Why couldn't the black man get his lawnmower to start? He was too poor to own a home =)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what's worse than a joke about the holocaust? the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Your text.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the woman say when the man got her flowers? "Why thank you."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

This is a joke only for males: Walk into any semi busy public restroom. Stand at the urinal for about 30 seconds to a minute acting as though you cannot find your penis. Make sure you have the attention of at least 2 other urinators and then exclaim quite loudly "I can't find it!" then walk out.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

There is a man with the surname of Westmoreland. This is a terrible name.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the man stop dead in his tracks? He was on top of a land mine.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

"Welcome to Mcdonalds, Would you like to try our new Chicken BigMac today?" "No"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

One day a man runs into a bar. He is already drunk and jumps through the window. This is illeagal, so he was arrested, stoned and killed.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the Amish man dead? Because he fell off of his fridge, while trying to screw in a light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

a man pulled up to a girl in a white van with tinted windows. he told the girl he had candy inside. she got in the van. he then proceeded to rape becasue he was a rapist and that is the lifestyle he choose to have.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whts worse than finding a worm in your apple? butt sex with the devil

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the Mexican guy get for christmas? Deported

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mama is so poor she used the welfare system and is a family of 4 and has a successful business now

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Why did the woman drown in the bathtub? Her husband was holding her under.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock, knock Who's there? I'm there.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops