What did Helen Keller do when she found a dead body? Nothing.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Where do the biggest potatoes grow? the ground.

How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except that didn't work for the boy. He also lost his ice cream.

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how do you kill chuck norris. you don't

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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What's the same between a bike and a duck? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

That is a bad anti-joke down there | V

Okay, then I am taking the last comment back then.

What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

An Irish man walks past a bar... it could happen...

Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

How do you stop a baby alien from crying? Watch what its mother does to soothe it and then try and copy that.

how long does it take a black woman to shit? 3 to 5 minutes depending on the food she ingested earlier that day

roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

An old jewish man, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

What did the cheerleader get for christmas? Money, because she's a stupid w hore

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

What's bad for your teeth? A brick

What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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