Why does Michael j. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses the finest ingredients

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Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? cause' he was annoyed with all the stereotypcial idiots who insist he crosses the road for comical value

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How do you get 2000 people to go to heaven? Blow up a school.

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What's a slang term for a really, really fat person? Overweight.

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Why was the black man killed? He committed a serious crime and was issued the death penalty.

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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Why can't you fly? Because Chuck Norris said so.

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a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

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Why did the women call 911 on her 12 year old son? Because he was schizophrenic and attempting to commit suicide by hanging himself.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

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What did the black man say when he met a white man in the street? "Hello, how are you?"

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What's worse than 9 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 9 trees.

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What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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Why do penguins wash their clothes in tide? They don't. As artic-dwelling birds, they don't have access TV or magazines and as such, are impervious to influences via commercials and written advertisements. Also, obvious tuxedo jokes aside, they don't really wear clothes.

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A man walks into a bar, and he died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To achieve his goal on the other side of the road. Being a chicken he is not aware of the arm a fast traveling motor vehicle can bring to him.

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knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

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I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops