A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

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What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

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Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

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what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Gun laws don't work because criminals don't pay attention to the laws

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your father died

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What's the difference between a bird and a fish ? They're both different, except the fish.

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why was the female student failing out of school? because she made bad choices and never gave school her all.

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four people walk into a maze with a billion dollars in the middle.the people are santa clause, the easter bunny, a smart mexican, and a dumb mexican. Who gets the money. oviously the dumb mexican gets it. why you ask. because the other three are not real.

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Whats Obama's last name?

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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A blond, a brunette, and redhead are trapped on an island. They all try to swim across shark infested waters to the mainland. While they're swimming, the blond turns to the redhead and says, "This water is mildly cold." The redhead replies "Yeah."

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Want to hear a dirty joke? Jonny played in the mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Jonny took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke again? Bubbles was the girl next door, Jonny raped her.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him

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Girl: How do I know if I'm Jewish? Guy: Are you Jewish? Girl: No. Guy: There ya go.

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what is worse than joel an infested asshole

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What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

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What worse than being shot? Waking up and finding a penis in your mouth.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

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A rapist is asked to teach a kindergarden class. The kids learn many things and have a great day.

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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