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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he (assuming he bears male reproductive organs) saw some corn on the other side (using the light rays refracted primarily by his cornea onto the retina) which is his staple diet as he is a herbivorous chicken. As corn is the producer of the food chain in question and the chicken is the primary consumer, a fox being the secondary and an angry farmer being the tertiary, he needs to ingest this food source in order to obtain the glucose required to produce adenosine triphosphate by the process of aerobic respiration in the mitochondria of his chicken cells. Thus, the chicken crossed the road.

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Boob

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A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

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Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

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Q:What did the Hulk say before the bartender refused to serve him further drinks? A: HULK SMASHED! Moral: "THE MORE DRUNK THE HULK GETS! BLURRIER HIS VISION BECOMES! HULK IS THE BLURRIEST THERE IS!"

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

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Q: What did the bartender say to the Arab as he was walking in? A: Nothing, the bomb had already killed them both.

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What did the taxi friver say to the man? "You forgot your briefcase"

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You know what's funny? Lot's of things.

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What really killed the dinosaurs? ME!!!

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What do you call a Mexican who gets shot on a golf course? A tragic incident.

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Justin beiber..

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What did the dog say when the woman put a sweater on him? Nothing, dogs can't talk and he has no idea what is going on

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How do you kill a Jewish person? You shoot him multiple times in the face

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee and had armor so it deflected off. Then I found out my wife was pregnant.

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whats big red and eats bricks a big red brick eater

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Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

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Knock knock. Come right on in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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