I see said the blind man, to his deaf wife, as the cripple ran by.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. Any more than that and they would just be getting in each others way.

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friend 1: Alright man, i got your back friend 2: AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's worse than breaking your leg? Finding out that your family has died due to an infection causing all of them to perish in horrible deaths

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Why doesn't anybody like the octopus? There anti-social creatures by nature

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what did the bee do when bill tried to slap it it stung bill and died.

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What was Jonas's big success? Being Steven Spielbergs lead actor in his famous 1982 film.

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*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

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A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

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Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

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Q. Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A. being physically disabled due to a preventable accident, thus leaving you incapable of doing activities that are easily completed by an able-bodied person

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There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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Knock, Knock Who's There. You. You who. You are you. WTF!

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Susie had no arms and no legs.. what did she get for Christmas? Cancer. Amy was riding on a swing.. who was pushing her? Not Susie.

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Windows Vista

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what's worse than the holocaust? nothing.

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what is cooler than writing an anti joke? killing eveybody who thinks the " my garden is on fire" joke is funny

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The 80's

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Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

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your mum

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

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wat did the candle say to the lighter? nothing candles cant speak because they are inamimate objects, even so i think a candle would just scream anyway, would you buy a screaming candle?

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Why do black guys have brown skin ? Because there born that way

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Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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