what would you watch during a scary movie? anything you want.

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An asian, mexican, and a black guy walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "get the hell out"

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How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

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--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because he's a pussy.

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An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

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How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm blind.

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Yo mamas so fat, when she jumps in a pool she displaces a disproportionate volume of water.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What did the young boy get his Father for Father's Day? A bouquet of flowers for his grave stone.

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A black man and a Mexican fall off a cliff, who dies first? They both die from hitting sharp rocks at the bottom crushing their skulls, so it doesn't matter its just really sad.

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How do you sink a Polish battleship? You breach the hull.

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how do you get a 1 armed moron out of a tree? you wave

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What do you call a really bad band? Nickelback.

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Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

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Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

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Why did the black man get drenched by a fire hose because he was on fire

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What's worse than killing 6,000,000 Jews? Killing 6,000,001.

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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