Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

Why is Kayne West such a jerk? He has autism.

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

LOL May Wong

uhh i dont feel like writing a joke

Yo daddy!

Why were the floors of the movie theaters so sticky? Spilled beverages.

thumbs up!

say cheese

she wasn't 18

what did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? cancer

(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... *i love you, you love me* He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

Why did the mushroom get invited to the party? He is a fun-gi!!

How old are you? 20

This is a joke

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them.

a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z which one does not belong answer: none

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

Did the boy ever tell you how he died? Trick questions he's dead, deceased bodies can't talk.

What's sad about four black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? Jerome never wanted it to end like this. James, his best friend, was drunk... Again. That was just the way he was. He got wasted, did something stupid, apologized, and then did it again. But this time, there would be no next time. They were supposed to be going to their graduation party, but instead, James fell asleep at the wheel. The cliff was rapidly approaching, and the doors were locked. All Jerome could do now was pray. Also, the Cadillac costed a lot.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have AIDS".

What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it because it isn't coming.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you through them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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