two pigs in a bath one says to the other can you pass me the soap..the other replies..do I look like a typewriter!?

Why did Tupac Shakur get shot? He was a famous and very controversial celebrity, which naturally led to having a lot of enemies.

What did the table say to the human? Nothing, tables don't talk.

A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

A ship sinks in the middle of the South Pacific, only one man survives. He swims over to a deserted island.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Why did the boy fail his test? Because he got shot before he could even study.

A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

the little boy got in a ice cream truck he cant sit down anymore

How do u put an elephant in a refrigerator? -open it up and put it in How do u put a girraffe in a refrigerator? -open it up take out the elephant and put it in All the animals it the world are at a party in Florida. Which one didnt go? -the girraffe, it was in the frige Your trying to cross a river. A sign says alligators everywhere. U have no boat and no bridges. How do u get across? - swim the alligators are at the party in florida

What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

Your mother is so unintelligent that her IQ score is equal to or lower than 2 standard deviations below the national average of 100 on the Mensa approved intelligence test that has been properly administered and supervised.

whats the difference between sand and period blood? You cannot gargle sand.

Why couldn't little Sarah smell the roses? Her face was mauled by a grizzly bear

What's worse than a cow on the ceiling? - two cows on the ceiling.

What is matt dalys favorite thing in the world? penis

How do you get a clown off a swing? You kill him with an axe

Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding an apple in your worm.

Q. how did the blond get a college degree in medicine? A. she studied hard and aced her final exam.

A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

Why does a man wake up every morning to do the same job over again? Because, wait... what the heck kind of a question is that?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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