Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's worse than winning the lottery? Anything, really...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

thumb_up thumb_down -61

My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You’re so dumb that many individuals find your intelligence inferior.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock knock. Who's there? John. Oh, OK I'll be there in a sec. *opens door* Did you bring the blender and the baking tray? Oh no I forgot I'll run back and get them.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Dear Board of education, so are we.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is the first thing you should do when a person is choking? Make sure the person is choking How can you tell if a person is choking? If he's going like this: aaghh gaghhg agghhh gaghhhhh ghghaghghgh

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a free-range chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why don't you have a seat, over there?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Do you like flowers NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOW GET ME A COKE! And a pizza

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Two men are sitting on the couch watching sports, the first man farts, the second chuckles. They continue watching their program.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Wh ydo i Hate you? 'COs Your a Gimp!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walks to a bar. The door was locked and had a closed sign so he walks away and goes home.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops