So, same time tomorrow then?

A Mexican walks into a club.

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

How do you kill a blonde? By irreparably damaging a major organ. The same way you kill anything else.

Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

How many babies can fit inside a trash can? Seven.

And then Jesus turned the water into wine. Some did not approve of this miracle "masta, whut is da reezon you did aint make this into tha coolaid? Bible files: Directors cut.

What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

An elephant and a rabbit sit on the forest floor and poop. The elephant asks the rabbit " doesn't it annoy you when the poop sticks to your fur?" "no" replies the rabbit. So the elephant picks up the rabbit and wipes his but with him.

What's brown and smells like shit? The rapidly decaying bodies of several dead chipmunks.

You know what big feet mean? Big socks

yo mamma is so fat when people look at her they say "you're fat"

Three bars walk into a Jew.

Yo mamas so stupid that she received slightly below average in her latest maths test

ROSES ARE RED VILOIT ARE BLUE MY NAME IS MISIMOA AND I SMELL LIKE POO

Why is the moon gray? Why is it not?

Why did the black man have lots of money. He studied hard at school and got into a good university. He dedicated 5 years of his life working relentlessly and getting his diploma in medicine then went on to work in a private hospital as head doctor and neuro surgeon. He was very successful in his specific field of medicine. That didn't work out so after quitting his job and realizing he had wasted over 7 years of his life achieving nothing but lose of interest in his career. He then bought a lottery ticket and won 8 million dollars.

The game.

What do you get when you cross a monkey and a fish? An unlikely premise upon which to base a joke

A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

Two guys walk into a bar. One man walks out of the bar at a similiar time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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