What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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What store adopted the dog ? The Pound

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Steve: Ask me if I'm a tree. John: Are you a tree? Steve: No.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

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Lil Wayne's rapping career

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GIVE

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Hey, do you want to play the r.a.p.e game ? NO! That's the spirit

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KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

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What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

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1: Hey whats better than bacon? 2: What? 1: Nothing. Nothing is better than bacon.

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Q: Why was the Asian teacher fired from her job? A: Because she always showed to school too late and to make matters worse the school had recently found out that she was a raging alcoholic.

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Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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Yo mama so fat that.....NooNoooNooooooo (strips)

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What was 6 affraid of 7? because 7 was black.

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Q: How mature are you on a scale of 1 to 100? A: 69. :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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