There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the man say to hitler? hi hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Hey i just met you. and this is crazy. I sent you my pubes in an envelope.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why didnt the homeless man eat the cheese? Because he died right before he ate it. :-(

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did hitler give his granddaughter? A gas bill.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

666

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Whats the difference between pizza and Jews Pizzas dont scream when their put in the oven

thumb_up thumb_down +35

how many girlfriends does robert dupra have? none becomes his sister doesn't count trololololol

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I'm not wearing underwear. Why? Because I have built in underwear. :)

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock-Knock Come in! ...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what do you call a black man who beats his wife, doesnt have a job and has a ton of kids? whatever his name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is the difference between a snail and whale? A loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Your mom's so fat that she went in to get liposuction and subsequently died from infection.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hickory Dickory Dock My dog died today.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Single man, interested in women. Profession: Particle Physicist. Looking for: A strong interaction with a strange, charming woman. One who will ride both up and down the roller-coaster of a relationship, that is not fussy about being top or bottom and that is not impartial to the many flavours of life. I look forward to you spinning me around; Yours Sub-atomically, Professor Quark.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops