Knock, Knock. Come In.

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How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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How Long is a Chinese name.

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12 sea cows waddle into a bar... Yea, I bet, you'd like to hear the end of that one.

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Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

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I'm off to my tank guys!

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everyone. - Blake Woodman

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? You eat a pizza.

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What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

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Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

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A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

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Why didn't Joe want to stand up? Because he had no legs!

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What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

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Why didnt the man eat the free cachew nuts? Because he did'nt want to die from an allergic reaction.

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My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to there son who got an A- in math? How would I know? I can't speak Chinese.

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An Englishman, an American, and an Australian walk into a bar. They speak English to each other.

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A woman walked into a bar. Many men laughed at this unthinkable notion because women belong in the kitchen.

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

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My arms get tired from carrying my big diick everywhere, well at least it's better than dragging it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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