What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg because if a chicken came first then that means chickens magically appeared. Eggs however may change over time through evolution by a common ancestor because after millions of years of hatching, it slowly mutated by natural selection and became to what is now known as the domestic chicken. (Applause)

Keira Knightley walked in to a coffee shop. The man behind the counter said "Wow, you're Keira Knightley!". Keira replied, "No, actually I am just one of your many masturbatory fantasies. You are currently staring at an old lady that just asked you for a latte". "Oh, by the way. You are drooling and have an erection."

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

What did the kid with cancer gt for Christmas? Nothing. He didn't make it that long

Q:How can you tell an asian has just robbed your home? A: You took the necessary precautions to purchase a very high quality security system and you caught the whole thing on tape, and the man was arrested.

What did red say to yellow? Move over orange is coming now.

What's worse than getting an F on your paper? Walking in on a man wearing your mother's skin after vigorously raping her in front of your baby sister.

What happened when the blind man was running toward a cliff. He stopped before he fell.

sorry, that was a really bad joke, joking just joking, of course we can chat later, you got something in particular to do?

-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

why was the tolit stoped up. because it had phoo

Robin, get in the car.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

what do u call a 50 yr old man at disneyland a rapist

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

What's worst then finding a worm in your apple??? Yo momma

Why was Bill Clinton such a good president? He went to ifreeclub.com

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

scenario: 12 men in bikinis throwing snowballs at each other in Africa. Question: Who ate all the world's giant pears? Answer: It was an allergy to noses!!

A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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