A Jew, a Muslim and a Christian walk into a bar. The Muslim is dissatisfied with the choice of the meeting place since the Islam forbids drinking alcoholic beverages.

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Drumset.

why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

Why does Billy hate waiting in line? Because he's impatient.

If you watch a pregnancy backwards, it is about a baby that is inserted between the legs of a woman and is slowly broken down for energy and the remains are finally sucked up by a man's genitals. There isn't a joke.

(you will only get this if you play minecraft) whats green and looks like a penis? a creeper!

Chuck Norris doesn't just have a chin underneath his beard. He also has part of his neck underneath his beard.

A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

4

Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

What is more funny than 8 babies in 1 bin? 1 baby in 8 bins.

Q: Suzy loves apples she will o anything to get her hands on an apple. A: You guys are so gullible!!! She DID eat Tom's apple. ...... then he killed her.

What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

why did the black man eat two buckets of fried chicken? because he was hungry and he likes fried chicken

A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. Your family is dead.

What's brown and sticky? Anal rape

Yo momma so fat when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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