Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

Why was the trash man feeling sad about his life? Because he had a mild case of depression to which his doctor recommended taking antidepressant pills.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it was hit by a car

nock nock who's there is me u idiot we aranged this yesterday

Holy crap it's a talking muffin!

A car walked into a bar... wait no it didn't it has wheels.

Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

What do you do if a black man throws a gernade at you? You take the pin out, and throw it back.

why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven. Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" "No," the man replies, "I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

Man goes fishing.... Catches Fish.

A cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. Well, okay, it doesn't actually order it. It more of meows in a begging fashion and the bartender, being a kind individual, gets the lost animal a bowl of milk. But who's to argue semantics?

Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

A man walks into a dairy. Most people will not get this as it is cultural slang and they will think it is referring to dairy products.Oh well. This was going to be a good joke.

Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

why did the man die? he had cancer

Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day... set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black

The BCS

Josh brown loves Jessica Potts from Dylan xoxo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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