What did the sailor say to the shore? Ur a beach!

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What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

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We have a 24hr fitness center...it is open from 6 to 11

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Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Steal her cookies

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender

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I'm on a see food diet- it consists of fish and molluscs. sea*

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Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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knock, knock. come in.

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Hello, I'm a Jehovah's Witness and I would like to talk to you about religion for a few minutes. B: Thank you, but I'm not interested. A: OK, thank you for your time, sir. B: You're quite welcome. Good day. A: Have a nice afternoon. B: You too. Bye A: Ba-bye.

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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69

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and broccoli? A lot.

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Do you know what a third world bathroom smells like? Crap

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Q: What is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

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why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

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what does I.C.T mean when a teacher says it it means I cant teach

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops