A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Why is the sky blue? The sun reflects off the water molecules in all bodies of water

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Erica is so sexy i want to hump her

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why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia So do I

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Yo mama so fat that when she goes to the movies she sits next to everybody.

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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How much Cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? A lot!

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Whats funnier than an anti joke? a real one.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

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Justin Bieber got laid

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

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What do you call a muslim on an airplane? A airline passenger.

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whats worse than having a gay friend ? 9/11

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A black man walks into a bar. It turns out he is a notorious serial killer and he procedes to violently murder everyone in the bar.

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Did you know it is impossible to say "Good eye might" and not sound Australian...

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why did the Mexican fall and not the black man. i don't know, go ask the Asian.

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September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

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What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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