A guy walks in to a bar, waving a gun around. He acidentally shoots himself in the foot He died from the bloodloss.

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What kind of martial arts does the Jewish man practice? Kung-Fu

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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So a blonde, brunete, and red head are all on the side of the road for prostitution. so a man walks up to the red head with money. she takes it and runs off. a man goes up to the bruenete and hands her money, but she also takes it and runs. so a man walks up to the blond with money and she says "wait...we get paid to do this?"

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Whats worse biting into an apple and finding a worm? -bidoof

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a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

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What's short and weak and has no life..........a Jordan pederson!

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What did the father give to his son with terminal cancer for his 5th birthday? Nothing the kids going to die anyway

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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I'm ginger no more needs to be said...

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why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

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One man's trash is another man's treasure is a horrible way to tell a kid that he's adopted

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Their, they're, there You're, your

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I could even argue that having blood on your penis is kinda fun sometimes.

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How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

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Why did the dog have 2 legs? he got cut in half.

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What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

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What did the Asian man say to the Mexican man? Nothing, due to the language barrier.

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What is brown and sticky? Black tar heroin.

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Sorry Liz, his sodium levels are so bad that while he is drinking a lot, his body is not containing water, and while his pulse and breath is fine he is passing out from time to time, he is asking for stimulants Ritalin specifically, but I am not sure if his body could withstand that, I really don't mind to pry, but does he use Ritalin? I mean he chats a lot, but ADHD? I am just asking out of health concerns, not that I am a doctor, but I just worry... Flirty personality... More like a clown, he says he refuses to eat unless I breastfeed him XD. He is eating now though, solids work, never had a tougher patient, he will make it for sure.

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What is a person who can hold there breath for an hour? Dead

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who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

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I'd like to advertise the love of Jesus in Kobane. Do u join me next Monday? :D

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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