The other day a man came to my door. After I opened it, he told me, "I'm sorry, your mother is dead." He paused, then said, "Just kidding." "Actually," I told him, "my mom died two years ago of natural causes." He turned around and left, and I closed the door. All in all, it was a very confusing situation, and I'm not sure how I feel about it.

Q: What do you call a ginger with no soul? A: Common

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

MICHAEL

I told a woman to make me a turkey sandwich. Of course she complied since I was at Subway.

How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? A: This question has many different possible answers due to the range of sizes and shapes of bath tubs available on the market, and also depending on the size of the baby in question. It is therefore only possible to give a specific example.

A dyslexic man gets asked what 1+1 is, he replies with a wopping 11. Grats <3

why did the boy drop his ice-cream? because he got hit by a bus

how do you get a scouters power level to 9,000? power levels dont exist in real life therefore cannot reach 9,000

How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

2 guys walk into a bar. You'd hink one of them should have seen it. After all, it is a large building.

What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. | | + | + + + + Why did the chicken get run over the farmers tractor? Because the chicken crossed the road and didn't look both ways before crossing and didn't see the tractor that ran him over. P.S. The chicken died and the farmer was arrested for animal abuse.

Religion.

I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

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Knock knock.. Whos there? To... To who? To whom.

Why did the little boy fall down? Because he was shot.

I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...