A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

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Speaker 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Speaker 2: Why? Speaker 1: Every member of your immediate, nuclear, and extended family simultaneously contracted Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) while being beaten, maimed, raped, tortured, and molested by a deranged serial killer during the sinking of the Titanic, eventually bleeding to death and allowing child rapists to eat their dead bodies.

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Your Mother

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Was the worlds most expensive comedian any fun? Well, he was funny, but they where all cheap laughs. Moral: Expensive jokes are expensive.

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Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

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what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

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Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

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hot diggity dog

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The French guy and the Italian guy got in the bar at the same time, but they didn't talk as they didn't know each other.

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YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

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your mom is so old. she can legally get a senior discount

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knock knock go away

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I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

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how do you scare a mexican? You dress up as a bar of soap.

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

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knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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So Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station....

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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Hello, I'm David and I just stabbed my aunt in the eye. Just kidding, my name isn't David. That was an Aunt Eye(anti) joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops