A man gets into a joan Battle. He says Lamboguini Mercy your chick so thirsty then his pponent says Shut up Your chick is thirsty beacs yours face looks like a dried orange The man runs away Then the opponent realizes His Girlfrienn just aked Him for some water

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Doctor! I have no problems at all! So, uh why are you here? Isnt that freaking weird? Wow, that might be a problem! Puh! I have a problem then. Yeah, goodbye!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the paraplegic boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock! Who's there? I am.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Roses are red Violets are blue I regurgitate doorknobs

thumb_up thumb_down -131

Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

thumb_up thumb_down -11

The Charlotte Bobcats winning more than 10 games

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A-B-C-D-E-F-G-R-U-D-T-F With me

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did George Washingtn say to is men before crossing the Delaware? Men, get in the boat.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do a purple grape and an elephant have in common? They are both purple, except for the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

John Travolta went to a seafood disco last week.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

how many jews does it take for me to be able to have sex with my cousin's girlfriend? idk, but that's how many I need. actually let me have some extras. couldn't hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I like boys!!!!! CC

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

thumb_up thumb_down -112

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet his friend the horse at a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops