Why did little Jimmy go crying to his mummy? Because she was shot.

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You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

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Whats red and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket Whats blue and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

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Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

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Does an Anti-Joke need to have an ironic punch line? ...

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

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What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

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Chayton

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why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

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What do you call 2 tigers, a zebra, and a walrus? A small zoo full of 4 animals

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Slavery lol

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A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

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whats worse than seeing a repeated anti-joke? The Holocaust.

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Q: A woman is hit by a motorcycle. Whos fault was it the motorcyclist's or the woman's? A: It was the motorcyclist's fault. He shouldn't of been riding his mortorcycle in the kitchen while she was making my sandwich.

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Why did Mexico enter the war? Because they were bombed.

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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What is the saddest episode on tv ever? The live broadcast of the World Trade Center being destroyed.

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roses are brown violets are brown who shit on my garden?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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