How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's worse than eating brussel sprouts? Getting raped by a brussel sprout.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A dyslexic man hears a joke, and laffs.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

i said why are you disliking me he said its anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +24

So what happened after 911?? What do you think?

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How did the fat guy survive the plane crash? Because he still in the food court at the airport.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

what did the girls scream when they were being stalked? skydragon

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the man die? Because he was unpopular and someone killed him with a gun. He is now dead. RIP.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's funnier than 24? 25

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Know what's funny? Jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

thumb_up thumb_down -151

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

thumb_up thumb_down

Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what's white and long and hairy? -Dean when hes on his period

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Instead of throwing out his garbage, a young boy decided to play a prank on some passersby and left a banana peel on the sidewalk. moments later an elderly woman walked past and slipped on the banana, falling backwards and smashing her head. The young man watched from the bushes as paramedics shook their heads and placed a now lifeless body in a body bag and took it away. The young boy, startled and shocked at what he just saw, tried to run away, but slipped on his own banana peel, falling backwards onto the pavement. The young boy was lucky and survived, but later had to go to therapy for many years to come, the thought of his prank gone wrong torturing him until he took his own life. What is the moral of the story? Do not litter, ALWAYS throw out your garbage.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Have you tried african food? No. Neither have they!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops