What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did Zayne have no friends? Because he is retarded.

What do you call a woman who can't walk? A paraplegic.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

25

A platypus walks into a bar, and was the only mammal in the building capable of laying an egg.

There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

KENYAN HEALTHCARE kenyan water kenyan aids-free kenyan we dont have flies around us

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

Make me famous

Why did the person have a scrape on their elbow? Because they fell down.

So this moose walks into the super-market and asks the lady woman at he counter "Got any potatoes?" Lady woman says "Down Isle 5" So the moose goes down isle 5 and there isn't any potatoes

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. WHAT?! You are about to die and be eaten.

LET

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face? The man replies "i have a huge malignant tumor in my chin"

hot diggity dog

Why did the blonde stay in the five-star hotel? She had enough money.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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