How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

how do you get a mexican to fall off of a cliff? you push them off

what did the blind kid want for christmas? world peace.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Polite say "Hey you, get out of that tree."

don't make holocaust jokes, my grandfather died in the holocaust, he fell out of the birds nest shooting Jews.

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine [Emo Philips]

Why did the mother get upset with her son? Because he sexually experimented with his cousin.

Whats worse than breaking your Xbox? Being raped by your dad.

I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 took sexual advantage of 9.

A cat walks by a chineese buffet, the owner kindly puts food and water outside the door so it doesnt die

why was the boy laying on the ground? he got shot in the head

Why wasn't Jesus born in Poland? Because if he's an actual historical figure he would have been born in modern day Palestine.

What did the women order for dessert? Pie.

What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

Whos the best Jewish Cook? Hitler.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? -absolut vodka Well, you have a sirious drinking problem...

Why is Joe is ugly? I dont Know

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

How many dead babies can you fit in a telephone booth? Mmm, strange question for my HSC maths exam...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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