What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

Rap. Skate. Smoke.

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Roses are red, Violets are pretty, look at their team, Surrender at 20.

Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

Q: How do you cure cancer? A: By die aids first

1:Nice comeback. 2: If I wanted my cum back, I would get it off your mom's face

Me: You want pie? You: Yeah what flavour? Me: Pie flavour.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Shit I'm bleeding.

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

why was the black man running away from the convenient store? He was going for a jog and it just so happened that he passed by the store

what does a chair look like? a chair.

Teen pregnancy

What did the man with tourettes yell on an airplane? He yelled bomb, and was gunned down by 2 federal marshals, one of which's stray bullets happened to hit a small child with autism.

what's white and goes up? a retarded snowflake

Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

How can a chicken be dirty? It can be covered in dirt!

knock knock There's no door

What's beneath Chuck Norris's beard? A chin I presume, as that is what most humans have under their beards. Chuck Norris is a human and therefore is likely to have a chin. This is all based on the assumption that he is a human, because of the many characteristics he has shown that are humanlike.

What does Santa get for Christmas? Chikungunya Fever.

What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes......

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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