There was an old man from Limerick. He was of scottish ancestry and nearing his 76th birthday.

"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

Four blondes are driving to Disneyland, as they finally got to Florida, they read a sign that said "Disneyland: left" so they turned around and headed home.

What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? A Derrick Rose jersey.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken had just escaped from the slaughterhouse where he witnessed the brutal decapitation of his entire family and in his heightened emotional state was unable to map out a safer and more sensible route.

How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

A paraplegic walks into a bar.

What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

a little girl gets raped

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Q: Why do so many of these anti jokes contain refrigerators? A: Seriously I don't know why

What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

one time, a fancy business man walked into a bar. but then he figured out that he wasnt supposed to be there. so he politely apologized to the mortician an and he granted him permission to exit the closet.

Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

How could you ever watch a man hit another man and say nothing? UFC is on at 9:00pm.

How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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