What do you call it when you eat cheese that's not yours? Stealing.

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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yo mama is so dumb she went to dr. dre for a pepsmear

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead why did the dog fall out of the tree? because it was attached to the monkey

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What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

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What is worse the the Holocaust? Nothing

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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Why was the woman?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Knock knock Nobody's home.

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Q: The red house is to the left and the blue house is to the right. Where is the white house? A: 3 blocks down from the red house

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What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

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I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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how do you find will smith in the snow? with rescue dogs

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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What did one theoretical physicist say to another theoretical physicist? Hey there Bill, how's Nancy and the kids doing?

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Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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