A blonde walks into a bar. She is rushed to the hospital and treated for a broken nose and a busted lip. She now has a deformed nose.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q: Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? A: Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

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What did the overweight blind kid get for Christmas? His parents died in a tragic car crash and he was left alone, fat and blind to fend for himself

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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Knock knock whos there punctuation

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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Rampage, on the streets of the poor. Secrets finally leaving, escaping, rummaging out from the land and sea of unforgiven people. A loud shatter erupts from the roaring streets filled with silence, the people are coming. Engulfing the city. Red, blue, orange and yellow. Explosives and gun fire and blood flowing down into the drains, mixing innocent blood with the impure water. Violence, detonating everywhere. I see fire everywhere. Once a family home now a lost memory which cannot be found. Everything is burning, life and love. The streets not painted with red. It's soothing the sidewalk. Hush now. A shadowy night. It's whispers reaches all corners of the earth... 'The war is over' Blue skies light up the back lanes, darkness retreating back under its box of everlasting mystery They fought a war We are fighting one too (first letter of each line + final 2 lines are the last two lines of the original poem etc)

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Why didn't Dave buy his wife a watch for her birthday? Because she already had one.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

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what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

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Roses are red Violets are blue... No they are not they come in many different colors from cross breeding and different environments.... YOU ARE WRONG

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what do you call 6 black guys hung in a tree? a arazona wind chime

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A black man walks into a predominantly white bar and is laughed at hysterically, the man is a world class comedian.

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Something other than a Human Being walks into a bar. The bartender then makes a rational decision about how to handle the situation.

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why did Susie cry? she got pecked in the face by a goose

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Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

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Roses are red Voliets are blue I suck at making poems Refrigerator

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What's the difference between a mole and dynamite? - Moles don't explode... unless you fill them with dynamite.

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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Hello

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What walks on four legs in the morning, two in the afternoon, and one in the evening? A dog that plays in traffic all day.

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why dont you throw rocks at a mexican on a bike? its unethical and can severely hurt the individual on the bike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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