What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

A man is in prison and one day his cellmate offers to help him escape. The cellmate tells the man to quickly hide under the covers on his bed and that he'll instruct him further once the security guard passes. The man is then raped. Savagely.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Captchas.

no.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They gave here a timeout, like any other sensible parent would.

Here's another:

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was no traffic for miles and the chicken was in search of basic needs.

What did god say when a black person was born? Damn I burnt one

what's shaped like a tree? a tree

Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

Sally sold seashells by the seashore but she didnt make any money of course. seashells on the shore can be picked up off the beach for free

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

What do you call a handsome nerd? The name that is on his birth certificate.

A man walks into a bar and orders some grapes. The bartender says he does not have any grapes available. The man leaves.

Knock Knock: I have full blown AIDS

What's worse than losing your job? Getting brutally sodimized and murdered by a serial rapist.

Why did timmy fall off his bike? Someone threw a fridge at hm

What is worse than something terrible happening to you? That same thing happening to me of course... Duh...

A black and a mexican start a resturaunt it turns out to be a big success and they make a chain and profit from it.

Knock Knock, Who's There? The The Who? YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!

How do you find out how many Mexicans are living in the United States? Take a Census.

dylan hodge wishes he could suck his own **** jokes thats what his mothers for

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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