Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

What is the first step in making an ugly girl pretty? Shave her genitals.

How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

What did the Africans get for dinner? Nothing.

Why didn't the woman cross the road? She died from breast cancer.

Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised they are in the presence of a celebrity.

What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

Who is Jim Wonderbread? A whorrible person

What did the elephant say to the poacher? Answer: Dear God in heaven, please don't kill me for my ivory.

Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Sara had no arms! Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sara!

Q: What do you call 5,000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A tragedy worse than 9/11.

Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

whats long, hard, and full of semen? A submarine

Good.

I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

What do you call a dumb Asian? An Asian who lacks education.

Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was tired of hearing that joke

How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

Why was everyone screaming bloody murder? Their home team won

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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