why did the asian wearing a sombrero buy orange juice at 2am? because hes trying to stay sober and do away with alcohol for good because its ruining his family and he wants to be a good father and husband.

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How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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Knock,Knock Whos there ? Hola Holo who ? Holocaust Hahahaha

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg because if a chicken came first then that means chickens magically appeared. Eggs however may change over time through evolution by a common ancestor because after millions of years of hatching, it slowly mutated by natural selection and became to what is now known as the domestic chicken. (Applause)

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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boobs

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A man walks into a bar gets hurt and falls over

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What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

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What do you call a blonde doctor? Doctor

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what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

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Don't you hate it when you're reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles. _._._

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock knock. I've got a gun. Knock kn [*BANG!*] [L]

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funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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The elephant and the mouse was gonna go swimming at the lake, but they realize the Elephant forgot his swimming trunks! Mouse: Do you really need two trunks? Elephant: Oh well I can do with this one... but its not a swimming trunk! Mouse: Huh? Moral: Huh?

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Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

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How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

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How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours being in a zoo But don't worry I'll be there too Behind the bars, laughing at you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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