How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

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You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

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Knock Knock! Come in!

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a black guy and a squirrel get hit on two different roads. whats is the difference? there are swerve marks by the squirrel.

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Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

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What colour is chocolate? Brown.

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Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

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if you spell clever backwards you get a mixture of letters that don't make sense

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69

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What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

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What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

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Why wasn't the black guy allowed into the bar? Because the bar was closed.

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what would you watch during a scary movie? anything you want.

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Whats worse than finding a worm guts in your apple? Being raped by a alien with no arms then passed on to his comrades to be raped for the rest of your life.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a murderer.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did the boy scream? Because his girlfriend poked him in the butthole, which he was not expecting. Thus surprising him.

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how do kill a black guy? shoot him in the face

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

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- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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What is red and has two legs? Half a cat.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding, he can't walk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops