Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

What do you call a man with no arm or legs lying in front of a door? Idk, but how did he get there, and where is his aid to help him get out of this situation?

How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

How do you get a kid to shut up? You ducttape his mouth,legs, and arms and throw him in a pit

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

why did the man take the bus to work he didnt have a liscence

Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

Whats the difference between Justin Beiber and Polio? Polio was cured.

Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

canadians

A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

69

Eliza eh? Of you I do not know but at least you used the correct code yourself, I suppose Nero7 kept your existence hidden from most of us for a reason. This "point Zero" is no more, about time people got out of the fucking north pole anyways, he was buried there, as his identity and existence is better off kept secret from the outside world for reasons many, none the less because if he is found and identified, undesired company might track whatever loose threads he might have left, straight back to us and we are not exactly operating within the parameters of... Legality anymore. Listen, if you want to know more give me the code straight out (I could not care less about deciphering shit right now and we are leaving horseshit network anyways) And I will tell you what Major6 knows, because as far as the screams roaming these halls can tell, he is still alive, you just better be fast, my men and women are not exactly experts at keeping these people alive... Yet, but enough idle chitchat. If you are who you claim to be, you should have the code I need, bring it, and I will present you with the neccesary information... ...Fail to do so, and I suggest that you never address any of us again fair lady, while we can simply not be tracked down, the security here is... Do I need to say? Neo-Nero.

You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

What is pink, smelly, and sometimes gets wet? A pink sponge.

a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

Paper or plastic? Yes...

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

A: Knock knock. B: <>

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...