Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

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I dyslexic man walks into a bra. This incident had no relation whatsoever to his condition. The bra was just in an unusual and inconvenient location, and he wasn't paying much attention to where he was going.

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

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your mom is like a lowling ball, she likes to be fingered then thrown back into the gutter

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What is sad about a kid dying in a bus accident? The other 20 survived

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

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Your mom is such a slut that she has herpes.

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John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he is Jewish

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Have you ever met a black man who wasn't good at basketball? I have, quite regularly.

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silver bullet?

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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Niggas be like you ugly and you playing hard to get, yo ass already hard to want!

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Osama Bin Laden dies.

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- Why a black man can not jump? - Because he broken his leg.

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What did the cashier say to the customer? You're total is $27.95

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

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And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

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Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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