Im Tom and I'm an alcoholic...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Joker: You wanna know how I got these scars Me: The Bat... Joker: The Batman!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

SINCE YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY READING THIS, IT WILL GET THE MOST LIKES!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -62

What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did little Johnny eat his homework? Because his family is very poor and he rarely eats.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Which is the closest animals to humans? Black people (nig3gers)

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Michael Brown

thumb_up thumb_down +23

When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q: Why do black people like fried chicken? A: Because it tastes delicious!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q:What happened to the leprechaun when it jumped in the water? A:It got wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did the teacher say to the student? You did very poorly on your homework and will never succeed. The student was black.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than losing your job? Getting brutally sodimized and murdered by a serial rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops