Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They discuss politics and time travel.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

yo mama's so sexy... wait, thats not how it goes

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A slutty deer walks into a bar she then comes out and says wow i cant believe i blew 30 bucks

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the blond cross the road? she doesnt know either

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Everything's looking fine, ma'am. Hope to see you again real soon.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

amy mcguire is soo amazing! i love her

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's really ugly and smells like a hampster? My hampster.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

thumb_up thumb_down +6

In Soviet Russia ? ??? ??? ????????.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

-Knock Knock - no one respond , they were brutally murdered by a drug addict.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call two gays with small dicks? Trace and Jacob

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did the black man eat for dinner? a sandwich

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what d you call three arabs walking through the desert? dehydrated.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down

"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains." "Well that sounds like a mental illness and I deal predominantly with physical ailments"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

There was a dog walking down the street with his GF. The dog can have a GF and can talk because this is an anti joke. Then the dog broke up with his GF because he was unhappy with her scent. Dogs are weird that way. Then, sobbing, he saw something through the blur of his tears. The county fair was open! Elated, the dog ran to the fair and waited n the ticket line for a long time. He waited so long, he almost exploded. Once he got to the end, he reached in his coat pocket (yeah, the dog is wearing a coat. It's cold), and found no wallet. FUUUUUUU! By the time he got back, the fair was closed for the day. The next time he came back, he had a hard time getting through the line. When he did, he raced to the ferris wheel. Halfway up, the ferris wheel stopped. CWAP! The neckst daey, thee dwawg whent two the ferries weele and went up. Yay. At the top, he saw his house! there was a chicken crossing the road. WTF? Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Phuck yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock knock! Ding dong.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the daddy hamster say to the baby hamster? Nothing. Male hamsters eat their young.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you get a man that has evreything? Aids

thumb_up thumb_down +19

So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops