Mum: Black or white iPod? Her Son: Black Please, it'll run faster.

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A gay man walks into a pregnant woman

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What did the white man say to the black man? Nice Pants

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They say that laughter is the key to a long life. What's the key to a short life? Death.

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An abortionist secretly fancies himself pro life, with reservations. Overwhelmed, and utterly fed up, with the burden of carrying on the family business, he aborts himself. Although he was only 46, his frail mother was nevertheless proud of his decision to succeed where she had failed 46 years ealier.

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What is brown and has 15 legs? (They answer "What?") Reply: I don't know I was hoping you would.

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A man walks into a bar, and spends all his money because he is an alchoholic.

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no really what are ur names?

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Why did the elephant climb the tree? Because he didn't want to tie his shoe.

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Why cant Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukaemia.

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Do you want to know a funny joke Answer- Kieran Reynolds HAHAHAHAHA This is not Daniel Lesiak

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being in an abusive relationship.

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WNBA

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What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

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Did you know that in Africa, every 60 seconds... A minute passes. So sad

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Roses are potatoes Violets are potatoes I like potatoes Potatoes.

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What do you call a young man holding a banana? Well, this joke had quite a good ending, but as this site only has anti jokes I am going to change the ending. Because he wanted to eat it.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

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Why did the Japanese boy drop his sushi? He was hit by a tsunami

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A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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So a horse walks into a bar. The rancher immediately contacted medical help, and with a little teamwork, the horse was treated and revived.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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