Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

*knock knock* Who's there? ...Who's there?... *opens door to find a dead baby on the front door step*

What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

Hello, nice to meet you.

what do you call the man making meth in his basement? the police to stop inappropriate behavior from reaching the children of society.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

So a penguin walks into a bar. Penguin's have been affected by global warming so much that they decide to drink away as they near their final hours.

whats the difference between chuck norris and a normal human being? nothing

I brought a parachute as carry on luggage, I was pulled aside at security and missed my flight.

if there is a circle of fat people and you throw a cookie in the middle of the circle. It will be the best game of hungry hungry hippos you will ever see.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The parking lot was across the street from KFC.

Your mom is so fat, that it causes great concern for her family.

A pterodactyl walks into a bar, bartender says "What'll you have." To which the pterodactyl graciously replies "RAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRR." Because pterodactyl's do not speak English.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

Don't turn around when you're talking to me. Why? You will walk off of that cliff

Where do you find a one-legged cat? Right where you left it.

roses are red violets are blue corey mills is and got raped by you

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because people kept making the same joke about her not having arms so she was hoping the fall would break her neck.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a motorboat. They are sucked into the propeller and brutally disfigured instantly.

Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

What do you call two men having sex with Oprah? Group sex.

Q: What is the differenc between a Jew and a boy scout? A: The boy scout comes back from camp.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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