what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

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How do you kill an american? You shoot them

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Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

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Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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What's the difference between a cat and a banana? Bananas don't scream as much when you peel them.

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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HEy Hey Hey! Lakers are so going to bounce back!

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Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

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Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did the milk man cry? Cause you killed his family.

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why couldnt hellen keller drive? cuz she was blind

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My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. (Submitted by Aidan)

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Trees are like friends. They both fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

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How do you address a gay, jewish, african male? You can't, as addressing a person would imply mailing them. And that would violate their human rights. As well, the cost of shipping a package of that size would be rather prohibitive

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a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

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Q: What's funnier than a baby in a blender? A: A baby in a clownsuit in a blender.

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Whats the difference between the black man and the white man? The black man was born with more melanin the pigment in there skin, which would concur the black man did have darker skin. Also, the white man had cancer.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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So, a giraffe walks into a bar and orders six martinis and shame on for wanting a punch line this giraffe needs help.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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