Why did the fisherman die on a fishing trip? He had a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did Justin Bieber say when he lost his tampon? Where's my tampon?

thumb_up thumb_down -42

what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What do you say to someone who makes fun of you and is bigger than you? A: Nothing, you just punch him in the toe and run away

thumb_up thumb_down +7

If Steve has 5 apples and gives Jenny 2, it is obvious they aren't eating oranges.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

how do you stop a bus? Well, just up the road is a stop sign so the bus will stop there because it is illegal to go through a stop sign without stopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are trapped on a desert island. As they investigate the island to find food and shelter they find a magic lamp. Together they rub the lamp and sure enough a genie appears and tells them he will grant each of them a single wish. The brunette goes first and wishes to be back home. The genie claps his hands and she appears in her house, where her husband and children are waiting for her. She is happy that her ordeal is behind her and to see her loved ones. The redhead goes next and also wishes to be back home. The genie claps his hands and she appears in her house. She is not married and has no kids, but she has 2 cats. She is happy to be through her ordeal and to see her beloved pets. The blonde went last and also wished to be sent home. The genie clapped his hands and she appeared back in her house. She wasn't married, and had no kids or pets, but she was still happy that her ordeal was over.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what do you call a guy who makes racist jokes? an insensitive bastard

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I took a vampire out for dinner last night. I expected her to cringe when I ordered a rare steak, but we decided not to let my tastes impact on the evening, sharing wine and many stories before heading back to my apartment.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock Knock Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a boy named justin littleton made his own anti-joke......

thumb_up thumb_down +11

This desk is two chromebooks wide. It will be one once I push yours off.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

One of my nipples is a different colour from the other two. Is this normal? The Doctor replied with the answer no and said you have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who the hell keeps shiting in my garden

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why couldnt i think of an anti-joke? cuz i was too high and a fly distracted me

thumb_up thumb_down -23

The joke below me is retarded

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops