What did the young boy get for christmas? Parental divorce

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If you see a fat man, what do you say to him? Hopefully nothing mean, seeing as that would be demoralizing to the fat man.

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why did the child fail to make his bed? because he has downs syndrome and he is incapable of participating in everyday activities.

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why did simran go to jessicas house? To go have a human taco

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a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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How did the magician make his assistant disappear? He killed her and then cremated her body

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Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

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Why did Jessy crawl to her bed? Because she has no legs.

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Q: What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he didn't make it that far

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What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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How do u make a hockey player cry You Kill his entire family

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A frenchman, an englishman, and an italian walk into a bar. They proceed to drink their beer in silence, because they can't understand each other one bit.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

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There once was a rose that was red Violets are blue Knock Know who's there? Man I gotta quit huffing glue

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Wana hear something dirty? Mud

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What's better than eating an orange? Anal sex with Kim Kardashian.

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whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

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Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned about her health

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Doctor, people dont notice me anymore, doctor?... HEEEEEEEEEEEY!

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A baby seal walks in to a club

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Get in the car

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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