Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

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Q: The red house is to the left and the blue house is to the right. Where is the white house? A: 3 blocks down from the red house

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What did the sushi say to the bee? Nothing, a piece of sushi can't talk and a bee wouldn't listen, stupid.

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What happens when you try to rescue a cat from a tree? It jumps on your face, falls down, and dies.

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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The umpire asked the baseball coach "Who is that on 1st base?" The baseball coach said "Who." The umpire said "Yes, that's what I'm asking." The baseball coach handed the umpire a list of his players to avoid any further confusion.

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What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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Why did the guy crash? He was texting.

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what's yellow, dirty, and looks like a potato? a potato

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Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

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A horse walks in a bar. Several people leave seeing the potential danger in the situation.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" he replies: "I was walking with my wife and was mauled by a bear"

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Roses are red violets are blue im a mass murderer and i will kill your family with no hesitation

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Why didn't the black man go to work? He had to attend his sister's funeral, who just recently passed away after her long hard battle with breast cancer.

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An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

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why do blonds write TGIF toes go in first

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

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I've done a lot of soul searching, and.... I've realized.... the & symbol really looks like a man dragging his butt on the ground.

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Yo momma so fat she weighs 400 pounds.

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when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

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What's worse than farting in a silent class room? Denying it and farting a second time.

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The battle of Troy lasted approximatley nine years.

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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