Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

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what do you get when you stick a pair of scissors in a four year old? an erection.

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Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

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What did one orphan say to the other? My parents are dead.

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Why can't Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish

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Why is America such a great place to live? It's not North Korea.

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q

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In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

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pobody's nerfect

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Your mom is so fat That the salesman advised her not to buy the tight dress

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PENIS :)

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My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

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What would the Swatch be called if it was made by a Croatian company? A Crwatch.

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A black man walks into a bar. A few minutes later a jewish man enters. Next door, a twelve year old girl is crying over the tragic death of her mother due to terminal cancer.

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Jimmy was skipping in the park one day when a young boy stopped him. "Hello there, would you like to be friends? We can go behind the old oak tree and play soccer!" asked the boy. "Ok!" replied Jimmy, and they went off together to play. The so-called 'young boy' was actually a wanted midget rapist. Jimmy was brutally raped and filmed. The film was later uploaded onto the internet where it blew up in a matter of weeks. Jimmy had to move schools 6 times and had to go to counselling every week. He finds it hard making friends and later went on to become a heavy cocaine addict.

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What's the difference of 13 and 4? 9

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

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"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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What did one prisoner on death row say to the other? Can you please clean off the seat when you're done? I'd like to die in my own urine.

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Have you read Shakespeare? Dunno. Who wrote it? Shakespeare.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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