A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

What's long and yellow? A yellow tube.

Why was the little boy reluctant to approach his father? Because his father was a rotting corpse.

Knock knock SCREW YOU I BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

Fun Fact getting married to your first cousin is legal in CT... bet you thought there was joke coming right about now..........

Sex vagina. lol.

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

The man and the women were doing something. What are you looking? They just talked

What did the white guy say to the black guy wearing a black T-shirt? That's a very nice shirt.

why did the kid let go of his kite? He got struck by lightning

A man walks into a bar. He enjoys a few quiet drinks with friends before returning home to his loving family.

How did 6-year old dyslexic boy start his essay on soap? Sopa is shit...

Two scientists walk into a bar. One says "I'll have H20", the other says "I'll have a beer." The first one is the one to drive them to their homes.

A man told his wife to go make him a sandwich. She said no.

We start counting at 1, therefore 0 is countless. I've slept with countless women.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had just received a call from his family, hearing that his father had just been butchered. He was approaching the farm when an 18-wheeler approached. The tire flew off, hit a candy store, candy flew in the chicken's mouth, and it died of diabetes. However, right before the chicken died he finally crossed the road, not knowing he would get shot by his farmer. The chicken managed to survive the shooting to his right kidney, wiggled to his family, and died in front of his wife.

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen and warns him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and otherwise damaging consequences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

It may be Stupid but its also Dumb. ~Patrick Star

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC for his job interview

MATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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