Hickory Dickory Dock mother is a whore

How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

What smells bad and is black, A very dirty dead decomposing body.

What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

What was the prostitute's favorite number? 68

Three kids are playing on the swings. One of the kids falls off. He then gets up, gets back on the swing and continues playing.

whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

Why was the Jewish man sad? His wife was brutally murdered, His chilren raped, Parents stabbed horrifically and stuffed with turtles and the doctor just informed him that he had cancer and was due to die 17 minutes ago.

Why was the black guy charged for murder? He killed his wife.

What do you call a black man running down the street? A promising athlete in training.

Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert. It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert who? Mam, he was in an accident. Could you open the door please?

why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

Garry Glitters on here

Steve Mullings isn't on drugs

Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

So what makes you that much adaptable? I get the feeling I should get this by now.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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