the kid eat his homework because the teacher said it was a piece of cake

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Everyone is amazed because he can now walk.

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Moo! I'm a goat!

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Two men walk into a bar. The bar was being robbed. They were both shot in the confusion.

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9 tottenham fans walk into a french bar 2 minutes later French fans attack them saying this is for making our history lessons boring 1 shouts ohh the holocaust French fans ash him even more 5 say there call the jew squard next minute there getting attacked by a bunch of kids and lying that there were 30 neo Nazi men.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Why are hookers and babies so alike? You can have sex with both.

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What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

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An Irishman stays home

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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An Asian Woman is late and is driving her car very fast to her daughters wedding. She arrives at a reasonable time to witness the whole event.

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Person 1:"Knock Knock" Person 2: Whos there.... Wait why did you literally say the words "Knock Knock" Person 1: I have no idea

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roses are red violets are blue your mum is a whore as are you:)

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You're so ugly you got rejected from the zoo.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Trayvon Martin and George Zimmerman.

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KNOCK KNOCK. WHO'S THERE? BOO. OH, HEY. COME IN. ....

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why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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