Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven kind of looked like an alligator.

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Q: What's the best way to eat lasagna A: With a fork, although a spoon is a fine substitute

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What did the driver have when he got hit by another car? An accident.

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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Q: How do you make a clown frown? A: Hit it with an ax.

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why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

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Whats the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? Megan Fox is alive

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A ship wrecks in the South Pacific ocean. Only one man survives. He swims to a semi-deserted island, and is later eaten by the cannibal inhabitants

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

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A horse walks into a bar. Realizing the severity of the situation, the bartender heads toward the exit... stumbling over a chair.

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Why are friends like trees? If you hack at them repeatedly with an axe, they fall over.

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What is big, long, hot, and firm? An erection due to the arousal of a woman's sex appeal.

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Why did Charlotte fall off the swing? She got hit in the face with an axe.

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Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Me. I am a psycopathic heroin addict, and i came to your house to violently rape you and kill your whole family. I dont have a family. Oh.

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To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

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Two monkeys are lying in a tree. Big monkey and little monkey, little monkey bites the big monkey's tale, big monkey starts jumping around the place shouting. Little monkey just starts laughing and takes another sip of whiskey.

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My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

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how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

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Why was the homeless man begging for money? Because he needed money to buy liquer for his severe alcohol addiction that was slowly destroying his liver.

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You know what rhymes with school? Hell.

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What did winter say to summer? Nothing. Seasons are physically incapable of speaking because they are not living things. They are simply an idea made by humans to explain why the weather changes as the sun spins around the earth.

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your mom gave me head.....phones

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Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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