How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

What would happen if you insulted Chuck Norris' mother? Considering you did it on a messageboard that only unemployed people with no social lives use, nothing.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

KEVIN HART

why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens just walk places. they have no agenda.

What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

Canada AYY

how many jews can you fit in a volkenswagen? 2 jews in the front 2 jews in the back 15 jews in the ashtray

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

How do you prank a blind man? Uou leave the plunger in the toilet.

If your riding a jet ski and the wheels fall off Then how many pancakes does it take to Cover a dog house Purple because ice cream doesn't have Any bones

What do you call an Arab on an airplane? A passenger.

How did the man die? He was killed alive.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

Justin Bieber

How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A hat.

Yo momma is so ugly, that your father can no longer stand her. They are getting divorced.

What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

What happened when a Blonde girl and a Ginger man have sex without a condom? The woman gets pregnant and then after about nine months the woman gives birth and the child grows up, when the child is adolescent it is able to reproduce and the process continues again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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