A man walks up to a woman in a bar. They hit it off. That night they make wild sex and fall madly in love with each other. They start dating, it's so fantastic. They understand each other on almost every emotional and intellectual level. They have the same humor and they love spending time together. The sex is so great. After a few years, they get married, and they start the rest of their lives together. They have 2 beautiful children and their lives are blossoming. Fast forward 30 years. They are both retired old people, yet still madly in love. They live in their old home, and their lives are very comfortable. Their children have grown up into adults, and are very happy. Fast forward another 10 years, and they now live in an elderly home. They are both in wheelchairs and their health is slowly deteriorating. They die.

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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Whats fuzzy and greenand if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

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what do you get when you throw a refrigerator at a boy on a bike? a severely injured boy, a lawsuit , a police record and a prison mate

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Why did the child cry? It was beat up and thrown in a trashcan.

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what smells like diarrhea and looks like diarrhea? diarrhea stupid

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A monkey and his owner walk into a bar they sit down at the bar... I dont know the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs sitting on your street corner? Suicidal.

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I'm sorry sally your grandmother is dead. LOL _ grandpa Laugh out loud!. I can't belive you. I thought it meant lots of love Grandpa-ha funny mistake though right?

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knock knock whos there? nobody

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why did little Hannah not like the poem "Roses are Red" because she was colorblind

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, sauce on apples.

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Roses are red Pickles are green I leik ur legs and whats inbetween

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Why did it die Nothing died

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What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

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What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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Suppose an American, an Indian, a dinosaur, and a leprechaun are on a plane together. Which one would be the first to chug a 7 pound bottle of coke? The situation is too unlikely, with the odds of it occurring being less than 1%, therefore the question cannot be answered accurately.

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Why didn't the black guy get paid for doing work hard at labor? it was the year of 1860!!

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What is dangerous when eaten? My grandmother's cooking?

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What did the young girl say to her step-dad? Nothing. She no longer talks to him after years and years of sexual abuse which left her emotionally scarred.

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? Depends how hard you push.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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