why did annie fall of the swing? she had no arms.. knock knock who's there? not annie.

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

What's the difference between a blonde and a blow up doll? The blonde is a person, you sexist asshole.

If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

The geese of Growmore

Three french men are in the car wearing sombreros. They're trying to get to Disney World.

whoever said we're all soft on the inside was probably not an experienced doctor.

******************************************************** Okay, so there were two muffins in the oven. One muffin said, "Oh my gosh! We're gonna die!" The other muffin said, "Whoa a talking muffin!" **********************************************************

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

roses are red, violets are blue, get on your knees ho, and stick to me like glue.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

Why was the little girl lying on the floor? Because she had no arms or legs.

Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

What flys? A fly

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first moneky.. Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game.. Why did the 4th monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure..

just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

What does Obama and Darth Vader Have in Common? Nothing. Darth Vader is not a real person and thus cannot be compared to the president of the UNited States.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

roses are red violets are blue What smells like poo? Your waffle's blue

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What did the 10 year old luekemia patient get for christmas? Dead parents

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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