Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

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A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Probably

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs 283 pounds.

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Why isn't pluto a planet anymore? Nasa decided it was too small

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A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Prince of bell air with Keanu Reeves: SMIIIIIIIIIIITH! DID YOU DESTROY MY COUCH? Neo: ... WELL DID YOU BOTHER CARLTON DOING HIS STUFF? Neo... Will you shut up then? ... Intro: This, is my story, read the text, thank you.

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Why did the man stop playing his computer game? The SWAT busted down his door and quickly pinned him down and arrested him for the murder of 7 families, he was charged for life in prison.

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What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

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Q: Why did the black guy cross the road? A: Hell, I don't know. He probably stole something.

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Women

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whats a great gift to share with small children? Ebola

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whats 2+2? gonorrhea.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Llama. Llama who? Llamas aren't racist unlike that bastard Ann Coulter. That's why they can get a carrot up the ass and she can't.

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What did the boy with no srms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What is faster? A mustang or a corvette? A fighter jet you stupid idiotic piece of crap!

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A blonde walks into a bar. She is rushed to the hospital and treated for a broken nose and a busted lip. She now has a deformed nose.

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

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What has 7 mouths 3 eyes and 5 noses Something very ugly

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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