A black man is sitting in front of the bus Then he respectfully gives up his seat to an elder woman

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman

Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

Which square is small and yellow? The small, yellow square.

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

Did you hear about the 2 car crash in a walmart parking lot? 50 mexicans died

How do you get a black man down from a tree? If the man cannot climb down himself, perhaps call the fire department.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

How do you kill a blonde? By inactivating major functions in the body, for example cutting off the blood supply to the brain.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

READ IT ALL> whats the difference between a jew and a pizza...the jew is a human with living features and organs that keep his body hydrated while also keeping his blood pumped throughout him, otherwise the pizza is a circular, doe based cake like food topped with a fine layer of cheese and in some cases topped of with other substances such as pineapple or ham :)

What do you call it when you almost win? You lose.

Why is Obama the Antichrist? Salad.

whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...