Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

Why did Colnel Sanders cross the road? Colnel Ryan Sanders crossed the road to attack Taliban fighters who were endangering his military presence.

Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

Rebecca Black

why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

A man forgets to hang his food in a tree on a camping trip. A bear comes and kills his wife and two kids but leaves the man to live with the guilt for the rest of his life.

Q. What do cows and grass have in common? A. They both moo, except for grass ????????????

What did the zebra say to the giraffe? Nothing, they can't talk dipshit.

Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? Because they are delicious, and very filling.

Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

I heard a scary rumor that when you plzy a windows istaller cd backwards, it plays a secret message, but what's even scarier, is that when you play it forwards, it installs windows.

Why did spock look in the toilet he was concerned with his poop

What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

What is the difference between a Homosexual and a Heterosexual? They are both Black.

WUT SMELLS ? my poo

Shush girl, shut your lips do the Helen Keller and advocate the rights the disabled.

how do you know Newcastle are losing? its 5 past 3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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