why do prostitutes do what they do? Because they have abusive fathers who always used them as sex slaves as children

all these jokes are horrible now

How do you make a plumber cry? Shit a brick.

What did the walrus say to the Penguin. It said MAHHRGH. because walruses can't really talk

Ok class, we are doing arts and crafts today, but remember, have fun and be creative... Thats what she said

how do you wake up lady gaga you poke her face

Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

A farmer and his son were walking to the well to fetch some water. The farmer stops, turns to his son and is mauled to death by a lion because they were in Africa.

if you dont like sponge bob refrences.......... THEN **DOLPHIN NOISE*** you

What would Michael Jackson do if he were in a room full of kids? Nothing, he's dead.

What is the difference between you and a brick? A brick gets laid.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Do you like fishsticks No

What is the difference between a duck?

What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

Why did the Mexican cross the street? He didn't

What is the best way to burn Jews Light them on fire

Roses are bright, Violets are sad, I like sprite I'm really struggling for ideas at this point

Why are bowling balls racist? They are not because bowling balls are incapable of having feeling therfore they cannot have racial thoughts or actions.

What's big and purple? Barney

Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

Q: What do you get when you cross a rare breed of penguin with a horse. A: Well to be fair, turtles have shells

An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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