Your in a building there's no windows ,doors and a sement floors and u only have a mirror and a table how do you get out You look in the mirror see what u saw take the saw saw the table in half two halfs make a hole clime out the hole

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You want to hear a joke? Republican

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A grandma writes to her young grandson every day over e-mail with funny lines and pictures,He shows his parents a joke she sent him it reads- "A guy walks into a bar.. He says ouch" They then read on and call the police.They say "Son go to your room.. you're being stalked by a pedophile.. Your grandma has been dead since last year.. we are sorry"

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What happens when you stab a black man? An equal race rights protest.

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What did the cat say at his mother's funeral? Nothing. He was too grief stricken over the loss of his beloved guardian.

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Uh... You know them N words... When they come crashing into the neiborhood the neiborhood quality drops and gets totally destroyed youknow what im sayan? Uh yeah sure totally... Then you know they spread around smell up dirty and toxicify the whole area, they become so fat and loud and like take everything away from you. Yeah HEIL KKK!! WUUT? I was talking Aboot them Nukular warheds! You you... SOMETHING! Hey! Dont get offensive man, sorry I was just KIDDING!... yeah... KIDDIIING!

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Roses are smiling, violets are trying to kill me. DId I mention I'm a paranoid schizophrenic?

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with an alligator? Go take some acid and find out for yourself

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How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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What's one thing good about cancer? (make them guess) Nothing you fricking prick!

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Knock Knock Who's There? The Police The Police Who? Uhm, Ma'am your son just died in a car wreck

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

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Lets make like trees and stand still

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what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

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Wife, "Wake up... i think there's someone in the house, do something... go downstairs and have a look!" Husband, "Do it yourself." Wife, "You what? You can't expect a woman to fight off an intruder..." Husband, "You women wanted equal rights so here you go, do it yourself."

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Why is water clear? Because it doesn't have a pigmentation.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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Your Mommas so scary slender is afraid of her -_-

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What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

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What is the difference between a dog and a North Korean tank. When I see a dog I think wow, what a cute dog. When I see a North Korean tank I run away screaming, as do many others, and I hope the marines come and save us.

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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