roses are red violet is blue why rik go to the hospital ? cause he eat glue.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

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YODO (unless you're religious background encourage you to believe in an afterlife of some sort, be it of animalia or homo sapien decent.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

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Why was the iPhone screen cracked? Because it was dropped on a rock.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

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A man walks into a restaurant and asks a waiter, "Do you serve crabs here?" The waiter says, "Certainly! In fact, stuffed crab is today's special."

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A man shouts a women crossing the road "Oi, get your rat out love!" So she did, and it savaged his face.

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick basterd !

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Q Whats Yellow, Has a body, And has a Spiky head ? A a pineapple

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Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

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You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon.

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What did the man do when he walked into the gym? Died of a brain aneurysm.

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A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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