Where did the little boy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

A Mexican, an Italian and an American all walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have pleasant conversation, and all return home to loving families safely and securely.

What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

Why did the boy cut his hair? Because he was large.

What is worse than braking a fingernail, Learing that a clown raped your entire family

Her doctor told her that if she didn't start watching her cholesterol she might suffer from heart related illness in the near future.

Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

I was once a hamster.

What's brown and sticky? Caramel.

"Imagine a World Without Free Knowledge" -I'm not imagining, thanks Wikipedia!

Friend: "yo momma is so fat........ Me: My mom is dead

A black man, a small child, and a priest were all standing in line. They were all checking in the hospital after being in a 3 car pileup

A man walks into the bar and ask the bartender for a shot of vodka. He drinks the vodka.

knock, knock come in

What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

A man goes to a Korean-owned dry cleaner to pick up his suits. They were impeccably cleaned at a reasonable rate.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Getting raped..

What do you get when you cross a zombie with a beer? Nothing because zombies are just another subject dealing with the occult.

How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

What happened to the alcoholic? He got liver cancer

what happened the magic tractor?..... it turned into a field

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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