Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber where walking in New York . They both get ice cream... then bieber gets hit by a bus.

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Why couldn't the asian drive the car. He was underage and did not have his license yet.

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted to be cool, But I look like you

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What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

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what do kallum and joel have in common they both work at club getaway

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

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Why was a refrigerator sitting on a part bench? Because someone set it there.

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Roses are lamp, Violets are squirrel, I have ADHD, LET'S DANCE!

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Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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A baby seal walks into a club. He is immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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What happens when you put a cat in an oven? Don't, because it will die.

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whats up with the irish jokes? Honestly im not a alcoholic so all of you can go F*** yourselfs...

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What has five letters and sounds like "trucks?" Vroom

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What did the parrot say to the cow? Moo

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What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

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Why does Brianne cry? Because she has no family.

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9001

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How do Germans treat the Jewish? Kindly, and with much hospitality.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? - "Where's my tractor?"

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Johnny woke up christmas morning, went downstairs and opened his presents to find he had an iPhone, iPad,Ps3 Laptop, the full lot. Then his mate came around and Johnny bragged about all the stuff he had got. Then his mate replied," I wish i had cancer".

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being raped by your uncle

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Your mom is so ugly that she had self-esteem problems and severe depression as a teenager due to merciless bullying due to her looks, however she overcame this, found a man who loved her for who she was, and then married him. She now lives a happy life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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