How many elephants can you fit in a car? Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

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A man walks into a bar and starts telling anti-jokes to his friend. His friend is a follower and laughs even though they aren't funny.

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I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

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A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex afender

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When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

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A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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What do you call a guy who has no experience flying a plane? Suicidal

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2 guys at a funeral. "did you know the girl?" asks one of the guys. "No" replies the other. "Me neither."

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yo mama so stupid, she went to the super bowl an bought a spoon

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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Why couldn't little Johnny drive the tractor? Because he had no arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because he was a potato

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Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

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How to you confuse an Alzheimer's patient? Present her with a complicated nuclear physics problem.

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Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

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I'm a like whore

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what can I get you?" The man replies "what do you recommend?" The bartender says "get a beer." The man says "okay."

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? No one knows he hasn't been able to open his presents yet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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