Joke: two polar bears were in a bath tub. One said "pass the soap." And the other one said "no soap, radio!"

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What's red, green, and goes about 200 mph A fire hidrent I lied about the green and the 200 mph

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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Whats the difference between a field of corn and a dead body? The field of corn wasn't killed by severe blood loss and hemorrhaging after it was stabbed in the back, stomach and abdomen 27 times in 1987, where the escaped convicted serial killer buried it beside a river in Northern Dakota.

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What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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michael: How old do I look? stranger: about 68? How old are you? michael: I cant remember I have alzheimers. michael: How old do I look?

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Fruitcake

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a homosexual jump from a cliff to see who gets to the bottom first. Who wins? Society.

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i like how everyone hates a german version of an antijoke but no one has aknowleged the english one

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Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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SHINEE IS BACK PART HARD

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A Black a Jew and a Pollack walk in to the bar bartender says "how may i help you gentlemen"

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Knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock, Who's there? Woodpecker. Woodpecker who? Woodpecker.

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what did the boy get after his first communion? unwanted intercourse with his priest that resulted in scaring him for life, until the day he killed himself because he could never get over it.

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How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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Q. Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A. being physically disabled due to a preventable accident, thus leaving you incapable of doing activities that are easily completed by an able-bodied person

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Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

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A black man walked into a bar. He cashed in big on workers comp.

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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Why is Joel so gay and skinny? He was raised by goats with eating disorders.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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