A cowboy walks in to a bar and says to the guy behind the counter "Can I have a glass of water?". The bar tender shot a gun and missed the cowboy by an inch. The cowboy said thanks. Why? Because the cowboy had the hiccups

hello? knock knock. you called me, why are you saying knock knock?

What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

If I threw a regular snowball at a random snowman, would my action directly result in the increase of the snowman's size or would it rather have caused to snowball to become substantially larger in succession? Only a few people could answer that question. Not all of us are actually philosophy aficionados after all.

I used to know what alzheimers was

Two guys walk in to a bar the third one ducks.

What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

why did the the frog cross the road? because he was on the chickens back

What happens when you mix Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon, and Potassium? NaBrO

Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

why did the Asian by a dog because he was lonely

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

A white man walking dpwn the street finds a brief-case with a timer on it. A young muslim man says he dropped it. The white man then asked "What's the timer for"? The young man said, "Nothing really, just helps keep the time." They both went their separate ways.

What happened to the man who killed his family? Rape.

What did the man say while he was in surgery? Nothing, he was in surgery.

Why did the black man get shot Cause someone shot him

Roses are gray Violets are gray Pansies are gray Daffodils are gray I am a dog :)

why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

whats in common with a rat and an apple? neither of them are a fridge

One Direction???? Gifted singers???? HA HA HA

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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