What do you call a mormon in a red jumpsuit covered in black spots? Proper terminology for this scenario has not been yet made

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "Doc, I've been having the strangest dreams First I'm a tee pee, Then I'm a wigwam, a tee pee, a wigwam, a tee pee, a wigwam! What could be wrong with me?" The doctor looks at the man and says, "You have aids."

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Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

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GO CHARLIE TO CANDY MOUNTAIN. Charlie is a unicorn and unicorns are not real they are mythological creatures. They do not breath becuase they where never alive unless you do drugs(mr craig) that is the only way to see them. And drugs leed to lose of money, loss of money = broke.Broke = no home. No home= death. So who believes in unicorns??

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you had me at "hello", no need to add "you're under arrest"

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Q: What did the duck say to the bartender? A: Nothing considering that ducks cannot speak

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Why can't santa fit down a chimney? No one can

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Oh look, a dead guy. He must have died

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Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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What smells like curry and bombs? A dead Indian

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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French people

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You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

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Why are elephants gray? So you don't get them confused with blueberries.

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Shoot it with a high powered gun right between the eyes.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Can't Sing, Or Ryhme

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How do you get someone to shut up? Shove a fork down their throat and hang them by thier thumbs

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What do you call black people in a pool? African american swimmers

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Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

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Feeling that your friends do not listen to your insightful conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say "Uhuh", and "Ahah", and "Dats coo!" NOW YOU CAN BE COMPLETELY APRECIATED BY A FUCKING BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SAYING... ...BUT IS IT... APPRECIATING IT? DUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! MYSTERY!

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A Women is holding a piece of paper with her rights what is she holding a grocery list

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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