Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind and is a women, who are notoriously bad drivers.

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what happens if you set micheal jackson on fire nothing he is 6 feet under incased in concrete if he wasnt hed melt

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Why did the man fall off the cliff? I pushed him????????

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He was. I am sorry, he knows to much, this is for the well being of everyone, including yourself, he will be going down, the order has been given.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Bill Walters from across the street. How are we talking through a door?

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Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

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Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

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An abortionist secretly fancies himself pro life, with reservations. Overwhelmed, and utterly fed up, with the burden of carrying on the family business, he aborts himself. Although he was only 46, his frail mother was nevertheless proud of his decision to succeed where she had failed 46 years ealier.

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An Englishmen, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar, and ordered a beer. They later went home and slept. They woke up the next morning with a slight hangover.

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i hate it when Voldemort showers in my nutella

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

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Roses are red That much is true But violets are purple Not freaking blue

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Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

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How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was severely depressed.

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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Why did the black guy hate the white guy??? Because the white guy enslaved his ancestors.

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What I have learned about the Japanese studying video games and anime (read below for more, better studies): Student at school: USING PENN TO TYPU! USING PEN TO TYPU! Teacher: No Susaki San! You must onry yell the name of attakus! You suspension get! Student: JOSH! I CHARRENGE YOU TO MORTAR KOMBAT! Teacher: KAAAAAAAAMEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEE! Student: FINAL FRAAAAAAASH! Student and teacher: Locked into energy wave combat for several hours. Teacher: Puh... Lets rather settle this with a round of Shaolin Soccer... Student: VICTOLY! Me: Well I saw a disturbing lot of Japanese people cosplay dressed as zangief... Skinny guys with fake chesthair and red hair that kept posing with their (nonexistent) muscles and yelling RED CYCRONE! Wanting me to take pictures of them... And Japanese lolitas, and blonde girls called Ganguro... Weirdest trip ever... They also kept Looking at Emanuel my (black) friend, and assumed he was my servant... Conclusion: My real trip to Japan was not so different from my above example as one might think...

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A man walks into a bar. His alcoholism is destroying his family.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

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Why can't Hellen Keller read, write, or do anything really? Because, shes a woman.

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Jhon is riding his wheelchair, but can't get up the driveway. Lucky a stranger passes by. Jhon: Can you help me please sir? Stranger: No

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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What did the little girl say after her dad hit her? Nothing. She was a month old and died instantly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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