Someone: I like my coffee like I like my men Someone else: Black? Someone: No, tied up, shoved in a burlap sack, and dragged through the mountains.

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what happens when an unstoppable force hits an unmovable object? it goes around.

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How do you piss off a moose? You throw popcorn at it

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THUMBS THIS DOWN AND I WILL KILL YOU! TOTAL PEOPLE DIED FROM THUMBING THIS DOWN: 147289347809237489

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Why did the woman step away from the kitchen? To pick up her paraplegic son, who had fallen.

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My daughter is dying of AIDS.

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what's the difference between a black man and a tricycle well the black man's a human

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Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

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Jake: Where's Waldo Me: Where? Jake: I don't know

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i had sex.

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FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

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WHY ARE WOMEN SO HARD TO SLEEP WITH? Because the men are always hard while sleeping with them

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Pianos.

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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How do you teach another person's son to ride a bike? You don't. Let his real parents teach him to ride a bike.

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Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

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Jimmy tells his mom he wants to be a Firefighter when he grows up to which the mother replies, "You can't Jimmy, you have leukemia."

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What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

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A jewish man trips and breaks his nose

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Where does the girl with one leg work? Ihop

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What is worse than the holocaust Nothing it was fine with the Jews in camps burning and dying

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What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

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An orphan walks into a bar. The bartender calls Child Protective Services and is given to a nice foster family.

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What did one gothic person say to another gothic person? Nothing. Gothic people only cut themselves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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