Why did the woman stop running? She was an escaped convict that had been on the run for twelve years and the police had finally found the place where she was hidding. Upon arriving at her house she started to open fire on the three police cars, hit two cops and killed one more. The two are fine and are going through physical therapy as they were both hit in the spine and have a difficult time performing the smallest task. The one was one called billy. Billy had died in the hospital after asking if they had got her. He died believing a lie. They never got her. She is still on the run, I lied about her stopping.

Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

Q: what did one kangaroo say too the other kangaroo? A: I was told I am schizophrenic.

Why didn't the parakeet eat my diarrhea? I already ate it.

Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

Why did the black man get pulled over by a cop? He was driving 12 miles over the speed limit.

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

Why did the woman scream when she saw the mouse? Because she's afraid of technology.

What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Mr Dalgleish in a formal setting, Kenny in an informal one.

Pitbull is Mr. Worldwide because his music sucks everywhere in the world

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

why did the chicken cross the street dude get your facts right it is the road ok well why did the chicken cross the street LEAVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

dfsgdf g dsf g sdfg sdf gsd fg sdfg s df g sdf gs df g sdf g sdfg sdf g sdfgsadg awetrawefads f asdf asdrfasrg sdf nfghjml ho ;l jkm gascSDagfgh dj gf hdfgh khdkfgkfgkj gjkf g afg adf g dfgs df g sd fg s dfg sdfg df g sdf g s df gsdf g sdf g f t r j yu k yuilk yiol o l rt wer t wer t we t w e rt w er

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

Why did the black guy cross the street? Because his master ordered him to

the holocaust

how do you break up with someone lightly and not hurt their feeling I dont want to hurt your feeling but i hate you

What did the American say to the Russian? Hello, but the Russian did not understand

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

A apple a day keeps gramar away.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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