When Chuck Norris moved into a new house he decide to renovate because he didn't like the staircase.

That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

What is invisible and smells like carrots? Invisible carrots.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm sorry to say it but i hate you

why does god like Justin Bieber? He can't god doesn't like the devil.

A player under the tag "KiTcHeNGuRLxGaMerZ143" got a message after finishing a map on call of duty. "lol ur good."

What's the difference between a giraffe and an erection? An erection is much easier to obtain.

Have you ever seen Stevie Wonders house? I have it's actually really nice

What starts with P and ends in ORN? Porn.

why did the little boy start to cry? because his parents didn't love him

Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

what goes ha ha ha ..plop? We are all going to die.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

well use a tissue!

what did the teacher say to his student? do your work.

what do you call a mentally and physically obese man? nothing until you know or obtain his name

me and joey are going to watch the football game, at this point you relize you shouldn't hang out with joey and the other guy because it is joey and I not me and joey

Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

why do people take pictures in the bathroom? because they just got done taking a crap and they wanna see if they lost weight.

What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

Why did the crocodile cross the road? It is actually highly improbable that such a large reptile would be in a residential area where such roads would exist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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