( I PLAYED SKRILLESX's SONG ON MAX VOLUME ) My neighbours loved? this so much they invited the police round!

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Why are large breasts so awesome? Cleavage is sexually attractive to both men and women

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? ghuieruioytidhfdvbshdkhfjh

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Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

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You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

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Why did the black man break a woman's ribs? Cardiovascular resuscitation is an emergency procedure often used outside of hospitals to revive unconscious individuals before medical professionals are able to intervene. Sometimes having your life saved comes at a cost.

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What did Liberia say to Texas? Tag, you're it!

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

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A woman leaves the kitchen.

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Wanna know what's funny? A joke.

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3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks. Thumbs up if you get it.

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A white man wakes up in the middle of the night and sees a black burglar trying to steal his hard earned possessions that he slaved many hours for, being a man who enjoyed living a man of luxury and hates people of foreign nature who steal his things said to him. " get out"

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What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

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Whats the difference between males and females? fe

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Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

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An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

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Joe: Will you remember me tomorrow? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next week? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next month? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next year? Mack: Yes Joe: Knock knock Mack: Who's there? Joe: See you forgot me already! Mack: No I didn't Joe, I thought you were going to tell me a knock knock joke. :/

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What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

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A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

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why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

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- Pete and Repeat are in a boat. Repeat falls off, who's left? - Pete? - F**k yes.

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Benny: Hi, my name is Benny, what's your name? A potato: ...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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