What do you call two gays with small dicks? Trace and Jacob

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did the black man eat for dinner? a sandwich

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what d you call three arabs walking through the desert? dehydrated.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down

"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains." "Well that sounds like a mental illness and I deal predominantly with physical ailments"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

There was a dog walking down the street with his GF. The dog can have a GF and can talk because this is an anti joke. Then the dog broke up with his GF because he was unhappy with her scent. Dogs are weird that way. Then, sobbing, he saw something through the blur of his tears. The county fair was open! Elated, the dog ran to the fair and waited n the ticket line for a long time. He waited so long, he almost exploded. Once he got to the end, he reached in his coat pocket (yeah, the dog is wearing a coat. It's cold), and found no wallet. FUUUUUUU! By the time he got back, the fair was closed for the day. The next time he came back, he had a hard time getting through the line. When he did, he raced to the ferris wheel. Halfway up, the ferris wheel stopped. CWAP! The neckst daey, thee dwawg whent two the ferries weele and went up. Yay. At the top, he saw his house! there was a chicken crossing the road. WTF? Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Phuck yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock knock! Ding dong.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the daddy hamster say to the baby hamster? Nothing. Male hamsters eat their young.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you get a man that has evreything? Aids

thumb_up thumb_down +19

So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

thumb_up thumb_down -20

So there's this moose right? And he walks into the store and asks where the potatoes are. And the cashier lady says aisle 5. So the moose walks to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's better than eating an orange? Anal sex with Kim Kardashian.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

thumb_up thumb_down +160

What did the man with cancer do? Die

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what starts with F and ends with ead? Fred was walking to school one day when he heard a strange noise in a tree. He walked up to the tree, looked up, and saw a cat. Fred was late for class, so he decided to go to school and help the cat out after school. Eight hours later, Fred came up to the tree and looked up to see if the cat was there. It wasn't. The cat was lying next to the tree, dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Who shit in my garden?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why can't Brent speak at the moment? Because he is eating his ice-cream.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didnt little Timmy come home? He was abducted into slavery.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why cant a black man and a white man cant be friends? Because bont mens are racist

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops