What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Provolone

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I thought it was the WHITE house. C'mon Obama. C'mon

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock knock Who's There..... Guess who's coming Who's coming Me inside you !

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

do you wanna hear a joke about pizza? sure. naw,its too cheesy

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 95 in the ash tray.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red Violets are blue What was I saying? Oh yeah, your adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A muslim, a jew, and a black man jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? They all hit the ground at the same time because gravity pulls all objects at the same rate regardless of their mass.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a blonde on anti-joke? Fairly paranoid because of the typical blonde stereotype.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Do you know what they say? Words

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Moral: Sure, your number is the one that ends with 853 right? Do not reply if I am right. Moral2: BECAUSE TOP COMMENT... AND SERIOUSLY, THAT NUMBER BETTER END WITH 69 AFTER I CALL YOU! DO NOT REPLY

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't Superman save anyone on September 11? He was in a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

So a penguin walks into a bar. Penguin's have been affected by global warming so much that they decide to drink away as they near their final hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +90

once you go black your credit goes wack

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops