Why does Santa Claus drink so much hot Cocoa? Because Mrs. Claus got tired of his constant drunkenness and won't allow beer in the house in the house anymore.

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A: How do you make a fire with two sticks? B: Ask your mother, we did it last night.

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Yidi Huang lives here.

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Meh, I dont want it anymore! You take it!

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what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

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The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

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What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

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You can go out to eat without posting it on Facebook.

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-Knock knock. -Who's there? -Doctor. -Docter who? -Yes...

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Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

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Why'd jimmy drop his candy wrapper? He was brutally melested and stabbed I the eyeballs with forks and cut into pieces before he could make it to the trash can. He was then thrown into the trash can he was going to.

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How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? eating the worm causing it to breed inside of your body later causing them to eat you internally

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What's a terrorists Favorite color Orange

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A knock knock B who's there A your newborn give me your money or I will hang all your kids

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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