A man walks to a bar. He drinks too much and dies. His family is informed later that evening.

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A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

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whats worse than finding the holocaust on your forehead? a mono brow

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why did Suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.... well then knock knock! whis there? suzie. suzie who? she doesnt know either...she has no arms!

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

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-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

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John has 38 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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What the kid with no arms get for christmas? A baseball and a glove to go through with his dad

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What do you get when you cross a train track and a bumpy feild, Further along on your GPS map.

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A Penguin walks in to a bar. then he walks out.

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What's black and blue and hates anal? The twelve year old in my trunk

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I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

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The Tiarajudens is a Permian land-walrus.

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A stripper walks into a bar. She works there.

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Why was the baby smoking? He was locked in a hot car.

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What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

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How is a raven like a writing desk? It isn't.

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What's worse than a bee sting? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Why did the man need new glasses? He was thrown off a bridge by a leprechaun.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Man walks into an apple store. Shortly after he leaves with a fully charged phone.

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What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

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Why Do Black People Love Watermelon? Because Its A Delicious Fruit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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