a sabertooth walks into a club. the caveman set his trap perfectly.

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A scottish man having fun

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An English man walks into a pub.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because a tree fell on her. Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally...

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yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

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Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

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why wasn't the boy at his moms funeral? He killed his mom.

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What drink is dark yellow and freshly squeezed from one of the most healthy snacks? Piss.

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My friend just phoned me from the Boston marathon. He was being taken to the hospital due to being injured by the explosions and had to have his leg amputated.

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Women's sports.

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poopy is poopy

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42

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 new what 6 and 9 were doing.....

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Whats bad about a black cop coming to your house? I was having a KKK meeting in the basement.

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How does Ray Charles see? He doesn't, he plays piano.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a shiny new Cadillac? I don't have a shiny new Cadillac in my garage.

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your mom is so fat that when she walks in America with a yellow coat as they get a taxi

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how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

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What do you get on anti-jokes.com? A bunch of repeated "jokes", that don't make any sense.

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Shotest joke ever... Your dick.

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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IF YOU ARE A GUY: Think about a really hot girl. She has the perfect chest, amazing face, blonde hair, and looks flat out stunning. She takes off her shirt which is very appealing and causes for you to get excited because you might get lucky. She takes off her pants, or skirt depending on the choice that you decided upon when imagining this girl, and is walking towards you in nothing but a bra and panties. She continues to take off her bra and gets on top of you. You passionately kiss and afterwords she whispers in your ear, "are you ready for some of this?" you nod your head and she proceeds to remove her panties. Let's freeze this situation for a moment. Assuming that you would ever be in a situation like that there has to be a catch right? A hidden camera, her husband comes home, a rabbid zombie crashes through the door...something. I am happy to tell you that there are no worries about this because nothing will stop you from making sweet and beautiful love to this woman. So let's get back to the scenario. You not your head and quickly tear off your clothes and begin exploring her body. Now turn her 64 and give her a penis with an amazing amount of pubic hair, make her fat, and submit to this manlady. You ask how this happened? Earlier that evening you took a particularly large amound of LSD, or acid if you prefer, and began tripping out. You began seeing ugly people as hot people, and hot people as ugly people. Your friends were concerned because you were hitting on a tree and started humping it at which you were removed from the party by your date who just so happened to be a fat and ugly hermaphrodite who repeatedly raped you and made you cry in submition to her kinky tactics. Drugs are bad, but they make for interesting stories for your friends to tell their children when they get older at your expense.

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Guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do.

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WHATS WORSE THAN THE HOLOCAUST A FLAT TIRE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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