Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

whats green and falls from trees, pool tables.

Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No Neither have I

Terrance was going to clean his room but then he got high, do you know why? because terrance is addicted to illicit street drugs and should seek medical help.

Lol, listen, the suggestion lies in the "not not", you are using not twice in your mind, which under trance makes it so your subconcious registers that you are using a double negative while you consciously do not. Look back at the messages and register consciously that you and I have been using "not not" twice during the past messages, when the net shuts down here, you reinforce the "I will totally notnot, tell him" so the suggestion just gets stronger.

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

Your momma went to the gym, because she is fat.

Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

Why did John scream when he came in to his bedroom? He stepped on a nail

You know why Michael J. Fox makes really good milkshakes? ... because he uses the best ingredients

Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

The cow went moo

why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

a man walked into a bar ouch

What is Brown And Sticky ? ......... a Stick

This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

What's brown, no one likes and has had a bad history? Dog poop

Terry was always struggling with mathematics. On his last report card he received a D- in math. His parents were naturally very upset with him because they knew their son could do much better and so did Terry. Terry wanted to make his parents proud so he buckled down and started studying on a regular basis. Terry realized his had work had payed off when his 3rd grade teacher handed him his report card. Terry had revived an A in math! On his walk home from school all he could think about was how proud his mom and dad were going to be. On that walk home Terry was savagely torn apart by an escaped lion from the local zoo. His head was never found.

Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.-South Park

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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