I AM SATAN, YOU SHALL LOVE ME BEFORE EVERYBODY ELSE! YOU SHALL STONE THY INSOLENT CHILDREN! THY SHALL R*PE AND KILL IN MY NAME! YOU SHALL HANG MY SON ON THE CROSS WHICH I SACRIFICED BECAUSE HE IS IMMORTAL/BECAUSE I LOVE YOU? "Moral" "Man": Joke is on you, who do you think I am, God?

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A man walks into a bar, he is an alcohol and it's tearing his family apart

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What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

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yo mama is so old i told her to act her own age and she told me to shut up and get out of her house.

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If Voldemort was gay who would be his partner? Happy potter

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a jew!

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mc hammers income.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a metaphor.

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

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A man walks into a bar. It turns out he's an alcoholic, and he goes home and beats his wife.

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I'd really wanted to design a car, and then craft some sort of prototype dream car and concepts but sadly, I can't even draw a straight line.

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In Soviet Russia, there was a movement to be renamed into the Russian Federation, which passed on December 25, 1991.

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What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

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Tim tebow is the anti christ

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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why did winnie the pooh have his head in the toilet,? it was clogged.

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Why did the man stop suddenly in the street? His unhealthy diet, alcoholism and smoking habit caused him to have a heart attack at the age of 56. He died because of it.

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How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

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An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then transported by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their eventual mass execution.

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Why is Pawn Stars the best show on the History Channel? Because Pawn Stars is the only show on the History Channel.

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How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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