So, there's a lion loose in Colchester. Should've gone to Specsavers... [L]

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why do black people hate whites? their is no light in the ghetto

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What's the difference between an eight year old girl and a Jew? Only one comes back from camp.

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Why did Wiggy fall into the toilet? Wiggy was the name of his turd.

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whats chinese noodles

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Terrance was going to clean his room but then he got high, do you know why? because terrance is addicted to illicit street drugs and should seek medical help.

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Homosexualism is so gay man

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[Enter Funny-Anti Joke Here] [Enter Retarded Answer Here]

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

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What did you say? I don't know.

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I walked in on my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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What did the black man say before he went to sleep? im going to sleep

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I TOOK A STEAMING SHIT ON YOUR MOM

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Whats worse than a clock with no hands? Your mom with cancer.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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Four Iraqis played hide and seek 17 years ago, one of them missing, why? he's still hiding.

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- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

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Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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