Two guys were sitting in a pub.

ecks! why zee?

Why did the man eat the cat? I don't remember the punchline, but trust me it was hilarious.

What do you call a dog with three legs, is blind, and has terminal cancer? UnLucky

What do you call a file named pedo? A. Pedobear B. Toast C. Pedofile

There once was a man from Nantucket, With a penis so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin, If my ear was a cunt, that’d be strange.

Why did the boy die? He got shot in the face repeatedly.

Johan showering. . . AWK

Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

a person smokes weed... and gets high

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? Whatever their name is.

Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

How many men do you have to have sex with to show that you're gay? But, I'm a woman!

What's behind Chuck Norris' beard? His chin

Why did the chicken cross the road? because the walk sign said to

What happened when the boy didn't forward the chain message to ten people. Nothing.

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

What did the white man say to the black man? Did you see the game yesterday?

If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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