What does the lifeguard do on his free time? Ejaculate.

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. Then he woke with a fright In the middle of the night And thought about what a strange dream he was having.

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A black guy walks into a bar. Suddenly, the bar goes quite, the music turns off and everybody stares. It was a gay bar and the man was very good looking.

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Why did 12 people die when they went to see The Dark Knight Rises movie premiere? Because they were shot and bled profusely resulting in quick, painful death.

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Yo mammals so stupid, she's got AIDS!

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What's worse than HIV? AIDS -Bob Bobby

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A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

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whats stupid and gay all of my friends

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You read this in school as a crowd of kids stand behind you laughing at your screen

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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What is the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Lamborghini I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

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What did Osama bin Laden say to the Navy SEALS? Nothing. There was insufficient time to hold a conversation before they shot him in the face.

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A fat lady walks into a bar. Your probably wondering what she ordered. She ordered a ham burger.

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Whats invisable and smells like a apple? An invisable apple

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A Holocaust in your apple.

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What did the little asian boy get for his birthday? To work for minimun wage making high quality shoes for greedy white people in North America who dont care about anybody but themselves.

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whats funnier than 24? your grammar, its more funny thank you.

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-What did the duck say to Federico Costa nearby the phonebox in a rainy day? -Quack

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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