Did you here that Hellen Keller got hit by a bus? No. Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your momma's so fat, she died on the operating table during her bypass surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

an englishman an irishman and a scotsman walked into a bar there was no welshman. they didn't phone him due to his uncontrollable thirst for violence

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What happens when you try to hand feed a shark You have one less hand

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is the difference between dead babies and a corvette? There is no corvette in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why was the boy crying he had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man walks into a bar, and says "ow."

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 killed 6's family

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you get if you cross a chicken and a potato? Answer- Chicken tasted potato

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: What's the point? A: .

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Doctor Doctor I think I'm a dog. Sit down on the couch and tell me about it. Ok.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm a talking horse and that's what you ask me? On the day I just buried my only son?"

thumb_up thumb_down -25

When a suicide-bomber when to heaven what did Allah give him apart from 72 virgins? 72 mothers in law.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What happens when you are a fat 37 year old virgin, with a small penis, poor bone structure, pale skin, a horrible personality, and no friends? You spend all night writing anti-jokes...will someone please like me?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

thumb_up thumb_down -9

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit halfway by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's that smell? Your grandmother being burned alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops