How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Cheese that isn't yours

How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

I love you. You love me. I killed you're family. No you're an orphan.

why did the chicken cross the road? because colonel sanders was chasing it with an axe

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

Why did one sausage become scared of the other sausage? The first Sausage said " Hello " and the second Sausage said " OMG a talking sausage!!!" ...Jk sausages dont talk.

Yo momma so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

The dewey decimal system

Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

mexicans fishing

Why did the fat guy get a gun? Because he was tired of all the fat jokes...

What can little Billy play? The tumour, sorry I meant what will little Billy die from.

How did the Jew survive the holocaust? He didn't, he died.

How do you stop a lawn mower? You throw a baby under it.

What did the black man do after the white guy told a racist joke? Laugh

What smells, tastes, and looks like trash? Garbage.

Whats green and can kill you when it falls from a tree? a pool table

I am a mime

why did the chinese man die because someone shot him

I had friends on the Death Star.

What's a ghost's favourite country? Fraaaaance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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