whats are the similarities between a dolphin and a bus? they both have wheels, aside from the dolphin. it does not,

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A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

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The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

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did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

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1. In 2010, 8.8 million people fell ill with Tuberculosis. 2. Up to 70,000 children died in 2010 due to Tuberculosis. 3. Tuberculosis is the leading killer of people living with HIV with 1.4 million deaths. 4. Death from Tuberculosis has dropped 40% since 1990. 5. No country has ever eliminated Tuberculosis entirely. 6. About 46 million Tuberculosis patients have been successfully treated since 1995. 7. Children under 5 years old rarely get the disease. 8. Edgar Allen Poe’s mother, foster mother, and wife all died of Tuberculosis. 9. It can take up to 12 months to recover from Tuberculosis. 10. People with tuberculosis have symptoms such as cough that “won’t go away”, a cough that brings up blood, a fever lasting longer than 2 weeks, night sweats, fatigue, or noticeable amounts of acute weight loss. 11. Nearly 2 million people die from tuberculosis yearly. 12. Tuberculosis kills 5,000 people daily.

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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"Ask me if I'm a lamp." "Are you a lamp?" "No."

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What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

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A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

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What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

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Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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text your mom saying you need help, then turn on vibrate and shove the phone up your ass.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

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Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

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nock nock who's there i eat mop i eat mop ho i didn't know you eat your poo. the wedding is off and go **** yourself in a hole!!

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Q: Whats funnier than Ryan Vallee? A: The death of your family -RDV

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What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

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The Blonde Gets 100 % On Her Math Test

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar and the bar says "ouch!"

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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