Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Tulips are brown, I need to stop working on my flower garden after fisting a cows butthole.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the black student fail his math test? Because he was severely traumatized by the school shooting that had occurred during the test. He was later relieved to hear that the teacher did not count the test, because the legal paperwork surrounding the death of 12 students was somewhat overwhelming.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red pain is spilled on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

You just sunk my battleship! 5,000 people just perished at the bottom the ocean in a war for pointless political reasons.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats brown and smells like poo?? Poo

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Yo mama's so fat that she has a heart condition.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: slightly aged post it note glue

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A black man shoots someone. He was a cop and he killed a dangerous man who attacked him.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What is worse than standing on a plug? finding out your family have all been killen in a horrible car crash and your neighbours daughter who happens to be your friend has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats the difference between a rapist and a pedophile? the racist has his own whistle

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike when you eat them they die

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What happened to the kid who slept on a roof? He died

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Chuck Norris Isn't That tuff if he was he would come to my house and slam my head in they keyboaredehfiu;qbg;qebnuighqije9qp8ubwrsijpa

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats worse than three dead women in a ditch ? 4 dead women in a ditch.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the boy's face red? He put his cat in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's worse than the Holocaust? This joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops