What did one dinosaur say to the other? Nothing and if you think dinosaurs talk you might need to be diagnosed for having Schizophrenia. Invega is a subtle treatment.

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Terry is at his job, when he drops his cookie on the floor. His coworker accidentally steps on it as he's about to pick it up. "Sorry" says his coworker. "I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles" said Terry. Turns out Terry is black.

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What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

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Why did the car stop? It ran out of gas.

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out 10 minutes later because he was satisfied with the new hooker he killed and made out with in the bar's bathroom.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and legs? Simply a pillow

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What's big,long,and mostly men use it? A submarine

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What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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cancer

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

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how many rapists does it take to screw a lightbulb?

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

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Q : WHAT DID THE SMALL SHEEP SAY TO THE BIG SHEEP ? Z : BÆÆÆ

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What did the boy say when he got hit by a car? Nothing, he punctured his lungs.

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liam buchan is gay !

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Your mama is so fat, her gravitational field varies with distance cubed!

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Why did the man have a hard time trying to open the door? The door was locked

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Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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