Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Time to get a watch

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has been diagnosed with chronic insomnia.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs in the ocean? Dead.

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how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

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What was the last song those aboard the Titanic sang? "Staying alive"

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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Rock mattress.

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

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why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

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Why did the girl fall down the stairs? She has no legs, that's why.

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how long does it take for a black woman to poop? women dont poop, especially not halle berry

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Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because there is no such person as Micheal J. Fox. Michael J. Fox, on the other hand, cannot draw a perfect circle because he has Parkinson's disease.

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A elephant drowns when it was swimming, why did this happen? Who cares its already dead!

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Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

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u are so............................................................................................................................................................................................gay

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why am I a hobo? because I lost my job.

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What did the kid say to Santa? Nothing, he was a goat.

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What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

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What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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womens sports...

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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There are four black people near each other ? KITKAT !!! :D

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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