My parents died!

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What does a dog do in his spare time? Lick himself.

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Q:What do you call chocolate without a gag reflex? A: Choc-o-late (Choke a lot)

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Why didn't the cat eat its supper? It was dead.

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Ludwig van Beethoven, John Coltrane, John Lennon, and Justin Bieber are out for lunch at a taco stand. The owner calls the police, and Justin Bieber is arrested for digging up corpses.

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What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

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Your time.

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What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

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What's the difference between a car tyre and 365 used condoms? One is a Goodyear. The others a fucking great year!!! San2

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Chuck Norris is dead......

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Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

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person 1:Dude, look at the news person 2:Yea man, its D ick Cheney person 1: what a d ick head

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Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? Vegeta got rid of the scouter because a monocle built for displaying a person's physical abilities in numbers is extremely farfetched and he didn't want to be a part of a super race of supreme beings that still relied on such ridiculous antics

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How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

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A Guy walks into a bar Ouch

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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why was their a child on the sun? There wasn't he would be incinerated

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Every 5 seconds a child dies in Somalia. Good news is there are 4 second intervals when a child isn't dying in Somalia. I say kill them all

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How are friends and trees alike? They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

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what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

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Was the worlds most expensive comedian any fun? Well, he was funny, but they where all cheap laughs. Moral: Expensive jokes are expensive.

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whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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