Why was the boy sick? Because he accidently ate his own feces.

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What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

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What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He returned it to the crazed gentleman who sent it to him.

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A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

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Uh, well I think of it as quirky and charming, odd weird, maybe unexpected, I could have looked it up but I am dying of lack of sleep here.

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There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

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How do you survive a snow storm? Kill yourself

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Whats green, has 4 legs and falls out a tree? A pool table

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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What's harder than nailing seven dead babies to a tree? My erection while doing it.

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How do you run faster than a cheetah? Cut off its legs.

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#IHateHashtags

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i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Why did Hitler kill the Jews? He didn't, the people he told to kill them did.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Go die in a hole.

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Q. Pete and Repeat were sitting on a wall. Repeat fell off. Which one was left? A. Pete. Yep.

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a man walks into a bar.......ouch

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A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

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How many pieces of bling does it take to ruin a rap song? Just Two Chainz

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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