Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A knock knock B who's there A nobody

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How do you get 100 illegal immigrants into a furnace? Tell 'em it's England.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

You should read the Terms of Service.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the nun cry? 12 babies were killed under her care.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why is a jewish man so tall? Genetics

thumb_up thumb_down -24

If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How many dead babies does it take to fill up a car? Dead babies should be reported to the police and not be stuffed into cars.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Do you know how I know that you're gay? You told me you are gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Did you hear about the elderly bank robber? Me neither.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q. Why did the Muslim go to hell? A. Because his name was Osama Bin laden.

thumb_up thumb_down

I'm on a see food diet- it consists of fish and molluscs. sea*

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what happened to the little kid on a bicycle? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Jeremy has 8 apples. Susie has 3. how much does Jason have? Purple because aliens don't like grapes.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

hey John will you make some copies

thumb_up thumb_down +1

knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

thumb_up thumb_down -16

You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +8

2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops