How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

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Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

A woman is on an escalator, which stops, then she cries. Why? The escalator is in a hospital and stops because the power has failed. She was going to visit her husband who is on life support, which has now but out.

What do you call a panda without a head? Dead.

what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

what did joe eat for breakfast? he didn't eat, joe is schizophrenic steve's best friend

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What has four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill someone? A pool table.

Knock, Knock The door's open

How did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

Why is it stupid to call your son Bethany? It is commonly a girl's name.

What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

Why did the white kids accept Morgan Freeman as a kid? All of his school-mates looked up to him

Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

why was osama bin laden shot and killed? because he was a very violent man and deserved his punishment

Whats the worst thing about seeing a truck being snapped in half? It was mine

Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

what did bob say tothe ugly duckling? your ugly and a duckling

A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

save water shower with friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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