knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you wake Lady GaGa up? set her alarm for a reasonable hour.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

what is black white and red all over? A black and white movie with the first violent color leave a comment if this joke is duped.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

Roses are red pickel are green i split you legs whats in between

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

I swear to god it wasnt me Dont swear to go its a sin !

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what did the black man say to the white man? hi

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

what is white on top and black on the bottom? Society

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Your mama sucks so much dick, it's not funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's after 9/11? 9/12

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the Asian woman crash her car? She couldn't see through the slits she called eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Whats green and has wheels?? - Grass, I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock-knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? Trying to sell a used truck with dead baby stains all over it.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops