What's a good way to kill time? It's impossible to kill an inanimate object.

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Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

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im gunna build a lego house what shud i make it out of

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Justin Beiber does not have a really good voice.

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How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

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Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

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If Chuck Norris had five dollars and YOU had five dollars, he could still punch you in the face for free and get ten dollars out of it.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

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Sac

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Q: What do you give a woman with everything? Nothing. You own nothing to give.

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A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Ready for something funny? nothing

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What's the difference between an elephant and a Jew. The elephant has elephant cancer.

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guess what im a bitch i have no balls and i can slap your mum in the face

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Whats is pathetic and just plain sad? Gas prices these days.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

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roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

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Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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