why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a date-rapist

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

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Why was the man afraid of the pack of wolves? The man was blind and heard his stomach growling even though he had just eaten two buckets of KFC.

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?J?o?k?e?

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

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How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? It will probably come up in conversation, usually during the planning phase of a trip to a restaurant.

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Women's rights.

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What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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69, Is funny because the numbers are backwards

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Hi.

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How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

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Jesse is so fat, his weight on his scale says " hahaha gotta love childhood obesity"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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A horse walks into a bar... just kidding the doors were to smal.l

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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69

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What did the fridge say when I opened it? Nothing.

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A: "How much rope does it take to hang a baby?" B: "I don't know, how much?" A: "The guy at Home Depot didn't know either."

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What did the blind, deaf, and dumb child get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Knock knock Who's there? Illiteracy.

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Do you want to come with me? NO! oh i wanted to cum on your face. Thats god damn gay Nope thats god damn sexy.

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

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Are you made out of silicon, because you are silly and your name is Con.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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