david poredos

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Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

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What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

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Knock, knock. Who's there? No one. You have no friends.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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What's faker than a rich mexican? A unicorn smoking weed

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N-E Pats never cheated

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The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? No one answers so the man opens the door and gets stabbed 7 times in the chest

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The POLICE, now open the god damn door!

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Why is Wednesday a bad day? Because at some point, Monday will come around again.

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A boy asks his father how babies are made. The father responds, "Babies are created via coital sex. A man rhythmically inserts his erect penis into a woman's vagina until he ejaculates. If his semen successfully fertilizes her egg, a baby will slowly grow in her uterus. After roughly forty weeks of gestation, the baby will be born."

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Why couldnt the man buy food? Because.

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A. Wanna Hear a funny joke? B. Yes! A. The WNBA.

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What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have AIDS go get checked

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Let me tell you a story kids about Bill. Now bill seemed like any ordinary guy, he had a job a wife kids and he even coached the little league baseball team for boys. Well he had all the kids come to his house to celebrate the championships,they won, and he accidentally killed a kid while trying to hit a pinata. He had to kill the rest of the children to hide evidence so he killed them all quick and buried them in a 6ft. hole in his basement where they lay for 9 years today.

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David: Hey dude, I'm so hungry! Jose: Yeah me too David: Wanna get some food? Jose: No, I lied.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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