What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house No Neither has he.

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What did the penguin say to the peacock? Die, you homosexual!

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Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

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Why is Osama dead? He got shot.

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What is worse than getting hit by a bus? 9/11

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Whats white and sticky and falls from the sky? The Cumming of the lord

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What did the dead baby say to horse? Nothing, it was dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue Join the bro army! BROFIST! http://www.youtube.com/user/PewDiePie :D

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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Why is One direction the best thing in the world? Becuz when 5 hot guys met each other they... Sorry I got lost in Zayn's eyes again! Now what were we talking about??????

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I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Why did you just verbalize the onomatopoeic sound of knocking on my door rather than taking the action itself?

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Did you hear about the black guy who got into college? Actually, there are nearly 10,00 African Americans who get accepted into college every year. This specific black male is notable because of his stellar grades and his activity in his community.

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What does does an elephant and a grape have in common? They are both grapes except for the elephant.

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whats sad about a ton of blacks in a limo going off a cliff. they'll destroy the car

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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A baby seal walks into a club. He is immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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A priest and a rabii walk into a bar. Both men, despite both being good people and well respected in their communities, aren't able to overcome their differences which are signified by their religions. Both men later leave the bar and surround themselves with people of their own kin.

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Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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why couldn't the old man play basketball? he lacked the physical dexterity, had asthma, and had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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