Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

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What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

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What's sad about 3 black people going over a cliff in a Cadillac? Cadillac's seat 6

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Alice, seriously do as I say, I lived with the man for over 16 years, those are not hallucinations, its PTSD, without ritalin he will just go trough that agony for nothing, not coffee not chocolate or any of that, anything that helps his focus. Seriously do not be a bitch Alice, listen to him and do as he says. Its not the first time people think he is having hallucinations when his eyes start moving back and forth like crazy, he is not seeing things, he is experiencing this as if they where real, and just because he can stay in that state for days, does not mean he is meant to go trough that kind of agony because of your ethics or caring or whatever your hesitation might be, the man can go without food for weeks if he has to, but not after you sneak trash like Zopiclone into his system. That was a mistake of yours, make up for it Alice, or ill make you pay.

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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I used to say "I used to be an adventurer like you but then I took an arrow to the knee" like you but then I took an arrow in the knee.

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How do you offend a black person? Call him a nigger.

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Why did the Mexican go to the food marke To get some food.

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yolo your orange looks orange

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what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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What did the overweight blind kid get for Christmas? His parents died in a tragic car crash and he was left alone, fat and blind to fend for himself

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what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

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why did the grandpa drop his big mak??? Because an army tank hit him

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All of these jokes suck. Just saying.

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Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

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your mom is so blind she cant read.

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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What happens when a women becomes pregnant? She gives birth to a child 9 months later.

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What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

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How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

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what did the dead cat say to the dead dog? Nothing, they're dead

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What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? I don't know... That action was so barbarous that it freaked me out, and I was no longer in the vicinity of the area. Since I don't have supersonic hearing, I couldn't pick up anything they were saying...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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