Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock Knock Dude there is no door

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

The Joke Below

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a guitar with only one string? A guitar.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A black guy and a white guy are in a car. What is going to happen? They will arrive at their destination.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If no means yes and yes means no, what is yes? Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why doesn't Stephen Hawking play football? Because he's a nerd.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, as speaking to himself is a sign of mental illness.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why do so many Koreans go to medical school? Practicing medicine is a rewarding and respected career.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

An Englishman, an American, and an Australian walk into a bar. They speak English to each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

why is your mother dead? because i killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops