Why did the groom have cold feet? Because he was insecure in his relationship with his soon to be wife.

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Why didn't the black man drink out of the white water fountain? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

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Whats is pathetic and just plain sad? Gas prices these days.

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An asian man walks into a bar He buys a drink.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Hitler, a Nazi, and a Jew walk into a bar. Only Hitler and the Nazi walk out. What happened to the Jew? He had to use the bathroom so he asked Hitler and his Nazi friend to wait in the car.

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

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Knock, Knock Who is there? Yo Yo who? *the man ran away and was never seen again, because he had nowhere to stay*

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What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

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Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

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What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

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What's worse than getting struck by lightning? Getting struck while your in your house!!

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What name does Steve Bartman go by Now? Steve Bartman, but he just hides all day trying not to be killed.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

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why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

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Knock knock. Who's there? Sorry, wrong number.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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